


Bittersweet Symphony

by Meekorin



Category: Kuroko no Basuke | Kuroko's Basketball
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-10
Updated: 2015-07-24
Packaged: 2018-01-08 04:19:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 17
Words: 47,660
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1128275
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Meekorin/pseuds/Meekorin
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Himuro is a Pistanthrophobe & Murasakibara is way too ignorant for being a nice person. But what happens when someone who is afraid of love & trust, actually feels attracted to a giant kid that is only interested in sweets? Is Atsushi even able to show a gentle side & how is Himuro going to overcome his fear by teaching the giant to be another person? Surprises are awaiting them!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Before you start to read, I just want so make some little things clear C:
> 
> First of all, the characters in this story are around 19/20 years old, but you can imagine them just as you like. This goes as well as for the places I'm describing in this ff!
> 
> I do not know these two characters well enough for my own good, but I'm researching their behavior and I'm analyzing their personality. And as much as I like to make them as original as I can, I love to give them some personal features so that they will fit even better with the plot.
> 
> At first, I wanted to make Himuro as a girl, but dear Lord who am I kidding? I love male action.  
> I gave Himuro some personal issues, some complexes, shyness as well as Pistanthrophobia.
> 
> Murasakibara on the other side is a character I will work on more while this story goes on. He is more like a giant child, acting self centered and being in his own world.
> 
> But that's when both will realize that they see similarities in their being...
> 
> CONTAINS: smut (boy x boy), awkward situations, pervy situations, lovely situations, depression
> 
> ˚ º • • º ˚˚ º • • º ˚˚ º • • º ˚

This town, totally different from his home and yet somewhat familiar. But that was just what he wanted. A new beginning in this land. Here, he hoped to find his luck and his peace.

Away from his beloved family and all the things that happened in that twisted little town he lived for 19 years. He was here, long ago and remembered how sad he had been for leaving this beautiful place.

But finally, he made it out of there and managed to fly to Japan to start a new life.

Thanks to basketball, he found that bargain to a trip to Japan, where they would search for new talents. And If he would be good enough to show his skills, they would pay him for being here during winter.

Himuro smiled softly as his murky gray eyes looked at the map in his hands. Being new in this part of Japan, he had no clue where to go to find his school. He walked blindly through the streets, always searching for the letters that would say: Yosen HIgh

He looked around the place that bloomed with cherry blossom trees that hung down over the river. While looking at the small bridge that was in the middle of the street, he could see a building that looked like a gym.

Walking slowly, he ruffled his slick black hair and shouldered his bag. He was quite nervous. Meeting new people was always hard for him even if he never showed it.

As he walked closer to the building, he hurt the sound of students, running in the gym. Did they start or was he just late? IT has been still 10 min!

The male walked to the door, inhaled deeply and pushed the it aside. Instantly, the familiar smell of sweat and polished floor came into his nose, making him ready to join them.

The dark haired boy looked around to see some students in his age, running big circles. His eyes focused directly on the big male with purple hair whom height was ridiculous.

Observing him, he noticed that this guy ran at the end of the group, munching. Himuro frowned his brows for a brief moment. Eating while running?

He shrugged his shoulders and searched for the captain of his new team. As he stepped in, he couldn't find him and wondered. Now he had to ask someone...

Sighing threw his nose, he walked around to the other side of the gym and wondered what would be the best thing to do now? He didn't want to stop them now and ask nor did he want to wait here until they were done.

As he stood there, thinking about what to do, a woman suddenly appeared by his side.

"You must be Nr.12?" He asked and Himuro turned his face to her. She had long black hair and a somewhat stern expression on her face. Although she was smiling softly, she made the expression of being very strict.

Wearing a black and white suit, she looked more like a woman that would work in an office. "My name is Masako Araki and I am the coach of Yosen High, you must be Himuro Tatsuya am I right?"

"Yes. Um... am I late?" He asked after bowing down to her. The woman shook her head and looked over to the team. "I just lecture the gentlemen to have a better behavior towards a woman. That's why they are already running."

"I see."

She looked down at him and showed to a door that was behind her. "Through this door and then on the right, there you can change yourself."

And that's what he did. He followed her instructions and walked into the changing room. According to the woman's appearance, she must have lectured the boys in many ways because this room was neat.

Back in Amerika, he used to see a room where clothes and shoes would lay on the floor and everyone had to search his stuff. He searched through the lookers and decided to take one where he wouldn't be too close to another one, yet too far away to seem antisocial.

Yes, it wasn't easy for him to meet new people, but what else was there to do than just his acting skills? Putting everything into the locker, he took a sip from his water bottle and closed it.

As he walked out of the changing room and closed the door behind him, he could see that the group gathered in a circle, looking at the coach. He just walked slowly towards them and smiled as best as he could.

Coach Masako pushed him into the circle as he stood beside her, somehow nervous on the inside. "This is the new member I already told you about. Please, introduce yourself."

Ugh, Himuro thought. He hated speaking in front of groups. The fact that this group consisted of a few people, still bothered him. Maybe it was because of that giant with the purple hair?

This one stared down at him with a blank, almost bored expression. The other boys looked tall as well and that's when Himuro noticed that almost everyone in this team was taller than him. Despite having a decent height, he felt small standing in front of them.

Hiding the nervousness, he began to speak. First, his name, then his place on the court, he trained for and when the coach asked him what his goal was, his desire to play basketball, he had been interrupted by the tallest of them.

"Why are you hiding your right eye?" He sounded like a sleepy kid while asking and Himuro couldn't help but blink at him. And why are you eating during the training? He thought and put that in the corner of his mind.

"Murasakibara-kun!" The coach called in a solid tone that startled even the other members. "I think I told you to work on your manners."

Yup, Himuro nodded inwardly. This woman was tough and strict as well. He wondered how long she was already the coach of those guys? And how often did she punish them? She was like a very harsh version of Alex. Maybe without the big bosom, and without her Spanish charm.

This was a Japanese business woman at her best. She cleared her throat and pointed to every team member to introduce them to him. Now that Himuro knew their names, he actually could see that Kensuke Fukui was about his height. But still, he felt small.

Although some of them had some nasty stare's, Himuro wanted to be optimistic and thought that they aren't as bad as that. At least he hoped so.

Anyhow, the tall guy with the short spiky hair and the rough body built like a gorilla, came up to him to pump his fist on his shoulder. This manner should be playful and yet Himuro could feel his knuckle's leaving a light mark on his skin.

"So yeah," he grinned widely. "I'm the captain. If you want to know something, just ask me. In return you can give me some helpful tips."

Himuro stared at him not knowing what to think. "Tips?" He asked and furrowed his brows slightly.

"Ah c'mon! With the your look. you must be having great luck with the ladies!"

He slapped his big hand on Himuro's back and laughed wildly as the other member's just rolled with their eyes. "He's so desperate to find a girl that anything will do." Kensuke mumbled and sighed.

"And I'm still concerned that I still don't have one."

Himuro couldn't help but smile, amused as he watched them. Indeed, those guys made a rough appearance but they still acted normally and even goofy.

Well not everyone. The giant purple-haired just to observe the situation as his face seemed to be thinking about other stuff. Wei Liu, the other tall guy who must have been like 5cm shorter than purple-head was waiting for them.

A calm soul without any outstanding personality and yet he looked like a mix of Japanese and Chinese. Even his name sounded different than national Japanese.

After this round where the coach left them for some minutes, Himuro just observed the team and how they were acting towards each other and he noticed that he was not the only one who observed the scene.

Murasakibara, swallowing a candy bar just like that looked from above at him which make him nervous. What was this guy thinking? Or was he in his own thoughts and just stopping his gaze at him?

However to escape this awkwardness, Himuro just smiled clumsily, which the other male didn't even catch. Ouch, how much he hated it when this happened.

Smiling at someone when it took him so much effort and yet no respond seems to come. He exhaled through his nose and was glad as the coach came back to let them run their rounds.

"You can chatter with the newbie after the training and show him our base, now is the time to train!"

Base? Like, sitting together and talking about random stuff while being in a closed room? Himuro didn't know if he should be happy about it and yet he just hoped for the best.

The whole time, Himuro was able to hear some goofy conversations between the coach and everyone. Almost everyone. Purple-head still was in his thoughts and it didn't seem to bother him if he had been included or excluded.

There has been just one thing he must have thought about. Sweets and shooting hoops constantly. But Himuro could do that, too. That's why he traveled to this place to play with this team together. To show the result of his enormous effort in training.

As he grabbed the ball, he quickly dashed around the obstacles made a turn around himself and when suddenly Kensuke blocked his way, he was sure to use his special trick.

He jumped as well as the other guy did and threw the ball somewhere over his own head, just to grab it again and throw it twice. How often he had to learn this little fake trick that somehow surprised the whole team.

At the end of the day, Himuro had the impression that his shots which the other members wanted to see over and over, he managed to show that he was a worthy member for them.

Being praised by the coach and the captain, Himuro knew that he could be a great help inside this team. There has been just one little hook. While using that technique again, Murasakibara suddenly appeared out of nowhere and slapped the ball out of his hand.

Surprised by that action, Himuro thought this guy didn't want to be offensive since he had been in his corner and shooting from that point.

"Ah, Mursakibara-kun, don't be a killjoy." the captain grumbled while stretching his upper body. "I am not." the other one simply replied. "But I have to move from time to time, you know."

Violet orbs looked down into gray ones. "Do you love basketball?" He asked. What was with this guy? All the time he played the sleeping lion who had been in his own world and now he stood right before his nose as if he was about to confront him about something.

But Himuro didn't want to seem weak nor shy even though he knew the truth. It was all the power in his acting. "Yes, I do." He responded calmly and waiting for the mail.

"Mmm..." What a strange answer that came from above. It looked as if he wasn't pleased with that and just nodded slightly. But nothing else came after that.

The coach just whistled and dismissed them until the next time. Kenichi just made a scornful tone. "Don't think about it. This guy is a bit hard to handle. Always in his own world and always too arrogant to come to train with us."

"Yeah, after all he is a member of the Generation of the Mircales. You know, those monsters with their special talent." Kensuke added. "You heard of them?"

Of course he had. He admired those people who had it simply in their bones. No, in their being. Having a special talent was always something that Himuro sought. But he just had to act his way through the world.

They changed themselves and discussed about random things. And still, Himuro was the one that observed everyone. From their habits, how to change and the way their bodies have been built to their way of speaking.

He tried to notice everything to analyze them and find his spot somewhere in this team. While observing everyone, his eyes stopped at the big body of the tallest member.

Himuro was one who admired people of both genders as long as they caught his eye and this one was really something. A well-built back and those shoulders!

He was very tall, but not so bulky like the captain. Indeed, he reminded him of a big, sleepy and purple lion. As Murasakibara turned around, Himuro's head quickly moved to the side and he cursed inwards.

He stared too long at this guy and now he noticed it. He hoped the other's haven't and turned around to put his staff into the his bag. Somehow, he had a feeling that this monster would give him more than just awkward moments.


	2. Sweet Coincidence

Waking up extremely late Himuro wondered why he didn't close the window during the night. It was freezingly cold as he stood up and closed it. And damn, he was so sensitive to cold temperatures. As he looked out and saw the unusual view, he smiled and couldn't believe that it has been 4 weeks now that he moved to Japan.

Living in a small apartment on the 14th floor at the edge of the center of the city and with a beautiful view day in day out. He could see a landscape of many cherry blossom trees behind the skyscrapers. Lots of small shops and a path that leads through a small forest with a temple at the end of the path. 

He was glad that the company payed his little apartment for the time he would stay here. But he wished to live here forever and that's why he needed to get a job and pay his own flatlet. 

So this is how it was like to live alone. Quiet mornings without much talk or hectic, just like he always wanted. In America, he has been used to loud mornings because of his little brother.

Normally when he would get up, his black cat would always come to him for a nice greeting but not here. He was in Japan and this should be a new start in his life. Now he got his own rooms and didn't need it to share them with his small or big brother.

His big sister would have an own room because she was a girl. Therefore Himuro never had his privacy at all. Living with five people in a small house would sometimes lead to the fact where one had absolutely no isolation.

Now that his mother threw his husband out and his big sister moved to her boyfriend, there was still not enough space for everyone. Unlike here, Himuro didn't even know what to do with all this space and all this peace.

It was not that he hated it, but he always wished for a place where he could come up just by having a room for himself. And now he got a small apartment only for himself. Selfish, wasn't it? And yet Himuro had the thought that this felt right.

It gave him the power to be independent and to seek his own visional walls. Maybe it was a bit lonely and still he liked being this way. No fake people, no effort in pointless communication. After all, he was not able to live with someone else besides his family.

He scratched the back of his neck and yawned as he sat in the kitchen and made himself tea. Today he would walk through the town and look at the shops if they are searching for new manpower.

After making himself ready and drinking his tea, he put on his dark red scarf and headed out of the door. Being here for the first few days, Himuro managed to meet an old lady that would greet him always so cheerfully. One thing that made his stay a bit nicer. 

Yesterday she told him to get a partner so he wouldn't be that lonely. Himuro said to her that it was a help but thought that this would never happen. 

How could he be with someone when he wasn't even able handling himself? And besides, he can't trust people. He had no idea what they are thinking and how to deal with them the right way. Of course, he wasn't antisocial but sometimes the energy input was too much and Himuro was an introvert after all. 

His big brother on the other hand was always so easy going with all the girls he dated, but Himuro, no he had no idea what to do. Instead, he just smiled politely at the world without knowing what they wanted. How was it possible to fall in love with someone and stay together without being hurt?

Of course, there had been people that Himuro had a crush on or admired them, but falling in love has never been an option for him. That would mean, to understand each other and love each other with all the faults. He had just too many of them and couldn't handle himself so how could another human being do this? 

He walked down the street towards the city and looked around to find some flagships. Maid-Cafes, restaurants and even a bakery that needed manpower.

But he couldn't dress up as a maid nor did he like to work in restaurants. Maybe a bakery? As he walked along he found a donut shop and smiled softly. Even if he hated being stared at by people he could think about standing behind the till and handing out donuts. The colorful baked goods somehow made a nice expression.

As he came nearer he saw someone coming out of the shop. Someone with purple hair. Instinctive, Himuro froze as he saw Murasakibara, hands full of boxes and sweets in packages. Who would carry all those things in such an idiotic way, he wondered. It wasn't logical and looked unsteady. 

It was such a big pile that he couldn't even see his face, but Himuro saw that the small mountain in his hands was wobbling. Some packages on top of the pile slowly sliding down and just in time he ran up to him to catch them.

"Hm?" the giant made and looked down. By bending forward, more of the small bags were sliding directly into Himuro's arms. The smaller male exhaled in relief as he looked up and met the gaze.

For some moments, Murasakibara just looked at him with the same stare he always held without saying a word. "Oh...it's you." He said finally and it looked as if he was trying to recall his name. "Thanks for catching them."

"No problem." Himuro mumbled back and looked at the hand that grabbed the first package to just pile them up again. He observed how the guy tried to make another mountain on his hands. Normally, Himuro wasn't that shy of a person, but this guy somehow managed to confuse him.

"Can I help you somehow?" He asked as he watched him.   
"It's okay." the other answered, but it seemed that he had his difficulties which somehow struck Himuro's nerve.

He exhaled through his nose and grabbed some of the packages from him without asking a second time. "Here..." As he took them and stowed them strategically in the other bags so that everything found its place, Murasakibara blinked. It really wasn't such a big problem. 

He had now two full bags, on the verge of exploding and some little boxes in his hand. For Himuro, it looked much better this way than walking through the streets like a seal that was trying to balance things on his nose.

"Much better." Himuro said and smiled. "Ah..." the other just replied and tilted his head to the side. Suddenly he fumbled out a packed donut and handed it to him. "Do you like sweets? I can't give you something else."

Being surprised by that, Himuro just took it from him and nodded shyly. "Eh, yeah, I like sweets, it's okay. Thank you!" He looked at the light pink frosting and smiled. "Strawberry."

Murasakibara's eyes observed the other male and his orbs trailed from his head to toe. "You're Himuro, right?" The said male nodded. It was strange that even after 5 weeks of training, twice a week this guy asked him who he was. Well, that was not quite right. This guy often skipped the training. 

"Why are you here?" He asked as his eyes gave him a penetrating stare. Obviously, Himuro wasn't good at holding stares, but strangely, he kept being steady. 

"I have too many reasons to tell them." He simply replied and smiled which surprised Murasakibara. "Wanna eat? I bet you haven't been here yet."

He didn't expect such a question from someone like him. He showed the picture of what the other Yosen players said about him. Arrogant, lazy and interested in nothing but sweets so why would he ask him if they wanted to eat together?

Because of Himuro's polite nature, he just said. "Yeah, why not." and followed the guy in the shop. They sat at a table that was close to the window. Himuro thought about an escape if the situation would turn out too awkwardly. 

As Himuro sat down, Mursasakibara placed all the bought food at the table and sat down as well. He slowly opened one after the other and ate them.

The way he opened the package frustrated Himuro somehow because those big hands were shaking as they would crush the small candy bar. Just like a little kid, the purplehead groaned and put it aside to open another package.

Himuro's hand slowly grabbed it and opened it for him. Violet eyes followed him as he handed it over. "Thanks." he mumbled and shoved it all into his mouth.

Despite having so much candy in his mouth, Himuro found it astounding that this guy managed to put even more into it. Such a big mouth, he thought and observed how the chocolate disappeared between those lips.

He shook his head slightly and opened his own candy. And now they were sitting in front of each other, munching their food and staring at the table. What was he supposed to say? Honestly, he had so many questions to ask this person, but Himuro had no idea how to begin. 

Maybe this guy wasn't even finding the slightest sympathy for him. Suddenly, he thought about the first day and looked up only to find violet eyes staring at him already.

He stopped chewing and stared at him just to jolt as the guy's hand wiped something from the corner of his mouth and taking it into his mouth. His eyes widened and he couldn't open his mouth to talk.

"You had something on your face." Murasakibara said. "Sorry, I'm hungry." 

Yeah, I believe that, Himuro thought and swallowed. "Uhm.. I have a question." He started and wiped his fingers clean. "At my first day...you asked me if I like basketball and I said yeah I do. So I wanted to ask you, do you like it? I mean sometimes you don't appear to train with everyone."

It was somehow a stupid question and yet he had to say something. Nothing was more uncomfortable than this silence and hearing himself chewing.

Atsushi swallowed as well and looked deep into his eye. "I don't like it." He said and surprised the other male. "I don't have to practice every time, it's not like I need it anyway. But the coach insists me to come."

Oh yeah, he was a Miracle member, Himuro thought. Of course he wouldn't come every time. This guy got talent and didn't need to practice and now he was so sure of himself that he didn't need it. But why does he don't like it? Why is he playing then?

Realizing that he was sitting with a famous and talented basketball player at one table, made Himuro wonder if the others were like this as well?

"I see but why do you even play If you don't like it?" He answered and looked at his donut. Was this guy always like this and what about the others? Didn't they get along as a team? He must be pretty sure of his talent if he could simply decide if he would come to train or not.

"It's not like I have fun playing this, it's just that I have the talent for playing. Nothing more."

Harsh words coming out of him. Why would someone endure something he doesn't even like? Mustering Himuro's little frown, his eyes wandered to the little dot under his eye. But this guy didn't want to poke holes into him and just went on. 

After all it was his decision and Himuro respected him for whatever reasons he got. "What about the coach?" He remembered her always nagging at him. Murasakibara licked his lips and Himuro couldn't help but observe it. "Ugh..." He groaned annoyingly. "She's trying to lecture me."

The black haired male nodded and smiled amusingly. "I saw that. She's pretty strict." The other male groaned again. "Yeah..." 

And the next package has been opened and Himuro's eyes widened as he saw the green kitkat. "Oh is this the green tea flavor?" He asked and pointed at it. Surprised by being interested in the candy, Murasakibara broke it in half and gave it to him.

"Almost no one who I know like this type."   
"I guess I'm the first one." He smiled and shoved it into his mouth. He smiled as he enjoyed the taste. "mmmh...it's good!"

Atsushi didn't know why, but smiled with him and noticed a thing. "You smile a lot today."  
"Huh?"  
"Whenever we're playing or sitting in the changing room you always have that poker face on."

Himuro blinked at him and wondered if this guy was staring so often at him like he did.   
"I have my ways of showing emotions."

"Ah. I think you should do it more often. It suits you."

The black haired male blushed slightly and grinned at him. "I would like to say that to you too."  
"Whaf? Why?" He mumbled with a mouth full of sweets. 

"Because you have a poker face, too!"

That wasn't the right word to use because this guy was throwing daggers at everyone with his eyes or he would look like sleepy panda, which would fit with the fact that he didn't like playing. 

"Oh... Yeah, maybe."

As Himuro finished his donut, he didn't want to leave so quickly because making a comfortable, loose bond with this guy would be much more pleasant. Maybe even better in the future. 

"Say... Do you have time?"

After eating the 5th box of pralines, Murasakibara closed the bag and looked at him. "Yes, I have."

"Uhm, would you be so kind to show me some interesting places?"  
Himuro wanted to punch himself for sounding like a lost tourist and yet he needed someone who would help him. 

Without a word at first, the giant stood up slowly and showed once again, his enormous height as he looked down at him. "Sure." Himuro wanted to look after a job and now got tangled to spent some time with this guy and even if he was nervous, he was glad about this incident. 

Walking besides this giant, made Himuro feel extremely small for his height. As they walked through the town and Murasakibara pointed to many shops where someone could find delicious food, Himuro tried to keep his distance not to touch him with his arm.

As they walked from one shop to the next, Himuro even found many interesting looking things to eat and bought some of them. Maybe he should try to cook something since he only ate a donut. 

All the time, this guy kept showing him places where he could buy his food. Did Himuro expect this? Well, apart he somehow did. The good thing was, that Murasakibara almost never looked down to him to make eye contact which eased him. 

While walking ahead suddenly, the tall male stopped and managed Himuro to bump into him. He turned his head around and looked down for the first time in a while. "Now you're well provided for food. I can show you some other places but they aren't that special."

"Ah yeah...that's helpful. After all, I'm not so good at cooking so thanks. As long as you have time."

Something in the way this guy kept staring at him from above made Himuro wonder and it nagged him. This is what he meant. Being with someone and not being able to know what they are thinking about him if he was annoying or if they just wanted to be polite. 

It is exhausting and yet he found this guy extremely interesting and even attractive. He still thought about the finger that was on the corner of his mouth to wipe the crumb away. 

"I see. Just say something if it's getting boring."

And they went on. With Atsushi's help, Himuro was able to see some nice parks, a beautiful bridge and so many wonderful temples. Wherever they were going, Himuro couldn't stop admiring the views and the atmosphere this land gave him.

Atsushi observed him from above and found it pleasant being with someone who didn't talk too much and yet he wanted to ask him something to hear his voice. "Muro-chin," he said as if it was a question and Himuro's head turned to him. "I keep calling you that, from now on. I guess you're not like the other guys. They are just a bunch of big oafs." 

Woah, was that now a compliment? It sounded like one. The raven haired male smiled and his mouth curved in amusement. He did not know why he found it not surprising that this guy couldn't handle the other teammates. "That's nice to hear, I guess. I think they have all their... features." He answered and rubbed his neck while avoiding the gaze from above. 

"So I'm going to call you Atsushi?" He couldn't put a suffix at the end of his name, just not to sound too comforting. 

"Ok." The Miracle member answered and shove a bonbon into his mouth. "Here." He put one as well into Himuro's hands who just took it without a word. For someone that was always thinking about food and eating sweets he sure was someone who like to share.

"You're not a talker, hm." He asked as they walked to the bridge that lead to Yosen High. Atsushi showed him many small places, places that were nothing special to him, but to Himuro it was a nice experience seeing all this. 

Even if this guy didn't talk much either and Himuro forgot his camera to shoot pictures. What was he going to answer to this now? "Uhm..." he started while walking beside him and sometimes touching the arm with his because of the people around him. "It depends." 

"Ah yeah, you need a topic right?" It seemed that the other male was searching for one and even found it. "What are your reasons for being here?"

That wasn't a good question and yet Himuro answered it politely in his way. "I like basketball and I wanted to get out of America and so I found this bargain to travel to Japan. Well, I needed to show the audience my technique and they told me that Yosen High was currently searching for a member."

"Okay, and the other reasons?" Was this guy really interested or did he want to hear a certain answer? It was strange that they spend more than half of the day together just by eating sweets and showing Himuro the town. They walked to the train station as both noticed that they walked farther than they actually wanted.

"Ah, it's not so important..." Himuro mumbled as they walked up the stairs to the train station. There had been lots of reasons why he wanted to come here, but they were very personal and talking to someone he didn't know well about his family and his own complexes wasn't a good idea.

There was an automatic mechanism inside him to shut up whenever it came to things that were too personal. Like a wall that gave him safety for talking too much and letting too much from him out.

"Oh...we're somehow far away from the town...and I even walked in the wrong direction." Murasakibara noticed and looked at his watch. He looked slightly surprised about it and looked down at the other male. "You need a ticket so we can drive back." While nodding, the purplehead walked over to a ticket machine and showed him how to get one.

After thanking him for his childish interactions, they stepped into the train. There were no free seats anymore because of all the people so they had to stand in the corner, Himuro with his back on the door and Murasakibara before him. Way too close. 

Himuro hoped some people would get off at the next station, but it was the contrary. More and more people were coming into the train until Atsushi had to press himself a bit on Himuro. And then there was this little difficulty that the raven haired boy couldn't grab a retainer from above because all have been taken.

The tall male observed him as he tried to hold himself somewhere, but failed and as the train stopped, Himuro bumped into the giant. Slightly red around his nose, he tried to get his distance by pressing his hands on the other male.

"It's okay, you can hold me." He heard from above and as he looked up, he could see a different expression from his teammate. As the sun was slowly going down, the light made Murasakibara's face much warmer and softer.

Did he smile? Softly and yet Himuro had been able to see it. "O-Ok." He answered and smiled slightly back at him. His fingers gently feeling the fabric of the dark gray pullover and he even was able to smell a certain scent.

Suddenly, he felt like the body was moving and as he looked up again, Murasakibara's face came down to him. He had no idea why, but the guy was almost whispering into his ear. "We need to get out." Himuro nodded and felt a shiver on his skin.

There were still so many people in the train that Atsushi just grabbed Himuro by the hand and dragged him out. Without much talk they walked back to the donut shop where they meet before. And as they walked, Himuro never expected to have a day like this.

The tall guy turned around and pointed with his finger in the direction from where Himuro must have come. Well, it was the wrong one. "Did you come from there? I don't know where you live and I don't know what you're going to do now but I guess that's it for today."

For today? Well, yeah, there had been more things to see, but he was right. "I came from there." Himuro grinned and pointed his finger in the other direction. "Just down the street and around the corner."

Murasakibara raised an eyebrow. "Oh. Not far away is Aomine's favorite place. You know, it's called the Cage where junkies and strange people go to."

Oh. Himuro just shrugged with his shoulders. The view is nice and he hasn't seen a strange human being since his first time. "I keep that in mind." He looked into his own bag." I guess I will be going then. I need to cook something, even If I'm not that skilled."

"Want me to help you?"

Another abrupt question. Wait, does this mean he wanted to come to his flat and helping him making food? He didn't want to say no and yet he wanted to have his peace after being able to touch him somehow.

"I can reward you for helping me with the sweets."  
"Oh It was nothing but I guess I could need some help."

Shit, he didn't intend to say that and yet he did it. And now they turned around walked to his flat. What a surprise.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> cute sh*t is about to happen hehehe


	3. Curry

Why couldn't he shut his mouth, Himuro thought as they walked. He took a deep breath as he was about to take the steps and yet in the same minute, the doors to the elevator opened with a light tone. He looked at Murasakibara who stared at him. To his luck, no one was inside.

Shit, he cursed and walked into it with wobbly legs. How much he hated being in a small room with someone he didn't know well. He doesn't have claustrophobia or anything like that, it was just this horrible pressure surrounding him as Murasakibara stepped after him into the elevator. 

He looked behind his shoulder briefly and pressed the numbers.   
"14th floor?" The purple-head said in a surprised tone. As he heard him speak, he could feel his tone vibrating through his chest.

"Yeah, I like living that high." Himuro answered and placed himself into the corner because he didn't want to have the giant right at his back. He clenched his fingers slightly around the plastic fabric from his bag and looked straight ahead.

He couldn't bring his head to look at his teammate just like that and hoped, the elevator would turn into a rocket, firing them up to his flat already.

No one was talking, only their breathing could be heard, and as they reached the 7th floor, an old familiar lady joined them. She stepped in and as soon as she recognized Himuro her face lit up.

"Oh the handsome young man from above. Have you accustomed to live here?" The raven haired boy grinned clumsily and bowed down to her. "Oh yes I did. I've been here before, but that's long ago. I just happen to forget some things."

The old granny looked over to the giant in the corner who just observed the two curiously. "I see, you brought a friend with you? That's nice to see! You always seem to be by yourself, a bit of contact with others never harm anyone, dear!"

Himuro swallowed hard as he looked over to Murasakibara. Was he a friend? Hell, who knows. They haven't been that close and they only glance at each other every now and then.

This is the first time, he would invite someone to his flat. And this lovely hay bag never knows when to keep quiet. She turned around to face the door and sighed. "My old bones...I wanted to walk the stairs, but I'm just so tired." Her gray head turned around as she let out a small laugh. "If I would happen to meet you there, you sure had to carry me up to the 13th floor."

"Eh...yes of course!"  
"What a polite boy." she muttered and made Himuro blush again. She was treating him like one of her children, even if she didn't know him that well.

It was a nice feeling that she cared about him and yet she could say the most awkward things, especially now. Atsushi on the other end of the elevator, just listened and observed the two without a change in his face. 

Finally, they reached the 13th floor, where his neighbor would get out, but as soon as she stepped outside, she quickly returned to face the miracle member.

"Please take good care of him." She said to him with a wink and disappeared. Himuro couldn't believe it and opened his mouth slightly. Atsushi was surprised as well, but still answered with a nod. "Ah, yeah."

The smaller male bit his inner cheek and exhaled quietly. To his relief, they quickly arrived the wished floor and stepped out. Himuro, not to show his nervousness, slowly walked ahead to show his guest where he was actually living.

They needed to walk around the corner, to the end of the hallway. He fumbled his keys out of his pocket and unlocked the door to step in. As he held it open to make room for Atsushi, this one had to duck to fit under the frame.

"So..." Himuro exhaled. "Here were are. This is my sober resting place."  
"Resting place?" Atsushi repeated after looking around.

"Eh yes..." Himuro walked to the kitchen and put the bag onto the table. "This is just temporary because of the basketball games. An organization is paying for my flat. After the matches, I need to pay it for myself, and I don't know..."

He stuck his head out of the kitchen to look after his guest and bumped into him. "I-If I'll be able to afford it."

Atsushi looked down at him. "I see." It seemed that he was thinking about something, but Himuro couldn't figure out what it was. And better didn't want to know it. Probably, if he was able to find some snacks here? 

He needed to get a grip on himself because this guy managed to make him into such a nervous mess, it started to annoy him for acting so weird.

"So, uhm, what can you teach me?" He asked and put out the groceries out of his bag. "The only thing I can do so far is Ramen and some other simple things."

Atsushi followed him and looked at the bought things as if he was an inspector. Making such a face was surely a thing he hadn't seen before.

"I see, looks like we could make some Kare. Did you try it?"   
"Ah, no, you mean Curry? I've seen it many times before, but I never tried it out."  
"Okay, so let's make, uh Curry. You can start by cutting those into slices."

Himuro nodded and took the carrots while grinning like an idiot. The way this guy said "Curry" somehow made him smile.

"Oh, you can just grab the things you need, by the way." He said and let Murasakibara look though his kitchen equipment. While Himuro cut the vegetables, the other male looked in his bag for some spices.

"Do you have rice and some chicken meat?"  
"Yeah, here."

He wiped his hands clean and grabbed the said things out. Handing them over, he noticed that Atsushi somehow had a weird expression on his face. He looked as if he was concentrated and yet somehow relaxed. How was this possible?

Was he trying to keep his nervousness under control just like Himuro had to? But who was he kidding? This guy didn't need it and yet Himuro wondered what he was up to. 

Silence, again. He could hear rattling behind him while Murasakibara took out a pot and placed it on the hot plate. As he looked over to his smaller teammate he titled his head to the side.

"You should try it like this." He suddenly said, standing close behind Himuro and taking his hand into his own, guiding his hand. Himuro's eyes widened and his heart stopped. Feeling the pressure from behind, he didn't dare to breath.

Looking down and concentrating on the big hand on his own, he let himself guide and felt how his face heated up. "Your flat is kinda comfortable."

What does this mean "kinda"? And why is he teaching him how to chop vegetables? This was getting strange and yet a part of him was happy about it. That tiny little part, Himuro almost forgot he has it. 

"It has all the needful stuff and I can't complain." Just keep cool and don't freak out, he reminded himself. Everything's fine. KINDA.

"A simple man with simple desires."   
"More or less..." Himuro thought about it for a moment. If he would be honest with himself, he could say that he had some desire. Some desire, so big and somewhat unreachable that he couldn't bring them out and besides, he couldn't talk about them so freely. He wasn't that kind of a person who would go to a stranger and tell him his whole life story.

"You're a real shut in, hm?" He heard from besides and turned his head as he heard the voice closer than expected. And yes, it was, because Atsushi bowed down and could rest his head on Himuro's shoulder.

Instead, he just kept his head beside him and looked at him. Himuro blinked, not knowing what to answer and thankfully hadn't to because the rice was boiling and nearly slopping over. 

With his long arm, Atsushi turned the heat down and stepped back to give the other boy some room. Making himself at home, the purple-head started to roast the meat.

He pointed at the vegetables on the plate to put them into the same pan and showed Himuro the various spices he brought himself. And there they were again, after an awkward silence there is this comfortable talking he enjoyed. 

And the way this guy talked about food and how to use this thing with this thing made him more special. It was as if some of his arrogance would fall from his iron to make room for some kindness. 

Was it possible that this giant, was desperately clinging onto his own walls just like Himuro did? Himuro couldn't really believe that and still, something about this guy was just strange and even interesting.

"So...everything's done and the pot is going to boil for 15 min, eh do you want to watch TV or something?" Himuro asked after the preparing while rubbing his neck.

As he looked up, he caught Atsushi licking his lips and instantly turned red. "Ah wait, here drink something!" He said nervously and placed a glass in front of him. Holy crap, what was that? Himuro's coolness suddenly slipped and he offered the glass to his guest with a noticeable shaky hand. "I just have water, I hope it's okay."

He gave him a shy smile and snapped back to his normal self. Atsushi looked first into the silver eyes and then at the glass, grinning. "Sure." Was his only answer and he stepped aside to let Himuro guide him to the next room.

This room, which was a bedroom and a living room, was more or less a private room. He hoped, Atsushi wouldn't get anxiety because of the minimum of space. The bed was right under the window and before the bed, at the wall was his big wardrobe. 

At the other end of this room was a couch that was only where 3 people could sit, and the small tv in front of it. It may look small to Atsushi but for Himuro, it was quite fine. Of course, it could be bigger, but Himuro appreciated.

This was way better than sharing a room with two siblings and not having privacy at all. "Excuse me." He said while handing Atsushi the remote and leaving him to rush into the bathroom.

Closing the door, he let out a big sigh and looked into the mirror. Dear Lord, this was getting on his nerves. Interacting with people on this level in his own flat with this guy. What was this grin? Was he already laughing at him? But why, he just tried his best to be polite.

He looked into the mirror again and fixed his hair while exhaling. This is not good and this won't go on any longer. He needed to calm down or else this guy is going to think that he was an anxious mess or even a complete idiot. If the first thing wasn't half of the truth...

However, he stepped out again, only to see that the big guy wasn't there. He walked into the kitchen only to see that Atsushi managed to find plates on which he gracefully put the food on.

Noticing Himuro, the miracle member turned his head to him. "Where do you keep your cutlery?"

"Right here." Himuro answered and took out chopsticks and forks. "Okay, cool. I guess we can eat now. I hope it taste good."

The dark haired male stepped aside to let Atsushi past him with the two plates in his hands and followed him. Sitting on the couch, both started to eat slowly after saying "Itadakimasu."

"Woah, this is really good." Himuro said and caught Atsushi grinning again. "Wh-what?"

"You're eating with those?" He pointed at the fork in his hand.   
"Oh...yeah, sometimes I do without thinking about it."

He smiled which has been responded with an equally friendly smile from the purple-head. Watching television was a good way of avoiding uncomfortable silence and the noise of hearing each other munching.

"Ahh...that was good." Murasakibara sighed and leant back. "It's nice, having something else inside me than only sweet stuff. I guess I over did it."

"Hm? Do you feel bad? Y-you can lay down if you want."  
"Woah, really, can I?"

That was a surprise. On the one hand, Himuro just said it as a polite offer and yet hadn't expected such an answer. He looked at the sofa which was way to small for him and glanced at his bed. This should fit.

"You can lay down on my bed, If you're not feeling well." 

At first, Atsushi looked troubled while glancing at the bed and than at Himuro again. Feeling sick after eating so much candy, would be a reason for Himuro to puke or drink lots of water but he couldn't really believe that this guy, who was eating tons of sweets, was feeling sick.

"Can I?"  
"Yeah, of course."

He smiled his typical smile and pointed with his hand to the bed where Atsushi slowly walked to. Like a giant tree he let himself fall into the coziness and sighed through his nose.

A little shiver ran down Himuro's spine while hearing his teammate's voice. Without causing too much noise, he stood up and put away the plates back into the kitchen. 

He washed them in silence and started to tidy up the kitchen after making the food and thought about his giant problem. How long does this guy intend to rest here?

What should he do now? He was kinda sleepy as well. This guy could sleep here if he wanted because it was already dark outside and Himuro hated dismissing someone at this kind of time.

Maybe he should just loosen up and lay beside this guy. Yeah, why not? And tomorrow he would jump out of the 14th floor. He shook his head and let out a small laugh.

Taking out a magazine about Japan's life style, he sat back on his sofa and started to read after turning off the TV. Every once in a while, his murky gray eyes would wander to the spot ahead of him to the his bed where a person was now sleeping soundly.

The bed wasn't really small and would let fit in another person and even this giant guy managed to stretch out his entire body. Himuro never really noticed how big his bed was until this guy showed it to him. 

Laying on his back, Atsushi rested soundlessly. One hand behind his head, the other on his stomach while his eyes were closed. He had to admit that his new team member was a nice guy because he couldn't expect his older teammates, allowing him sleeping in their bed, yet would they talk normally with him.

Admitting that he really had something for this quiet boy, he turned his head to the side and mustered Himuro's facial expressions. Those dark hair strains falling into his right eye and covering nearly half of his pale face had been a nice contrast.

And this beauty mark under his left eye, Atsushi always caught himself staring at it. "Muro-chin..." He suddenly had an idea. The raven haired boy looked up. "Yes?"

"Can you come over here for a second?"  
"Uh, okay." 

He stood up and walked slowly over to the bed, looking down into violet eyes. The guy beneath him made move with his hand to come closer which Himuro did and with one swift movement, he grabbed Himuro and throw him softly on the other side of the bed.

"Ahh-!"

Himuro looked at him with almost big owl eyes and opened his mouth as he saw Atsushi laughing. "You should have seen your face, heh!"

"Yeah, you surprised me!" Himuro replied and was about to get up again, but big strong hands pushed him down and pressed him to another body. 

"Maybe a little nap will make you feel better, too?" Atsushi said while resting his head on the soft pillow and looking into gray eyes. "You seem to be tired as well. Especially as I saw you in the morning."

"Ah yeah, I couldn't sleep last night."  
"Why?"

Why do you ask? Himuro observed the sleepy face above him while his heart was beating like crazy. This was too close and yet it felt so cozy. 

"Well...I left the windows open and it was freaking cold. I sensitive to low temperatures."

"Ah?" He raised a purple eyebrow and placed his hand on Himuro's back to push him closer to his body. Even if the smaller male was nervous as hell, he felt the warmth from this body surrounding him and making him sleepy. 

It was so comfortable and so warm that his eyes started to get heavy. "I hope it's okay for you If I'm going to stay over the night because I can't move right now and I'm pretty sure you won't carry me on your back like the old lady."

"Yeah, I agree with that." Himuro answered and closed his eyes. "That would kill my back." 

He heard a small laugh from above and grinned. What a strange situation. He didn't know this guy really well and yet he felt oddly comfortable around him, even in this position. 

How fast a simple stomach ache led them to sleep together in Himuro's bed. Well, it has to be Atsushi wicked idea who just pulled him down. This guy surely allowed himself playing with him. Himuro wondered, if this guy planned this act from the beginning he was eating or if he really felt sick.

"Hey, Atsushi, how do you feel?"

The Miracle member almost forgot about this and didn't even open his eyes. Instead, he just nuzzled his face in the raven hair and mumbled. "Much better..."

Himuro couldn't help but grin. This guy would lead him to many surprising moments and this is going to be more often the case, he thought and shook his head lightly while inhaling Atsushi's sweet scent. 

The only hook in all this was, that this guy didn't speak much just like Himuro which made it even harder to figure him out. But Himuro got his own acting skills of analyzing someone. 

One thing was sure, the purple-head wasn't scared of skin on skin contact and he somehow liked playing with Himuro. The black haired male guessed that Atsushi even did all the things on purpose that made him blush so this was the proof that he liked to play with him.

He just needed to be careful not to let him to close. However, enjoying such a sleep with him, was really soothing. "Muro-chin..." He felt the vibration on the chest rumbling through his own. "I guess I really need to look after you just like granny said."

"Heh, why do you think that?" Himuro chuckled. He realized, lying in bed like this and talking in this sleepy manner made them look like a couple in the after play. He swallowed as he thought about this and slowly pushed that into the corner of his mind.

"You seem to be too nice and you always say yes."  
"That's not true. I'm just polite, and I can fight back If I have to."  
"Hm...for self-defense, I see but as a friend I can keep an eye on you."

Oh, there it is. The confirmation that they are friends now. Well, isn't that nice? The first step is done, somehow. But still, Himuro would like to ask him so many questions and maybe he would be able to do so if this guy would let him. He just hoped, this guy wouldn't bore for too many personal things or wouldn't get tired of him.

Slowly sinking into a slumber, Himuro fell asleep with a soft smile on his lips and the question inside of his head: Was this right?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Puh...it really has been a long time, eh? I'm so sorry for my absence, but I often have this terrible blockade and this stupid crisis and I hope you have patience with me.
> 
> Please don't think that I have stopped writing, or that I forgot about this! I just have this long ass break. But as I saw how many lovely people left Kudos I needed to kick myself into my butt and sweat something out!
> 
> Thanks for reading, thanks for the Kudos and thanks for your patience, you really make me happy ^^


	4. One day after the other

It was so warm, Himuro didn't want to open his eyes, but the sun shone right into his face and as he tried to turn around, something just didn't let him. He furrowed his brows and tried to wiggle slighty but strong arms were around his body, not letting go of him. 

He then realized he wasn't alone in his bed as he felt another body on his back. A thigh bewteen his legs and a face that was nuzzling his neck. Those strong arms, kept him in place and squeezed him like a pillow close to another body! His eyes widened as he remembered who just slumped the other day into his bed and just dragged him into it as well. 

Blushing hard, he didn't know what to do. Would this guy be embarrassed or mad if he would wake up and see in which position their are in? Or should Himuro act all offended by this? He just had no idea and the warm breath on his neck just made it worse for him.

"Hmm...hungry..." 

Yeah, good for you just don't bite me! Himuro shuddered as the breath ghosted over his skin. Feeling those hands on his stomach and the thigh between his legs made the boy realize, he couldn't escape. His teammate was one hell of a huge tree, and now, he was still sleeping, probably dreaming about some snacks. And his Kung-Fu grip didn't seem to get loose.

The raven haired boy sighed quietly. He would lie before admitting that this position was kinda nice and yet it was scary at the same time. This was a position for lovers not for teammates who had no clue about each other. And sure not for Himuro who wasn't able to trust someone. But he could still dream about it and enjoy it why it lasted, right?

Suddenly, he had been turned around and faced a very sleepy face from Atsushi, who just grabbed his head and pressed it to his chest. He heard the other male sigh in satisfaction and turned red again. Inhaling the scent and placing his hands somehow between his body and the other one, he tried to push himself away. 

"Oi...Atsushi..." He pressed out and pushed a little harder, but not so that it hurt. "Hey...I can't breath!"

Hearing a mumble from above he finally managed to wake up the big guy. Eyes still half open, he looked down and smiled dizzy. "Morning, Muro-chin..." He greeted him with a slurred voice. 

"Ah...good morning, Atsushi." Himuro replied as he observed the expression and smirked softly. Seeing another mimic as the ordinary I-don't-care look was something. "Uhm...do you mind?"

The purple haired male looked down and didn't find it awkward being this close to another male. Still, he nodded and turned on his back to let him go. "That's why I could sleep so well..." he murmured as Himuro stepped out. "Yeah, you were squeezing me."

"Oh."

That was all? Nothing like, sorry maybe I crushed you too hard or was it okay? Well, if it was like that, what should Himuro do? He ran a hand through his hair while walking to the bathroom and grabbing clothes to change. Making himself ready, he splashed water into his face, brushed his teeth and styled his hair. While rubbing his eye, he wondered why this guy was the way he simply was.

He heard from the other Yosen palyers, that almost every Miracle member had somewhere a screw loose. And they shared the image of an irogant player, venturing to be overbeating with their talent. Himuro was envious of them because having a talent without any tricks was astounding. Unlike him, no Miracle member had to fake his moves or act his tactics out. 

They had it in their being, whereas Himuro always needed practice to create his movements. As he was thinking about that, he heard something behind him and almost choked on the toothpaste. 

"Sorry, but where do you keep your water?"   
Spitting out, Himuro wished his mouth with the back of his hand. "Under the sink, in the kitchen."  
"thanks."

And with that, the giant stepped out and left him alone. Himuro did forgot to close the bathroom door but still he thought people were polite and ask things after he steped out of if. But no, not this individual. This one just went straight to him and scared him from behind.

Sighing deeply, he stepped out as well and followed the giant into the kitchen where he found him sitting on a chair and drinking water from a glass. This guy really had no manners... Himuro smiled lightly and grabbed a glass as well to fill it with water. 

"You're really a heavy sleeper."  
"Ah yeah, I sleep like a dead."

Normally, Himuro would say the same, but not when he was sleeping with someone in his bed. Damn, he hated smalltalk even more when there was a human being, still in his own world and maybe just not giving a damn about thinking and replying. But why had he be the one to talk? Ah yeah, uncomfortable silence that is. Drinking his water quietly and trying to wake up decently, Himuro just looked outside.

"You even sleep with that thing around your neck?" Murasakibara suddenly mentioned and pointed at the necklace with the ring that Himuro got because of Kagami. Surprised by that question he nodded slowly. "It's precious to me."  
"Hmm..." Nodding in reply the bigger male just titled his had as if the answer didn't satisfy him.

Escaping this conversation, Himuro stood up quickly and went to the cupboard, turning his head to the side while speaking. "I heard you mumbling that you're hungry, what can I offer you? I have some cereals, uh toast or would you prefer something sweet?"

By mentioning sweet, Himuro had to grin but hid it as Murasakibara's head turned to him. "Something sweet? That's always a good option." While Himuro was checking his supply, Atsushi just leant back and observed his smaller team player and his eyes focused on the stature before him. Scanning the form from head to toe as this one turned around with a jar in his hand. 

His eyes now on the jar, he blinked and titled his head almost like dog. "What's that?" Sitting across Atsushi, Himuro placed the jar in front of him and smeared him a toast with the brown thick content. "That's Nutella. I don't know if Japan has this kind of thing, too?"

He shoved the plate to Atsushi who ogled the thing. Taking it with his hand and slowly eating it, he licked his lips. "Hmm..yeah It's been a while since I ate this. It's good!" He said while smiling like a pleased kid, making Himuro grin as well. They sat like this for a while, enjoying more or less the silence.

"So, what do you want to do today?" Atsushi asked him after licking his fingers clean and Himuro had to grin even more as he saw the face of his team mate. Almost everywhere around his mouth was chocolate and it just looked so ridiciouls. Handing him a tissue, Himuro shrugged. "I wanted to visit the town, maybe looking for new places."

"Can I join you?"  
"Yeah, of course." 

Why was he always so fast with his mouth? So it's been sattled. Another day with this giant, what would it bring? He watched Atsushi cleaning his face and chuckled lightly as this one just couldn't get it right. As purple eyes looked into the grey one, Himuro pointed at his face where Atsushi still left some chocolate. He heard him groaning and bend over the table to help him. He took the tissue out of the big hand and rubbed the leftovers away. 

"Do you wanna make yourself ready, or do you want to go home first?" He asked while Atsushi left him rubbing the corner of his mouth. It looked as if the Miracle member didn't think about this and had to admit, he needed to change.  
"Ah yeah, right. Wanna come with me?" There was a moment of silence which made the question sound more awkward than intendet. "Y-yeah, why not!" Himuro quickly added.

And with this, they walked from Himuro's place all the way down to the other end of the city, where Atsushi lived. Himuro couldn't believe it when he saw the giant house of his team mate. Murasakibara just yawned and went ahead while fumbling his keys out of his pocket. With a little come-hither movement with his hand, he signalized Himuro to follow him. Not knowing any better, he just walked after the giant like a shadow, the stairs up to his room. 

He had no clue what to expect as he saw the giant room which was somehow neatly and yet somehow disorderly. Maybe it was because of all the candy papers on the ground? It still looked very comfortable, even more with the big window that offered a nice view to the a lake and the big city behind it. It was a whole new view than Himuro had in his own flat. He imagined it during the night and almost forgot that Atsushi was behind him, already changing.

As he turned around, he saw the hard muscled back and shouldn't be surprised about it, because he saw this every time the had practice. But still, he couldn't help and stare at this amazing body. Turning his head away, because he didn't want to look like a creep, he waited patiently as the big boy got dressed.

"One day I'm going to invite you to my place." Atsushi said while struggling with his pants. His long fingers trembled impatient with the small button. Himuro watched him as he stood in the corner. Should he? After some minutes, where Astushi still was wrestling with it, Himuro sighed through his nose and stepped close to him. 

"Let me...help you." He said almost too quietly. If someone of his family would come in right now, they sure would guess things.   
He pulled on the fabric and pushed the button through the hole. This guy really was something. "Ah, thanks." Himuro coughed and looked up only to find an intense stare from above.

"Should we?" Atsushi asked as Himuro avoided the gaze. They walked down the stairs and out of the house. 

"Woah, it's really big." Himuro said after a while. "So much room. Do you have siblings?"  
"Yeah 3 older brothers and one older sister, but they all moved out long ago. Sometimes they visit us."

Woah, 4 more of those giants? He couldn't imagine how his siblings would look like. He just had Atsushi's face in front of him and chuckled imagining them all looking alike. "What is it?" 

"Eh..nothing. I was just...thinking." Himuro smiled as they walked past a candy shop. He looked to the big boy and expect him to stop. And just like he thought, the purple head couldn't past it without stopping. "Muro-chin, you can go on, I'll be right back."

Himuro nodded as the Miracle member went into the small shop. He walked around the corner, slowly to give him more time. As he walked, he heard from afar, loud noises, cheering voices and the familiar noise of a ball hitting the ground. Following the sounds, he ended up in front of a street basketball court. 

It has been a while that he played outside the hall. His eyes observed the lively scene of groups, chatting with each other and throwing the ball. It has really been a long time, since he played outside like in America with Taiga.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> maybe you think, are they gay for each other? So I have to tell you, yeah, they are hella gay for each other! Stay tuned for more jealousy and soon some kinky frick-frack! 
> 
> thanks for reading!


	5. Nostalgia and Presence

How did it end up like this again? Moments ago, Himuro has been left alone to walk slowly ahead and that's when he found the street basketball court. As Atsushi still wasn't back after 15 min, why couldn't he get some amusement?

He played in a shorthanded group and helped them to give their rivals a dramatic defeat. It felt really good playing like this again, under the sky and hearing joyful people around him. There was still one thing that bothered him, why was his purple-head giant still not here?

As the match was over, Himuro felt pretty good as he saw the results. He felt like this was a nice warm up before he would challenge other players again. Provided, that he would be able to play one match more before Atsushi would finally come. Or maybe the giant could play with him? 

He knew that Atsushi always grumbled when they were playing and even practicing, but Himuro remembered that one time, when he saw that one special side of his team mate. That one side when Atsushi was angry about something but didn't want to tell the others and dashed forward to grab the ball and slam dunk it with such a power.

Knowing that Atsushi was a Miracle member, meant that he had his special abilities as well and Himuro always wanted to see him in the so called "zone". But the giant said, he dislikes basketball, so was he even able to enter the zone? Giving 100% and even beyond that, being in a daze and completely activating his instincts just to follow the ball.

Himuro never experienced it, but he often heard about it and could only imagine how it would be. However, being able to see a tiny bit of Muraskaibara's power was a thing, Himuro couldn't get enough. Seeing those enormous muscles, flex in his movements was a damn pretty sight along with his purple hair that flew around his handsome face.

He had shaken his head after thinking too much about that guy and turned around, just to look at a familiar face. However, meeting Kagami after his match, was a big surprise. Crimson eyes stared at him and Himuro just took a millisecond to catch himself again. Sooner or later he would meet Kagami, or as he loved to say, his little brother.

He greeted him by speaking Englisch as a reflex and smiled inwardly hearing Kagami's voice. Speaking a second language was always handy, when there were so many people around you who don't need to know what they are talking about, even if it was only a banal greeting.

Of course, Kagami would still see him as an a clinical person, but what could Himuro do? Smiling softly in response, he needed to say that it was his nature of showing emotions like this. There was a strange tension between them. It wasn't aggression, but an odd feeling from both sides. As if they should say things to each other that were much more meaningful. 

And now, maybe was a good time to continue where they stopped? Feeling a little bit rude, Himuro greeted Kagami's friends in the language everybody understands. Seeing that Kagami had found good friends and a proper team gave him a warm feeling.

As he looked into Kagami's frowned face, he knew that the redhead wasn't satisfied at all that he left him. As they both stared at each other again, someone suddenly interrupted the tension, by punching Kagami in his side. A small guy with light blue hair just like his eyes that stared at the big male, almost without expression. And Kagami was calling him a poker-face....

"You're irritating me, Kagami-kun. Stop being indecisive."  
"Why you litte!"

The raven haired boy watched them argue like an old couple and his eye wandered to the small male that just sneaked up on them like that. It made him furrow his brow for a moment that he didn't notice him earlier. Having such a bright hair color and yet the ability to, or the nature of having a weak presence.

"Excuse me, but who are you?" He suddenly remembered that Yosen was talking about the other members of the generation of miracles in the locker room and how twisted every single one was. He heard something about light blue hair and how everyone forgets about him so easily.

The guy, who introduced himself as Kuroko Tetsuya blinked at him, obviously he wasn't surprised that Himuro overlooked him. The Yosen member chuckled over his name that sounded similar to his own. Kagami somehow felt nostalgic and even a bit sentimental as he told Kuroko about their past, which he didn't have to, but well.

Listening to them as they parsed Kagami's behavior that he lost the last game intentionally, Kuroko had some good advice for the redhead. Kagami knew that it was false and Himuro knew exactly why he did it and yet, both weren't happy about it.

He left Kagami with a punch in his face and a straight declaration. But Taiga shouldn't forget that Himuro was pretty angry as well during their important match when he faked his loss. Knowing that it hurt his little brother just to end their relationship like this, Taiga wouldn't want to win against him. But the thing he did back then, was unacceptable and he knew it.

As he looked into those crimson eyes, he remembered the punch in Kagami's face years ago. By making this guy his little brother, Himuro felt like he had some kind of authority. He taught him to play basketball and it was him, who looked after this guy all the time when they were together. The glare he got now, was filled with curiosity and mostly, insecurity.

Himuro wasn't surprised about this. For him, there was a time when he realized, he couldn't teach Kagami anything new anymore than the things he already knew. He felt like his authority was slipping and that he hadn't the right to call himself, the big brother anymore. Their head-on-head strength showed only, that one had to be better than the other one.

It couldn't continue like this anymore, that's when Himuro made it clear for Kagami. He needed to surpass his little brother by a huge gab or he let him overcome him, but that would just mean, he wouldn't be able to call himself like this anymore. Where would his authority go? His role model to be, the stronger one? 

He couldn't let this be. If this would happen, he just wouldn't be able to be the big bro anymore. That's why he needed to cut off his bond with Kagami. Besides, Himuro had his own little issue, not letting people too close to him.

Just as they got ready, looking each other dead in the eye, someone interrupted them a second time. As both looked up, different expressions were to recognize. Kagami and the rest of his team were just astounded at the height while Himuro just let out a quick breath.

However, Kuroko just glared at the big male with a knowing look in his eyes. Muraskibara took the basketball that flew in the air seconds ago and turned around to the smaller male, bending down to him as if he was a child. "My my Kuro-chin!" He sounded happy seeing him, or rather amused. "You look dead serious as always. Makes me want to crush you...."

He reached his long arm out and ruffled the ice blue hair with his giant hand. "Heh, just kidding." Feeling offended, Kuroko slapped the hand away. "Please stop that, Murasakibara-kun." Observing the two, Himuro noticed Atushi's childlike behavior turned on again.

Of what avail was it, replaying the morning accident over and over again as he was now sitting on Murasakibara's bed while the other one was grumbling in the kitchen. He just could smile a bit over the fact that his teammate ripped Kagami's upper eyebrows off.

And even if Atsushi told him they weren't allowed to play matches on the streets like that, Himuro still managed it, to overcome him for a game. But as soon as the match had started, the sudden rain just washed their opportunity away.

Later then, it was Murasakibara who pushed Himuro to the exit, not wanting to listen to Kagami's childish attacks anymore. It was a strange feeling as they walked quickly the way back to his big house. Entering, Atsushi quickly grabbed a towel and gave it to his small friend.

Since they walked back, Atsushi somehow changed. He didn't eat his candy, just murmuring something and walking fast. Himuro could think it over and over again if he had said something bad or if Kagami was annoying him that much? He had no idea which is why he was sitting quietly on the comfy bed and drying himself with the given towel.

"You shouldn't frown like that, Muro-chin or it will stay like this forever."

He didn't notice him and looked up, only to see a topless Murasakibara in the doorway. Not wanting to stare too much, he just shook his head lightly and started to rub his wet hair. 

"Ah, I was just thinking...!"

He heard footsteps coming closer and suddenly a shadow hovering over him. Feeling the pressure from above, he didn't dare to look up, but Atsushi forced him anyway, by grabbing his chin.

"Does this baka did something to you?"

Being surprised over those words, Himuro just opened his mouth and didn't know exactly what to say. Ah, okay he didn't was there when they met and Kagami told his friends about their past so he can't know about this.

"I have seen that he has the same ring on his necklace, just like you Muro-chin. Did he hurt hurt you?"

"No..." The towel slid down on his neck and Himuro just shook his black hair. "He's something like...a little brother to me, why are you asking this all of a sudden?"

As his gray eye looked into violet ones, Atsushi just tilted his head, trying to read him with his stare as his wet hair fell into his face, almost tickling Himuro's cheeks. 

"I don't know...somehow you two were staring so strangely at each other."

Was this guy suggesting the thing, Himuro was thinking about? He blinked and noticed that the face from above was dangerously close to his. Was he examining him or what?

He could feel the warmth of the skin and couldn't help but to avoid his gaze. He didn't want to talk about Kagami and himself and what they two have a business to clarify.

"It's nothing, you don't have to worry."

Himuro slowly came closer to Atsushi and thought the other one would understand to make him some room, but no the giant was still in his place and now it got awkward as they were so close to each other.

"Do you mind?"

His voice sounded weaker than he intended and Atsushi didn't move at first, but after some moments he slowly backed off. That's when Himuro could breath again.

He didn't like how the tension was now between them and he didn't want to tell some unnecessary things. "Thanks for the towel, I guess I'll be heading home then."

He saw Atsushi's stunned face and somehow felt the need to explain his escape. "I need to take a shower and clean the floor or else the old lady will get mad at me."

He quickly added, put the towel into Atushi's hand, bowed quickly down and walked slowly, not to show any sign of panic, out of the door. Atsushi didn't follow him, why should he?

He cursed himself for his behavior and yet was angry at the purple haired male. Why did he feel the need to ask him about something like this? And why does Himuro had to react this way? It was a banal thing that shouldn't have to turn out like this and yet it happened.

Maybe being so many hours together got on the giants nerves or something? It was a quick change of behavior that couldn't be unnoticed. Not when his usual routine was, eating candy, walking slowly and having a face that would say, I don't give a fuck about anything.

But as soon as they left the court, he actually pushed him to leave the other behind and than walked ahead of him. What kind of behavior was that? Was he angry? Was he annoyed? Was he hungry? 

Himuro just shook his head as he walked to his own apartment, walking the stairs up and quickly through the doors. It was pathetic to think so much about such a small thing.

It wasn't his fault and yet it bothered him somehow. Maybe this was another lesson not to let himself be drawn to another person too much. Even if it was just a platonic friendship or maybe an admiration?

However, as he stepped in to the shower he made it clear to avoid the candy man for some time and clear his own head. It couldn't be that this guy managed to break his cool facade just like this and making him into a stuttering mess.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> so, ehem yeah what the heck was that? The tension is slowly rising up just as the itching of my fingers to write the first smut scene *wiggles eyebrows* 
> 
> thanks for reading!


	6. Gotcha!

Walking through the streets of the city, Himuro held his camera ready, taking pictures of places he had been before. Thanks to Murasakibara's guiding the other day, he sure shouldn't get lost so easily. Now that he was alone, he could look at the little details here and there, observing people and thinking of how beautiful the city looked. Without feeling the pressure of someone next to him, or the awkward need to say something.

With bright colors of the sunshine and cherry blossom tree patels on the streets, it really gave him the feeling of something warm, maybe of spring even if it wasn’t the right season. Inhaling the dry and cool air, Himuro let the sunshine warm his skin and walked slowly ahead, up the stairs of a high bridge. 

It has been two weeks now, since that small and strange accident. He met Kagami after a long time and was happy to be able to settle things finally, but the weather decided to cancel it. And then there was this odd feeling he felt from Murasakibara as they walked rather quickly to the giant's house.

Since that moment, Himuro didn't know any better than avoiding him at all costs. He wasn't bad at reading people's minds, but the mind of that purple haired guy was surely something he still worked on to read. To everyone who would observe Murasakibara more than 5 min, they would simply say that this guy was a lazy human being with an arrogant attitude and a hobby like Willy Wonka. 

But Himuro knew, there was more lying underneath that facade even if it was hard to believe. From the moment he spent the next day with Atsushi, after they somehow landed together on Himuro'S bed, the raven haired boy knew it that being too long with someone, wasn't healthy for him.

Sooner or later, he would feel the pressure and how his endurance would sink. He wasn't able having someone by his side for a long time. His family was an exception, even if he still had his moment where he just would walk away to find a place full of refreshing peace. 

But as he was thinking about it, he noticed that this feeling didn't occur. There was just the nervousness and the feeling of the unknown of what would they do next? It came from Atsushi' side. That pressure he felt as the big boy leant over him, their faces being inches apart as he felt those purple bangs on his cheeks. He even could see Atsushi's pupils widen as he looked at him with that intense stare.

Himuro was glad back then that he was already sitting or else this stare would make his legs wobble. Was this guy angry at him? Or really pissed? It just gave him a feeling that the Miracle member had something on his mind, something he would like to tell but didn't dare to. Even at school, he rushed past the giant and did his best not to have any unnecessary involving with him.   
As he walked up the stairs and reached into the middle of the bridge, he gazed over the beautiful view. A wide lake, flowing in the direction he was looking, just though the big forest with all those Sakura trees. He had no idea how this place was called, but he walked with Atsushi over the bridge quickly to catch their train. Now he had the time to gaze into the beauty of nature that looked like a painting from the world's best artist. 

With a small smile on his lips, he took his camera and captured the moment where the sun brightened the scene. It was really beautiful and gave him a satisfaction of calmness and even solitude. If he just had someone he could enjoy this with. His family was too far away, just like Alex. And Kagami? Well, who knows what was with this guy, if he hated him now or if he still was thinking about nostalgic things? And what was he thinking? After all, it was Himuro's decision to cut off his bonds with him, so why was he pondering about his childhood friend now? Yeah, it wasn't easy, being like this. Wanting to have someone so badly by your side that even your beloved solitude threatens you and yet being scared of too much… love? Maybe love wasn't the right thing to say. It was the fear that someone couldn't handle him for the time they would be together and might just leave.

So Himuro decided to cut off bonds with everyone who would get too close to him, or just kept shallow connection that doesn't need to make too much effort but still would be valuable. Once he thought of getting closer to Atsushi and eating snacks with him in the donut shop, he thought it would be a challenge to discover what was lying under the giant's surface. Besides, it wasn’t a bad idea to get along with your teammates, especially him. 

But who would have guessed that he caught himself slowly getting a crush on him? Shaking his head, Himuro took a last glance at the picture and walked the way down the path that led to the train station. It's really not easy to find someone who can stand by your side, being quiet and still not making you uncomfortable. 

Someone who would be by your side whenever you need them and you would know that this person would always be by your side and still give you your latitude. Himuro had so much love inside of him which he would like to give someone to make him stronger and the feeling of home. Since his mother was living in America, he couldn't be there for her like he was before he decided to travel to Japan. Now he was alone, waiting and searching for the right person. 

He had some flirts since he was back in Japan, but there was nothing behind them. Those were only playful gestures and polite smiles, nothing more. He still hadn’t found the right person that would be worth to show him his full attention.   
And as he was thinking about a person, a familiar feature was right ahead of him. In the corner of the train station, far away from all the people, standing all alone, leaning against the stone wall.

Himuro’s heart made a jump as he saw the unusual hair color and the big familiar frame. Automatically, he slowed down and sneaked between more people to submerge in the crowd. In thos short weeks, Murasakibara came once to train with the team and thankfully, the coach didn’t pair them together. 

They played like they usually did, with the exception that Himuro did everything to avoid getting a pass from him, or passing the ball to him. Wasn’t that childish? Yeah, it was but he was confused and he knew he couldn’t play like this. The coach, however didn’t say a word. Maybe she was too distracted by Kenichi and his whining that Kensuke and Wei Lu made too much fun of him.   
Walking with the crowd, he looked around to look at the table, still trying to hide himself. He never liked the big crowd, but now it was the only chance to remain undetected. They walked slowly into the train, inch by inch, that even the temperature was rising slightly. 

Was it worth it, to hide in a crowd full of people just to be unseen by him? Yeah, maybe, because if this guy would step to him with one move and confront him, he had no idea what to answer. Did he even notice he was avoiding him? Or was he just so angry about something that he doesn’t even pay attention to his actions? 

He didn’t dare to turn his head now to see if he was still in the corner, but as he turned around, he noticed the purple head in the same train, only some seats from him. This guy must have taken the other doors and Himuro didn’t catch this, because he was too busy pondering about small things. 

Turning his head to the other side, he pushed himself deeper into the crowd and remained like this, staring out of the window as the train started to move. He only could shake his head about being like this. Walking away like a coward, it really started to get on his nerves. 

He never really was a scaredy-cat. There had been harder times where he indeed felt fear, but due to his special ability, called acting and remaining cool, he just did things without thinking if he could do them or not. He simply did them.  
But dealing with people, especially someone like Murasakibara was troublesome and yet he enjoyed it. It was a strange mix and whenever he thought the Yosen ace was too much work, he actually liked it having him around. But now, he just wanted to find a hole and push himself into that. 

At the first station, some people left his side and made it easier to let him be discovered. That’s why he sat down next to an old lady from which he could observe the Miracle member. He would probably laugh over himself for doing such a fuss now, if he would be home alone. 

Murasakibara was gazing out of the window, not eating, and even his hands were empty. Yes, he had a handsome face even with all the bangs hanging and covering half of it. In that millisecond, he could see the head turning and quickly looked away. Maybe it was for the best to dismount one station earlier. 

He stood up and walked quickly to the door, reaching his hand out to push the button as someone was quicker. Turning his head to the person next to him, he froze immediately. When did he-?

“Ah, Muro-chin.” He began slowly in a tone that Himuro didn’t hear before. “I didn’t see you were here as well.” Slowly taking his arm back, he lowered his head to look at the boy. This one just stared at him for a brief moment and couldn’t believe how this was possible that he was right beside him. 

“Hello, Atsushi.” Himuro addressed him with a small smile to overplay his nervousness. “I was in thoughts and I haven’t seen you either. Even though, you always stand out.” He hoped he didn’t sound insulting.   
With a loud PLING, the doors opened and both stepped out, walking slowly towards the escalator. What now? This was the situation Himuro avoided at all costs. He had no idea what to say or what to ask. Or should he just act like he usually did, as if nothing happened? 

“So uhm, what are you doing here?” Himuro started as they were still walking side by side. “I was bored so I came here.” A simple answer and yet it gave him latitude to think more about it. “I see.”  
“And you?” Feeling that the bigger form next to him bent a little over him to look at what he was holding in his hands, Atsushi noticed the camera. “I was just walking around, taking pictures I want to show my family. I don’t know for how long I will be here.”

Even though he managed to get the job at the donut shop, he still needed another job to pay the flat. Living in Japan sure was expensive.   
The other boy nodded and kept his stare on the smaller male, observing him from head to toe. Himuro could feel the gaze ghosting over him and it made him uncomfortable, even more uneasy. “ “Please don’t do that.”

“Huh?”  
“Please stop staring at me like this.”

They reached the top of the stairs, at which they parted days ago, only to walk together to Himuro’s flat. Atsushi’s house would be in the other direction. Right now, Himuro wasn’t really looking at his team mate. Instead, he stared into the stomach that was right in front of him. 

“I need to go now.” He added a smile and was about to turn around as he felt a pair of hands on his waist. Being startled, he has been heaved over one shoulder of that broad muscle building. “Eh? What are you doing?” He didn’t want to sound too freaked out but clung his hands on the back of Atsushi.

“To be honest, I got the feeling that Muro-chin is avoiding me.”  
Himuro swallowed hard. “W-why do you think that? Please let me down!”  
“Don’t wanna.”  
“Huh?”

Atushi began to walk and Himuro could only see how his apartment seemed to get smaller and smaller with each step. He was walking in the wrong direction! Gently punching him into his back, he started to wiggle but a strong hand kept him in place.   
“Hey, what are you doing? My flat is that way!”  
“I know that, but I wanna talk with you.”

He has been caught off guard by that sentence and looked over his shoulder but still couldn’t see the others face. If he wanted to talk he could just say so and not kidnap him like that! It was not that he had something important to do but being caught by him, was not a thing he had planned.

“Uh… and where are we going?”   
“My place.” 

For someone who wanted to talk, this guy sure could use more words. Maybe he knew that if he had asked Himuro to come to his place, Himuro would refuse. All the way down to his house, Atsushi wasn’t talking and Himuro was almost hanging down on his back like a dead body. Even his stomach started to hurt as it rubbed on Atsushi’s hard shoulder. 

People were staring at them and even some kinds wondered what they were doing. Soon they were surrounded by midgets that stared at them with curiosity. “Oi, big Onii-chan what are you doing?” A little boy asked as he tugged on Murasakibara’s sleeve. Purple eyes looked down on him and Himuro had to admit that those kids were brave.  
“I’m going to eat him.”

The kids covered their mouths as they looked at Himuro. This little girl that was observing him hanging there had to stretch her neck to speak to him. “Is that true?! Can’t you run away?” Himuro had to suppress a chuckle as he saw the fear in her eyes.   
Atsushi really knew how to scare little children, not only with his appearance but with his words as well. “But he doesn’t even taste good!” The girl yelled and punched him with her tiny fist. Murasakibara smirked and turned his head over his free shoulder to look at her.

“He was running away from me, so he needs to get punished.” Himuro’s eyes widened and something inside of him was telling him to kick Atsushi as hard as he could and ran away back to America. So this guy had noticed his actions after all…   
“What? Like with a ruler?” The other boy asked and a big question mark appeared on his face. Himuro couldn’t help but think of something perverted even if a kid was saying this. “Yup.”

“Atsushi!” Himuro warned him and punched him on his back. He looked at the girl down and smiled at her. “Don’t worry I’ll be okay. I’m not weak you know and besides, I can wrestle with him.”

Their faces lit up and they made their hands into fists. “Really? Go give it to the big meanie!” Atsushi let out a small noise of amusement as the kids had been called by their parents, winking at him and showing him their thumbs. . “Muro-chin is good with kids, huh?”

“Unlike you.” Himuro chuckled. “At least they didn’t run away from the first time they saw you.” He mumbled. “Some kids don’t fear me, sadly.” Atsushi added and fumbled something out of his pocket as he approached the doors of his house.   
The raven haired boy heard the keys and felt how Murasakibara had to bend a little to fit under the frame. He closed the door after him and carried Himuro upstairs to his room. This one looked around and wondered if someone was home and if that someone would have thought something strange seeing them like this.

Feeling those strong hands around his waist again, he had been pushed down on the big comfy bed with a soft sound. He didn’t had the time to gather himself as Atsushi hovered over him, capturing him.

“You kidnapped me, Atsushi. That’s not nice.”  
“You’re not nice either.”  
“You wanted to talk, right? You could have just asked me to come to a café or something. This way, you could even buy something sweet for yourself.”  
“That wouldn’t work, because Muro-chin would say no. I know you’re avoiding me. I can feel that.”

So much pressure came from the boy’s heat above, down on him and pressing him to the bed. There was a look on the bigger male’s face, Himuro found astounding. He had his brows slightly furrowed and his lips pressed together, almost in a pout. He looked like a kicked puppy and Himuro would love to reach out and caress his cheek to soften his expression.  
“It’s too noisy inside my head to go outside with you and talk in a café. I’m confused and angry and I don’t understand even why. I can’t even enjoy my candy. Muro-chin what have you done!”

Himuro’s eyes widened. This guy was confused? Himuro was like this as well and had no idea why. Murasakibara started to act strange since the last two weeks and he was putting the blame on Himuro. 

This guy even couldn’t eat his candy in a normal manner so this had to be something serious but why should Himuro know this? He opened his mouth to say something but couldn’t think of any smart words.   
“Since Muro-chin is with me, I can’t concentrate anymore. I have so many strange thoughts! What have you done? I will really crush you!”

“Woah woah wait! I-I don’t know what you mean!”  
Atsushi leant down, their faces only inches apart and Himuro’s heartbeat rose almost painfully. He could smell the unique scent of his teammate and felt again those long bangs on his face. Looking into purple eyes that were demanding answers out of him he couldn’t offer. 

He avoided the gaze and placed his arms on those strong biceps, pushing him a little bit. He could feel the heat as his face got slightly red and didn’t dare to look at the boy above him now. “I’m confused as well you know…” he swallowed, not knowing why he opened his mouth at all. “I thought you were acting strange and so I thought I should give you some space…”

He surely never had planned to get into this situation and as always, life had other plans. He was edgy and yet a part of him liked this closeness to the other male. Atsushi titled his head and frowned and as Himuro glanced at him, he chuckled softly.  
“Why are you laughing?” He sounded more whiney than annoyed but the expression he made was just amusing. Like a little kid that couldn’t solve a math problem and got frustrated about it. “I’m sorry, but seeing this side of you surprised me.”   
“It’s not funny…I really don’t get it…and besides.” He grabbed Himuro by his chin, forcing him to look into his eyes. “I saw a certain color on your cheeks…that’s a rare side as well.”

Himuro stopped smiling and looked again into purple eyes that sent out something warm. He couldn’t help but stare for a while without thinking, without talking. Slowly those eyes came closer and closer until Himuro couldn’t see anything anymore.  
He closed his own eyes as Murasakibara placed his lips on the male underneath him, slowly massaging them with his own and feeling the soft skin. By now, Himuro let out a small sigh and shyly kissed him back until he realized what was happening.

Pushing on the big muscled chest, he turned his head to the side, catching air as Atsushi licked his lips and observed him. “What was that?” Himuro asked in a whisper. “I don’t know, but it tasted nice and I somehow felt at ease. What about you Muro-chin?”  
Himuro’s heart felt like it was about to burst out of his chest while looking into those beautiful purple eyes that had a longing inside of them. “Can we do it again?” Without waiting for an answer he lowered his head again and captured Himuro’s mouth with his own.

His hands slid under his back, pushing him closer to himself as he knelt before the bed, right between Himuro’s legs. The older male just let him do and felt the warmth that came from his touch. Was he enjoying this? Despite having his fear deep inside of him, he didn’t want to let go now and wrapped his arms around Atsushi’s neck. It felt so nice being like this and it was just like his friend said, he felt at ease. 

A wet tongue from above licked over his lips, asking for entrance and slowly slid in as he opened his mouth to let the intruder explore. He couldn’t believe that this was the Yosen ace which made him feel like he was about to melt. 

Rubbing his tongue softly at the owner’s, Murasakibara gave himself the time to explore and taste Himuro’s mouth until this one was already gasping for air. The hands on his back slowly traveled lower and under the fabric of his black pullover to touch his skin. He felt goose pumps and shivered slightly. The mouth left him and moved to his jaw line, nibbling softly and going down to his neck. Licking the skin and sucking lightly on it, making Himuro gasp. His neck was his sensitive spot and Atsushi automatically pressed every button that would melt him. 

He wanted to touch the male above him, too and trailed his fingertips on his chest which made the purple head stop. He looked at his teammate and Himuro used this chance to put his hands under the other male’s dark grey pullover, feeling the abs and the soft skin. 

They looked at each other with hazy eyes and Tatsuya knew, this was getting dangerous and still he didn’t want to stop. He pushed himself up to the height from above and nipped on the other male’s lips who quickly grabbed him.  
In a swift motion Murasakibara managed to sit on the bed and Himuro now was sitting on his lap. Their hands were buried under each other’s clothes as their mouths were glued to together. Soon Himuro could feel something poking him from underneath and he shuddered at thinking how big Murasakibara was.

He felt getting it tight in his pants as well but he surely didn’t thought about doing it now. He never knew that this guy could kiss. It felt so good that he was getting hotter and hotter and as much as he tried to hold back, he could feel loosing. It was troublesome. 

“Muro-chin…” He breathed out during their kiss, pushing him closer and grasping his fingers over his nipples. This one inhaled the air sharply but didn’t want to make a sound and bit quickly on his lower lip. 

“Yes, Atsushi?”  
“Are you gonna stay the night?”   
“I don’t know…I think I should go…”

Atsushi pressed the body of his teammate close to his and buried his face into his neck. “You always seem to run away from me…please stay.” He put his hands on Himuro’s bottom and pressed him down, eliciting a gasp and made an exquisite friction. “I want to taste you.” He whispered into his ear and he bit his neck. “Can I?” 

Fear was slowly rising inside of him as he was thinking about those words and he had no idea what his team mate was talking about. He just knew that letting himself fall was not an easy thing for him to do. On the contrary, he never did it for anybody.   
He swallowed and took a deep breath, while pushing himself away from the other male to look at him. He saw curiosity mixed with a sad tone in those eyes. “What do you mean? I…don’t know. I-” He had been cut off as the Yosen ace licked his lower lip and touched his nose with his. 

“Please, Muro-chin, stay here. I won’t do anything bad.”  
Himuro chuckled lightly. “I won’t allow you to do anything bad but if you want to have a blue eye, I can help it.”  
Atsushi raised an eyebrow and leant back on his elbows. “You think you can fight me?” An amused smile appeared on his lips which went over to Himuro as he leant forwards, placing his hands on the other boy’s chest lightly. “You’re underestimating me.”  
“Since Muro-chin is always so quiet and polite, yeah maybe I do.”

He wrapped his arms around Himuro’s back and pushed him down, managing to let the raven head lying on his chest. He could hear his heartbeat that soothed his own and sighed quietly. What was he about to do with this guy? Such a problem child and yet, he liked it way too much for his own good.

“I’m really hungry, so can I?”  
Returning back to the question, Himuro was still confused and raised his head to give Murasakibara a sign that he had no idea what he meant. The Miracle member kept his stare and slowly pushed his hand between their bodies to grab Himuro’s groin gently. “Here.” The movement startled Tatsuya and he jerked involuntarily forward, his eye widened as he got it now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *gasp* will they do the frickle-frackle? naaaah not this time, but something else!
> 
> (p.s I'm going to try to show another side of mukkun. I think he and Himuro are the hardest characers to write, oh yeah as well as Akashi!)
> 
> thanks for reading!


	7. Taste

Himuro blinked at the boy’s patient features. His hand was still down there, resting and waiting. There was no sign of a joke, but Himuro couldn’t help and widen his eyes. But still, thinking that this guy was hungry and then referring to his groin was kinda strange. 

“Um… didn’t you want to talk? Besides, we can go eat something.”  
Atsushi titled his head without losing his gaze. He got it now that Himuro wanted to run away from him again. Maybe he was too pushy? But the Miracle member just couldn’t let go of him. Not now when he had him in his arms and on his lap, even reacting to his touches.

“I do, but first I want to taste Muro-chin.”  
He grabbed Himuro’s waist and turned their position so that the raven haired boy was on his back and Atsushi leaned over his lower body. With his knees on the ground, he bent over the smaller body and shoved the shirt up just to reveal a hard stomach.  
Instinctively, Himuro held his wrists with his hands to stop him from undressing as he tried to remain cool. Atsushi glanced at him for a moment and lowered his head to nuzzle the soft skin. His violet hair tickled and he shivered, not knowing if he should push him away or not. 

Atsushi however, inhaled the boy’s scent while shoving his pants a little down just to reveal fine black hair that disappeared into his dark gray boxer shorts. The bigger male’s eyes roamed over the bit of revealed skin and noticed how pale his team mate was. 

He really didn’t want to hurt or scare Himuro, but he was so eager that he for sure wouldn’t let him go now. Looking up at Himuro’s concentrated face, he hooked his fingers on each side of Himuro’s waistband and slowly pulled it down while observing him.

Settling his hands on his place, he moved his upper body to lean closer to the other’s face, giving him a soft and passionate kiss which Himuro replied to. “I want to spoil you rotten.” It was a whisper, ghosting over his lips right into his mouth down to his heart. Hearing this voice instead of his usual childish tone, made Himuro wonder if this here was still the same person.  
He fought with himself as he felt vulnerable towards the giant, lying like this and he even waned more, but those words and the look on his face gave him the feeling that he really didn’t want to hurt him. And Himuro had to believe him even if a small voice inside his head was buzzing. He sighed and nodded.

Atsushi immediately gave him a warm smile and shoved the shirt up just to find two rosy nipples. Meanwhile, his hand grabbed Himuro’s groin to massage it as he covered the left nipple with his mouth and elicited a quiet gasp that went straight to his groin.

He wanted to hear more lovely sounds coming out of this mouth and licked the nub slowly in sync with his moving hand. Feeling the body underneath him responding to his touches, he closed his eyes and focused on the boy’s taste and scent. Himuro’s hands buried themselves in those velvety purple strains as he felt the wet tongue on his skin.

Atsushi was moving slowly, almost lazily as if he was about to snooze. But all Himuro could think about now was how nice it felt and how much he had to restrain himself to not make some obscene sounds. This would be difficult because Murasakibara pulled his pants down, leaving them pooled around his knees, making his manhood feel the cold air. 

Being half naked in front of his team mate and being scanned by his eyes made him feel even more vulnerable. He could see the hunger in Atsushi’s eyes and wondered if this guy meant it real when he was talking about tasting him. The slightest thought of cannibalism has been shoved away as Atsushi grabbed his knees and placed his face to his half standing member.  
Feeling like his head turned red, he couldn’t stand being looked at like this. “I would appreciate it if you wouldn’t look too much.” Atsushi’s head turned up to look into his flushed face. “Why? Muro-chin is really pretty…even down here.”

The raven haired boy rested on his elbows and furrowed his brows slightly after hearing the compliment. Being called “pretty”, wasn’t that a word for a woman? And still, he could sense the sincere words. He wanted to close his legs, but Atsushi just spread them to nuzzle his inner thigh and kissing the skin.  
“You smell nice…” 

Himuro swallowed, but couldn’t answer right now. Everything inside of him was trembling with curiosity. His team mate wasn’t joking when he spoke about tasting him, because his mouth were still ghosting over his stomach, up to his nubs and back down to his lower half.

And then, Murasakibara blew his warm breath carefully over the tip before he used his tongue to give it a long lick, making Himuro arch his back along the movement. Accidentally, he let out a surprised tone and bit his lower lip quickly.  
Atsushi smiled weakly and took the tip into his mouth, sucking on it and letting his tongue circle around the head. The taste was sweet yet manly and he even could taste his liquid as it leaked out of the slit. Letting out a low hum, he let it vibrate around Himuro’s member.

Right as Himuro opened his eyes again to look down at the violet head between his legs, he observed how Atsushi used his big mouth to take the whole manhood in. “Hng-!” It took all his power not to thrust his waist up and push the head deeper into the wet cavern and all he could do was burying his fingers into Atsushi’s hair.

This one closed his eyes as his nose hit the fine black hair and he took his time to explore everything that was now inside of his mouth. He used a healthy dose of saliva to slick it up even more and started to bob his head up and down, making his smaller friend gasp.

This wasn’t enough for him. He wanted to hear him louder and see a face that Himuro would only show to him. As he licked and sucked his mind wandered to all obscene things he wished he could do right now to the raven haired boy.  
Using dribbling chocolate to paint that snow white body and lick him clean until he would beg for more. He wanted to hear him cry and see his head tossing around only to know that he was about to lose his well behaved concentration. 

He would cover his rosy nipples with whipped cream and lick it with his tongue so rough it would let them swollen. Feeling his own pants getting tighter and tighter around his hard erection he moaned around Himuro’s dick at the thought of pushing himself into that body and seeing the lewd face.

That was when he had been distracted by a loud moan that came from above. Atsushi was so deep in thoughts that he almost overheard the small mewls and low groans. Tatsuya was breathing heavily and he just couldn’t believe that he made that sound.  
Covering his face with his arm, he bit himself to avoid letting more sounds out. Atsushi mustered him from below and hollowed to cheeks to give him a hard suck before sliding the member out of his mouth, making a “plop” sound. 

Himuro jerked upwards and closed his eyes tightly until a shadow covered his face. He opened them again, only to find Murasakibara’s face in front of him. “You don’t have to make such a painful face.” He licked his lips sensually making Himuro shiver again by the sight and lowered his head down to kiss his neck.

Maybe he should suck him off, too? Atsushi wanted to suck him off and from the state down there, Himuro could tell he was equally hard which gave him satisfaction. Using his hand, he placed it on the big bulge and gave it a squeeze, making Murasakibara moan into his ear.  
“Let me reward you, Atsushi.” They boy smiled as he pushed on the broad chest above him, but the other male shook his head. “Not today. Instead, let’s do this.”

He gave him another kiss before grabbing Himuro by his wrists and helping him to stand up. With a swift movement he turned him around and managed to let him lean against the wall. Himuro blinked and wondered what the giant was up to. For sure he wouldn’t… ah of course not! He shook his head and heard how pants have been pulled down.

Pressing his chest on Himuro’s back, he whispered into his ear more in a childish and amused tone. “Close your legs, Muro-chin ~ ”As in a trance, he did it and jolted as a slick and massive member pushed through his gap right under his own manhood. He couldn’t help but look down and stare at the difference.

“Is this okay?” He asked and placed his hands on the other boy’s waist. “You seem out of breath.” Himuro didn’t know if Atsushi was actually mocking him right now because he knew how big he is and maybe he expected his reaction.  
However, the boy let out a short chuckle. “Ah yeah, I’m fine.” And yet he trembled inwardly by staring at the thing underneath him. If they would ever get to the point to be even more intimate, how in the world would this thing fit inside of him without ripping him in two pieces? Still, the obscene thought of having something so big inside of him, made him excited.

He sighed and swallowed hard as Atsushi began to move his hips, causing their members to rub on each other. Himuro never felt another man’s dick on his but the feeling of Atsushi’s member was breathtaking. He was getting even hotter and opened his mouth to breath in more air.

His team mate was louder than him and without shame as he moaned and moved quicker. His hands were gripping his waist harder and shoving himself rougher between those delicious thighs by the feel of his smaller friend.  
The weight on his back pressed him down while Atsushi rocked his hips forward and leaning into him, groaning into his ear and sucking on his neck in time. Honestly, it was so hard to remain calm in this situation that Himuro let out more moans and sighs than he expected. 

It was a wonderful feeling being pressed down and covered by this big beautiful cover and somehow Himuro felt a little bit sad that he didn’t touch Atsushi more as he sucked him. He wanted to place his hands on that big chest and feel his rock hard muscles. But he would, he thought and turned his head to find Atsushi’s mouth.

Kissing him passionately, he sneaked one arm behind him and touched Atsushi’s butt to press him forward, giving him a signal that Himuro wanted him which made the giant’s heart jump in overwhelming joy. This maybe wasn’t the whole sex act, but still being able to be this close to Himuro was a huge success. 

A large hand reached down to their throbbing members and covered them both to pump them furiously, making both moaning even louder. They both could feel their end coming as Atsushi pounded his hips a last but powerful time.

Himuro bit his lower lip so hard that it almost tore the skin as he let out his high while Atsushi bit down on his shoulder. He let go of his lip in surprise and cried out. Both released their liquid together and panted heavily after coming down from their high.  
Without speaking, Atsushi turned Himuro around and knelt down to lick his member and taste him again. Panicking that he would get hard again, Himuro’s knees wobbled and he sank down just before his friend. Panting, he placed his hand on Atsushi’s chest and pushed him back. 

He didn’t even realize that his face was flushed and the glow was still there that Atsushi’s eyes widened in amazement. Seeing the otherwise calm and polite face, it was really sight now. “Wow.” He smiled and ran a thumb over the lower lip. “So you’re able to show another face.”

The boy sighed through his nose. “Well, you almost crushed me and it’s only natural for me to act like this.”  
“Crush you?” He cocked a violet eyebrow and looked at his shoulder that had a light mark from his teeth. “I hope it didn’t hurt.” His eyes showed a worried expression and Himuro thought he should calm him down. “No, it didn’t. I was just… overwhelmed.”  
The smile appeared again on the other’s face. “Ah, that’s good.” And he wasn’t lying because for a brief moment, he swore he would let his control slip and pound into the smaller male like crazy. His laziness returned as he yawned and leant forward to let his forehead meet the other ones.

“I assume that you’re staying the night here, huh Muro-chin? Because I’m sure as hell won’t let you go now.” He heard a chuckle and closed his eyes. “Baka, of course I won’t go. Not like this.”  
“Good, so let’s go to the bed. I haven’t slept almost the entire week.” 

Himuro wondered if this was because of his state and hat he was thinking too much. But was it now regulated with this act that happened minutes ago? He had no idea because his issue was still there and he did not know how Atsushi now felt.  
Was it just a onetime thing or maybe more? He had no idea but looking at Atsushi’s sleepy face, he wouldn’t mind lying with him in a bed and letting the big body warm him. “Bed sounds good.” He replied and stood up just as his embarrassment kicked in. He covered his lower half, but Murasakibara chuckled lightly. 

“We can clean ourselves first, if you really want.”  
Observing how the giant just put on some lousy pants and crashing into the bed, Himuro could only blink at him. So he was even too lazy to clean himself after a mess like this? And for some reason Himuro didn’t want to wash the scent off him and decided to follow suit. 

As soon as he approached the bed, large hands grabbed him like a pillow and pushed him against a warm chest. He heard a satisfied hum from above as Atsushi nose smelled his black hair. How was he supposed to act around this child? One thing was sure; he was someone that could show another side of him just like Himuro.

Looking up, he grinned at him and noticed that since he had been dragged into this house, Atsushi used his body just as he wanted. Of course, he was asking him mostly about the things he wanted to do, but still, he took advantage of his height and power to position Himuro just as he wanted. 

For some reason Himuro felt like he should kick his big butt for this and yet, he was happy for this leading act. Inhaling the familiar scent, he closed his eyes and shifted closer to his friend, thinking about all kinds of things how this should go on. But in the end he couldn’t find the answer and fell slowly asleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> you are all pervets and I like you! I don't know guys, but sometimes when I write my stories I tend to wander too much with my mind and write such strange sentences...*shakes head* whatever...
> 
> thanks for reading! (and holy moly thanks for all the kudos I feel so much love :)


	8. It started

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I always try my best to make the characters appear to their original personality of the anime even if I'm mixing some other features into them. 
> 
> But it's not easy, above all when one is writing about Himuro, Mukkun and AKASHI (!!!)   
> I still hope I made them stick to their original character...

Once again, Himuro woke up just to find himself surround by a pleasant warmth of another body lying close to him. The same coziness he felt weeks ago and this time he could watch Murasakibara’s sleeping face without turning around only to be pressed into position by those strong arms. 

His features were calm, only his brows were slightly tense, like he was concentrating on something. Maybe he was dreaming of food since he didn’t eat yesterday that much. Himuro always thought his big friend would look like a child during sleep but that didn’t occurred. He looked different, somehow older. 

Himuro blinked at him until he remembered what they did yesterday and that’s when he held up the blanket. Glancing over to the big beautiful body, Himuro got slightly red. He really thought they would go the whole way. And as much as he was afraid of that, somehow he was disappointed that they didn’t do it.

He swallowed and reached forward to trail his fingers from the broad chest down to his hard abs. He didn’t have the chance to explore this body as Atsushi was all over him, tasting him down there. It made him feel guilty that he was indeed avoiding him the past weeks and the result of this was that Murasakibara had noticed and he even said he couldn’t sleep because of this.  
It looked like he was desperate to find him and when he did he left no opportunity for Himuro to ran away again. The older male still wondered if Atsushi followed him or if they met accidentally at the station?

The bigger male shivered while feeling the touch and opened his heavy eye lids. Violet orbs looked into the murky grey one that stared right at him. He blinked at his friend and exhaled through his nose before he smiled softly. Himuro was amazed seeing this soft expression and smiled softly back at him. 

The big male closed his eyes again while mumbling incoherently. “Muro-chin is so pretty…” And Himuro was sure, Atsushi went back to sleep again, how carefree he thought and grinned. As much as he would like to lie like this forever, he had to stand up and clean himself. 

Not wanting to wake up his friend he slowly moved away and stood up to find his pants. Looking at his dark grey shirt, he could see the leftover of his own mess and sighed. He needed to change but hadn’t any clothes with him. He shook his head and headed to the bathroom.

Splashing water in his face and on his parts, he grabbed the mouthwash on the table and cleared his mouth. He rubbed water at the white spot it to make it less visibly but still, the obvious sign of what was on his shirt was still there. Growling he looked into the mirror and his stare met the red mark on his shoulder that was from Murasakibara’s teeth. 

“I got marked…” he said while rubbing at it and grinned. He wanted to do this to the big male as well. Knowing that he couldn’t do anything about the mess on his shirt, he came back to the room where Atsushi was sitting on the bed. His eyes glanced at the ground as he was still in his own world. 

If Himuro wouldn’t wake up in another house, he would act like him. But the fact that he was at a friend’s house, he always woke up first and was alert from the moment he woke up. The younger boy’s face turned to him as he stood in the doorway.  
“There you are.” He sighed out relieved. “I thought you went home.” He ran a hand through his purple hair, sighing loudly. Himuro blinked at him and quickly grinned afterwards. “No, I’m still here.” He walked over to the other male.

“I thought you have seen me.” He said and looked down at him. Murasakibara looked up, which really was a rare side. He furrowed his brows for a moment. “Yeah, I thought it was a dream.” He reached his large arms around Himuro’s lower back and stared at his shirt.

“Uhm, do you have something for me to wear? I know it’s stupid to ask because of the size but as you can see….I can’t go out like this.” The younger boy grinned because he knew it was his doing that Himuro dirtied himself.

“I can give you this.” He said and stood up, stretching his big body in front of his friend. As he walked to his wardrobe, Himuro observed his back and sat down. After some moments, he turned around and tossed a dark purple hoody at him.   
Himuro scanned it with his eyes and put it on while Murasakibara got himself dressed. “Do you want to go to a funfair?” He heard him from the bathroom as Himuro looked into the mirror to see that the hoody was too big for him. Still, it felt nice on him and he liked the scent. It didn’t even look that bad on him. 

Himuro grabbed his cell phone and saw that the donut shop, he applied to, wanted to hire him the next week. He grinned and scrolled down to see that Alex wanted to meet him. But that could wait.  
“Funfair? Yeah, why not.”

His eyes shined like those of a kid before Christmas Eve. While dashing forward, he grabbed Himuro by his arms and grinned. They looked into each other’s eyes for a moment as their expressions faded. 

Himuro couldn’t believe that Murasakaibara was able to change his features, no his personality just like that. Usually, he was the childish giant with a grumpy and arrogant attitude but as soon as he was with him, he could smile so wonderfully and even turn into such a horny mess.

The bigger male placed his arms on Himuro’s back and pressed him to his chest briefly before letting him go. “I really need to eat, Muro-chin. I’m starving.”  
“Ok. I’ll be going then and we can meet later again.”  
“You don’t want to eat here? Are you sick?”  
“No I’m good. I want to look through some things at my flat.”

Murasakibara looked at him from above, scanning his features before titling his head like a dog. There was concern and insecurity in his eyes and Himuro just couldn’t let it be like this. He threw his arms around his friend’s neck and dragged him down so that their lips could meet. 

“See you later.”

He patted his cheek softly and walked down the stairs, followed by the Miracle member. Somehow he felt like he just kicked a purple haired dog and luckily he didn’t have to look at the bigger male’s face now. 

He opened the door and turned around only to see that Murasakibara was deeply in thoughts. As his eyes locked with Himuro’s, he nodded. “I’ll pick you up later.” The other boy nodded and took his leave after giving Atsushi a glance.   
He heard the door closing and wondered what his giant friend was thinking about. Fact was, he needed some air right now to collect his own thoughts. If he remembered correctly, Murasakibara wanted to talk. This preyed on his mind and he knew, he should ask him later about that.

After all, he had avoided him for the past 3 weeks. While walking and thinking about it, he felt stupid for being a coward. But what could he do if Murasakibara was the one that send him strange signals? He sighed and buried his hands in the pockets of the hoody. It was not easy to handle the purple haired candy lover but his presence was such a comfort whenever he was around.  
He smiled to himself and heard a feminine giggle. Looking ahead, he saw his neighbor, the old granny that always had to say something whenever she met him. “My my, isn’t that thing a bit too big on you, young man?”

Himuro smiled politely at her. “Yes, indeed it is. But it’s from a friend.” Her eyes went wide with amusement, scanning his figure from head to toe. “Oh, is it the well-built boy with the purple hair? As I can see, he takes good care of you.”  
That old lady sure had stories to tell to her same aged friends. Himuro wondered if she was talking about him and his life with them because he could truly imagine that. She was very kind but sometimes her curiosity was too strong and some of her advices were out of line.

But was Murasakibara taking care of him? Maybe he tried, or maybe Himuro was the one taking care of his needs? He didn’t mind as long as he could be with him. Bowing down he grinned inwardly. “We take care of each other.” 

Being satisfied with that answer she smiled widely and past him with a giant pot of flowers in it. Himuro suggest helping her, but she just shook her head and left him. Yeah, she was a tough old lady. After walking the stairs up to his floor, he unlocked the door to his flat and went it, realizing that it only took him about 15 min to come here from Atsushi’s house.

For a quiet moment, he leant against the door, grabbed the collar of the hoody and pressed it to his nose, inhaling the unique scent from Atsushi. It was crazy how much he liked it and now he wore it. Sighing out loud, he pulled the cloth over his head, folded it and placed it on the bed. 

He then did the same with the shirt and threw it in a bow where the hamper was. Not knowing how long his friend would take, he cleaned himself and made a cup of tea while looking around in his small flat.  
He watered the few plants, sent his mother an e-mail and looked into the fridge. He really should go buy some more groceries for the next week. While sitting on the bed in fresh clothes and sipping down the hot liquid, he held his cell phone out and smiled about the confirmation.

Now he just needed a second job to extend the time he could stay in Japan and to pay the rent. Scrolling further down, he read the message from Alex that contained, how he felt and if he met Kagami.

Reading more of the lines on the display, Alex asked if he had the time to meet up with her. Surely, she wants to talk about how he lived by far and his connection to Kagami. Himuro held to his arrangement but hated himself for being like that. He hated to know that he was scared of getting to close to his brother and that Kagami would be actually able to surpass him.

Touching the ring on the necklace, he bit down on his lower lip. Would it be the same with Murasakibara? Even if their connection went beyond the limit, which happened just yesterday, Himuro was afraid he would get the blockade. A mechanism that was inside him whenever he got too close to people and was scared that they might leave him, so the only thing to do was to be the one who push them away.

Suddenly, his cheeks turned red. What if Atsushi wanted to go further yesterday but was too afraid to do it? After all, he could see so much desire and so many claims in his eyes but Atsushi was the one, who decided other way.   
It’s not like he didn’t want to do it, it was just that maybe he wasn’t ready for this, even if a part of his being, which became bigger and bigger, truly longed after this connection. For someone with a poker face, Himuro was a person that would think too much, and feel too much.

But in the end, he would cool down his head to leave the important things to his heart, warming it with important things that would bring him to the right decision. 

Xxx

Murasakibara scratched the back of his head while looking through his store of candy and noticed that even if he hadn’t eaten that much in the past weeks, there were still not enough. The good thing was he could buy new candy at the funfair.   
Grabbing some chocolate bars and putting it in his backpack, he decided to use the car today because now he had a reason to go somewhere else and to take someone with him. The thought made his heart quiver in joy as he walked down the stairs. 

He went through the door and walked down to the small garage in which his car was sleeping. Hoping it wouldn’t look that dirty, he grabbed a chocolate bar and shoved it into his mouth, moaning as the sweet taste hit his tongue. 

While driving the road up to Himuro’s flat, Murasakibara chewed gum and pondered if he probably scared his smaller friend. But as soon as he remembered those soft whimpers and the delicious tone of his moaning, he felt guilty for kidnapping Himuro like that and bringing him to his house. 

But he was desperate. He knew exactly that the male with the beauty mark under his eye was avoiding him and Atsushi knew why. It drove him crazy that he was jealous about Kagami and whenever he saw the necklace on him or Himuro, something inside him was growling. 

He had a hard time to realize this and now that he did, it just made him grumpier. Himuro didn’t even belong to him but he wished he would. It was still a miracle that the black haired boy had so much tolerance for him.

All the other members of Yosen couldn’t handle him like that and Atsushi was happy about it. They were only talking about things that he didn’t care about. But Himuro was someone, who was quiet and waiting for him to say something just to respond quickly to this. He liked that, but still he would like it even more if Himuro would speak more about himself. Maybe he could manage this to get the boy to open up to him?

In order to this, he needed to understand his being and take more interest in another person, which he only did once. And that was when he met Akashi who beat him in a match. But that was basketball and this here, was something else. Something deeper and he hoped he had the energy to understand this.

One thing was sure he would do hell to try his best to understand the other male even if he was scarred to crush him. Because just now when Himuro told him he would leave he felt like he did something wrong. As if he would overwhelm him with his body and his need to get closer.

He knew that Himuro was someone that demanded his freedom and maybe this freedom could be the reason to let Himuro drift away from him. Murasakibara didn’t want this to happen so he would do anything keep him close. Easier said than done.   
Atushi never really cared about relationships or a bonding. If people wanted to stay than he would let him. But most of them were annoying so he never used his energy to care about his bonds, but not this time.

He looked out of the window to see the skyscraper on his left side and parked the car near the entrance. Writing a message to Himuro, he tapped his fingers on the wheel chair. If Himuro really didn’t want to hang out with him, he wouldn’t send him a reply with the answer, “Okay, I’m coming down.”

He needed to get this on in more careful way which was not his specialty. But people change, right? His purple eyes observed how Himuro came through the thick doors and looked surprised around only to find Atsushi sitting in a car.   
The younger boy opened the door of the passenger seat and nodded in the way that would say, come here. Himuro understood quickly and walked over to place himself next to him and shut the door.

“Wow, Atsushi I didn’t knew you have car. That’s really practical.”  
Murasakibara looked at him, taking in the soft smile and responded equally. He always felt the need to smile back at Himuro whenever he smiled at him. It gave him such a nice feeling, like it was all in a honest way.  
“I use it seldom, because I’m too lazy to make trips alone.”

“That’s good that we’re together now and that we’re making a little trip right?”  
“Yes.” Atsushi cleared his throat and pointed with his thumb behind him at the back seats. “It’s going to be a longer ride so it’s handy. Besides, I need to buy new stuff.”

Himuro knew his friend was lazy but hearing him that he was alone, made him feel better that he now got the chance to do something about this. Knowing that the younger male didn’t eat much, he had taken some candy from his own stock and placed it between his legs.

He fished something out of the plastic bag and handed it over to Atsushi who was about to start the engine. “Here.” It was a big Twix bar but the white chocolate edition which tasted even sweeter than the original one. “We can share.”  
Atsushi gave him a quick glance before turning his eyes on the road again. “Thanks. Please open the package and give it to me.” And that’s what the black haired boy did. He freed the Twix bar out of its package and reached out to his friend with it who just turned his head and bit a big piece of it off. 

“Ah thafts, goof.” He mumbled while chewing. “You can feed me while I’m drifing.”  
Himuro grinned. “But not too much or else you’ll getting a sugar rush. And that’s not good when you’re driving. But when I’m thinking…did you ever have a sugar rush?”

“Nah, not really. But I can get sleepy from the same type of thing that I eat.”  
“I see. So I will take care of you.”

Atsushi swallowed, not looking at his friend. Yes, he was back to normal, acting like an adult with the good intention to look after him. But he could take care of him as well, he grinned inwardly. Maybe not in the same way, but in his own and he hoped he wouldn’t mess it up.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know It took me way to long but my current latop is dying slowly so I have to be careful until my new laptop will be brought by the mailman. (I CAN'T WAIT UNTIL SATURDAY)
> 
> This applies to all my other stories which I posted recently. Those are new projects  
> I'm working on but now I can only collect ideas and some cuttings for the whole plot or else my laptop will kill every process...
> 
> Please don't think I stopped writing!
> 
> anyway, thanks for reading! :)


	9. Ferris Wheel

Murasakibara's eyes were shining as they saw the carnival in front of them. Seeing all those stalls that were overflowing with candy packed in colorful packages was making him really happy. Himuro next to him observed him and grinned, already knowing this would happen.   
"Do you want to visit those first?" He asked and turned his head to him, giving him a soft smile. It still amazed the giant that Himuro was so tolerant with his desire for candy and how patient he was around him. 

He never met someone like him who was accepting him for the lazy human being he was and still he wished Himuro would open up to him. But how could he make him? Himuro was one of those people that are silent and think too much. Murasakibara always thought that chaos was inside their heads while they showed their calm side.  
And even if Himuro always acted cool, he still had the chance to see him all fired up during their matches or whenever he was talking with Alex. Another thing Atsushi admired about him was the ability to switch so quickly and always having the right words. 

"Yeah, I'm hungry." He answered and followed the smaller male who went ahead of him as if he knew the answer would be yes. His purple eyes scanned the frame of his friend and he felt the desire to use his hands and cage him to his body.   
Without thinking he placed his chin on Himuro's head, sighing through his nose as they approached the first stall. "Oi, Atsushi don't use my head as a tray." The older boy mumbled softy but still in a firm tone. 

But the other male didn't think about moving. He just let his eyes roam over the various types of chocolate and the fruits that were dipped into it. "Do you mind?" He heard from below and let go off his friend. "Thanks, I'm over there okay? Don't rush yourself!"   
With those words, Himuro left him and went to another stall. For a moment, it seemed like he was running away from him again which made the Miracle member grumble inwardly. Looking after him, he blinked several times. 

He remebered that he wanted to ask Himuro something. Something that was in his head the first time Himuro avoided him. When they finally met, the raven haired boy even asked what it was, but Murasakibara was too deep in his own pleasure to talk in the moment he held the boy close to him.

From the first time this boy came into the Yosen team and looked into his purple eyes, Atsushi thought he would be another passionate player who would talk too much about basketball but this one was different. He was passionate and still there was something about him that couldn't bring Atsushi to hate him.  
Turning his head to the candy snacks, he thought he should give Himuro his space while he was slowly buying his desired collection of sweet stuff. Walking from on stall to the next, he only could furro his brows for being so impatient. 

Thinking about other human beings in this way was never an option for him. It annoyed him like hell and now it gave him a head ache. But he didn't want to leave things like they were now. There were still so many things to talk about, something Murasakibara was never good about it. 

But just thinking about it and knowing to have Himuro in front of him made him excited. And still, he was afraid he would crush the other male with his body and his will to be by his side almost every second. He didn't want to be a burden to his friend and he didn't want him like a babysitter like the others called Himuro.  
He knew from the start that Himuro was someone who seeked his own space, but Atsushi always asked himself if solitude was a part of it. 

Running a hand through his violet hair, he stilled the hand and ruffled it in annoyance. "Are you okay?" He heard beside him and looked into a murky grey eye. Concern and sincere curiousity was inside that eye with the beauty mark underneath it.   
Violet orbs blinked down at him and Atsushi just couldn't stop his movement when he reached out and wiped his thumb over it. Himuro's eye widened slightly as he observed the face that was painted in concentration. 

"Let's go on the ferris wheel." He grumbled out and surprised the smaller male as he tugged his sleeve to drag him away from the stalls. It wasn't easy for Himuro to deal sometimes with this big guy. Atsushi tented to change his ideas quickly and showed it right away.  
The older boy just could look at him, wait and think again what he wanted or what he was going to do. Since their time in Murasakibara's bed, Himuro was aware of the fact that his friend liked to take the lead suddenly and do as he wanted. 

Letting himself be dragged by the younger male he looked around silently, observing the people and the attractions. In the afternoon the lights shined so brightly and Himuro realized, it has been ages since he has been at a carneval. 

Looking back at Atsushi's other hand, which held a big plastic bag he assumed the giant bought everything he needed. As Murasakibara finally slowed down, only to let go of Himuro and quickly searching through his bag, he grabbed a package of Pocky sticks and turned to his older friend.   
He offered it to him so he could take some of the sticks out. While Himuro did so, Atsushi avoided his glance and stared at the line to the checkout. What was his giant up to again, he pondered while shoving a stick into his mouth.

As the purple head took one into his mouth as well, he nibbled on one end. Himuro observed him and thought, that he was thinking too much propably. They came here with the intention to enjoy each other and do something nice but it turned out so tense and uncomfortable.  
Poking his finger into Murasakibara's stomach, he managed that the taller male turned down to him, giving him an asking expression. He lowered his head down and Himuro took the chance to quickly bite a piece off the Pocky stick, surprising his friend. 

"Muro-chin..." He mumbled and shoved the half completely into his mouth. "You could just say that you want some more."   
Himuro smiled at him and buried his hands into his pockets. "It's okay. I just wanted another bite." Atsushi swallowed and huffed through his nose as he came closer with his face. "You should be careful or I might get some ideas."

Now it was Himuro's time to be surprised at those words. Suddenly an overload of ideas rushed through his mind and it seemed that his face slipped because Atsushi let out at giggle. "Did I scare Muro-chin now?" He asked and used his childish tone again.

Himuro smirked. "I didn't expect that." They moved forward, almost to the checkout but there was another couple before them. "Why?" Atsushi asked as his brows met in the middle. Maybe Himuro thought that he could only act childish and letting out something like this was unusual.   
But Atsushi could be so much more than he appeared, it just took too much energy to show it. Besides, there only had to be a worthy person who would be able to see all his sides and he knew who this was. He wanted to show Himuro what he was capable of doing and being and he wished from the bottom of his heart, Himuro would entrust himself to him so that he could see different sides of him as well.

"It surprised me again. You manage to change your personality sometimes which fascinates me." Murasakibara's eyes widened. He didn't recieve many compliments but he could feel it in his stomach that this one, was a real compliment that had nothing tot do with his talent. Besides, it meant that Himuro recognized his changes, that he was ablee to see the differenc in his being. 

As they moved forward and payed for the tickett, Atsushi avoided looking at him because somehow he couldn't hide his blush. Smiling at the old lady behind the checkout, Himuro took the ticketts and walked after his friend into the wagon.

Without windows and a clear view, it was chilly as the air hit their faces. Himuro wraped up himself in his coat and buried the lower half of his face in his scarf while looking in front of him. It wasn't the biggest ferris wheel and yet, he was able to see such a beautiful view.  
Atsushi who was sitting across him, chewed a gummy bear. Seeing that his friend was shivering, he decided to sit himself next to him. Putting an arm around him to keep him warm, he wondered why Himuro felt cold so often. 

"Ah thanks, Atushi. You're really have a heater inside of you." The older boy smiled at him. Normally, Himuro wouldn't let it pass whenever someone tried to come closer to him, especially with his body. Now that Atsushi leant against him, he could feel the warmth and the comfort and was at ease.  
In general, he felt safe around his big friend and not alone. It would make things more difficult to enjoy himself being alone all the time, even if he enjoyed his autonomy. But still, he wished the purple head would talk more so he would be able to know what the giant was thinking. 

In the last weeks, just after they met Kagami, Murasakibara acted strange and Himuro thought he should give him his piece which turned out that his friend was annoyed because of something he still haven't told him.  
"Say Atsushi, do you feel better now?"   
"Hm? Why do you ask?"

Recalling his words, there had to be something that really didn't allow him to sleep the last weeks. He wondered what it could have been that made the giant so nervous and confused. Atsushi wasn't the type to think about stuff all the time and yet there had to be something that caught his mind.

"You told me you couldn't concentrate on anything when I'm with you and that you couldn't even sleep." Himuro didn't look at him. He just looked ahead of him, and how they went higher and higher. "I...was avoiding you because I thought you needed your peace. If I'm a burden to you, you just have to say so."

As the Miracle member was listening to his friend, his eyes went wide after the last sentence. He pushed Himuro closer to him while sighing deeply though his nose. The moment he saw his friend with Kagami talking in their language, made Atsushi feel something he never did before. Not wanting to admit it, but definetly feeling it, he had been jealous.   
But of what? Of their past? Of the time they spent together or the fact that the necklace around their necks meant something special? Atsushi gritted his teeth before he answered right away. Yes, he was jealous and annoyed about this that Himuro thought he did something wrong. Shaking his head, his fingers tapped softly on Himuro's arm. 

"Muro-chin is not a burden." He swallowed and searched for the right words. How could he say that he was jealous when they weren't even together, like a real couple? Opening his mouth he quickly shoved a handfull of gummi bears in his mouth and chewed them quickly. 

Himuro smirked even if he didn't know why. He still had no idea what was going on but he was sure his friend would tell him. It just wasn't so easy for Atsushi. For the love of candy, he wanted to say the truth and rip his hair out at the same time only to keep quiet.

"The mistake is mine." Atsushi coughed after a while, causing Himuro to look up. "I felt strange for something that I couldn't understand. I think I get it now and yet It wasn't right for me to act like this."

Turning his head to the side and staring into the eye of his friend. "Muro-chin, I want to spent more time with you, so please don't think that you're a burden to me." He lowered his head and brushed his lips softly against the other's.   
"It's making me crazy to share you with other people." 

Himuro's eye widen and he just could stare at his friend and feel the warmth of his skin on his own. The violet color in his eyes shined so brightly that Himuro thought he could drown into them. "I hate shallow realtionships, and I hate to act like I care for other people but when I'm with you, I want to be closer to you than anyone else." Giving him a soft kiss, Atsushi waited for him to react, which Himuro did.

He kissed him back slowly and put his arm on his side, to drag him closer. As he heard those words, deep inside his stomach exploded something. It was warm and filled his entire body as he massaged those soft lips that tasted so sweet. It felt so good and so right.  
"I want to know more about you, too." The older male exhaled and inhaled the scent of his friend. "And I want to have you by my side more often. But I need to tell you, that I'm not an easy person..." Suddenly, it was hard to speak again. Himuro hated it to speak about himself and his hindrance to built relationships but it just slipped out of his mouth.

And even if he could feel that Atsushi meant it, he still was scared. But he didn't want to let him go just because he was the type of person who tented to be introverted. "You're a real shut-in, aren't you?" Muraskaibara spoke against his lips.   
Himuro didn't know what to answer to this. Maybe he was and maybe he wasn't. It depended. But one thing was sure, he always had a hard time to trust people and held many shallow realtionships without deeper meanings. 

Falling for someone was never an option for him because trust had always been a luxus. But looking into those big eyes and being held by this person that was at least two heads bigger than him, gave him the unique feeling of safety and care.  
"I want to take care of you." He heard him saying. "And you will take care of me." Himuro didn't know why, but he felt like crying. He wanted to avoid the stare but Atsushi grabbed his chin and didn't allow him to break their glance. 

Seeing how his eye began to tear, Himuro quickly swallowed and cursed himself for being so weak. Atsushi on the other side smiled at him and pressed the other body against him. Burying his face into Himuro's neck, he inhaled his scent and closed his eyes.   
"Please, let me be closer to you than anybody else."

And then Himuro understood why he felt so weak again. He realized now for how long he lived alone and without someone who would give him the love he needed. Murasakibara must have felt that because the way he held him and they way his words hit his heart was completely different than usual.  
It was like he understood how to handle Himuro. This one looked into the sky that was full of stars and let his heart beat wildly in his chest. So hard that he thought it would burst out. Smiling, he placed a hand on Atsushi's head. "You don't have to ask."

It took all in Atsushi's might not to attack Himuro right away because he understood now that he needed to be careful with him not to crush him. Now that Himuro confide in him, he felt so happy and overloaded with desire. Even if things would need their time, he was happy Himuro took a step towards him.  
"Atsushi..." He heard his name and made a sound. "Can we go to your place?" His heart made a jump and he had to lean back to look at his friend, who was smiling softly at him. "Of course we can."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> gomen for my long absence >_


	10. The ability to love

Finally, Murasakibara thought while kissing his older friend passionately and closing the door to his room behind him. The whole time, from the carnival to their car ride to the little steps to his house was an act of patience. 

He couldn't wait to touch the boy more and more. Those little strokes here and there weren't enough. But he knew he had to be careful with Himuro and pay more attention to his small acts and his words even if Himuro himself wasn't fragile, or at least tried to appear.   
The giant was just happy Himuro asked him and that they were finally in his room after the long ride where he only could imagine things he would love to do to him. Now was the right time to show him how much he liked him and that he could trust him.

Atsushi never met a person like this before. Himuro was older, quieter and more mature than him and yet he had something that made him indeed appear fragile sometimes. It didn't happen often, however. Back in the waggon on the ferris wheel was the first time Murasakibara had to rethink about how Himuro was feeling after being alone all the time.   
That's why he wanted to stay by his side every day. But still, there was this thing which the raven haired boy seeked. Indepence and his own space which was often too close to loneliness. It gave Atsushi a strange feeling. He liked being alone too but not in the same way as his friend.

The big male grabbed him under his thighs and carried him to the bed while kissing him. Letting him fall softly into the bed, he stared down and saw how his pale face blushed slightly. His mouth was opened and his chest moved up and down while bringing air back into his lungs after the long kiss.  
Placing a thumb on his lower lip, he massaged the soft skin there. He let his hands then slide down his chest and further down to his stomach to shove up his shirt. They already took off their jacketts and scarves on the way up to Atsushi's room, leaving a path of clothes behind them . The male underneath him shivered as cold air hit his skin and he grabbed his hands. 

Sitting up, he did the same to the purplehead who helped him by moving his arms up. Himuro immediately marveled at his broad chest and those abs, brushing his fingertips over the muscles down to his hard stomach while Atsushi watched him. The last time those two were together in this room, Himuro wasn't able to discover the big body of his friend as this one played with him.

Now he made sure he would take his time to explore his friend more. In reverse, Atsushi's eyes wandered up and down Himuro's snow white skin. Maybe it was the snow like color that made him appear so fragile? Or they way he was staring through the windows of the car with a longing expression on his handsome face.  
Murasakibara remembered a japanese proverb which said that people who have a mole under their eyes are destined to have a sorrowful life. He wondered what that could mean with regard to Himuro. He only was sure that he wanted to make that boy happy and stay by his side.

The big male leant down and sucked on Himuro's neck, making him shiver and moan quietly. In the meantime, Himuro fumbled with the belt and the buttons on Atsushi's pants and slid them down. There was an impressive buldge inside those dark blue boxer shorts that made him swallow hard.  
He grabbed it softly and gave it a firm squeeze which made Murasakibara buck his hips forward. "Isn't that painful?" Himuro smiled and titled his head to give his friend more room. "Let me ease you off your pain."

"Are you sure?" Atsushi didn't stop ravishing that neck and held Himuro's hips in a firm grip while enjoying the hand on his private part. "Yes, I want to taste you, too."  
The bigger male licked the skin and smile against it as Himuro pushed him down so that he was laying. Being sprawled on his own bed, Atsushi was curoius. He watched his older friend going down on him between his legs.

Himuro on the other side felt a bit nervous as he slid the boxers down, inch by inch. Revealing more skin and the fine line of violet hair that made him smirk. Such an unusual color, he thought and looked at the proudly standing member in front of him. 

The size took his breath away and ran straight to his own arousal. Placing his hands on those mighty thighs, he leant down but before he could do something, a hand on his hand stopped him.   
"You don't have to do this, Muro-chin." Atsushi breathed out. He looked like it was hard to restrain himself. The other boy smiled softly and blew air on his tip, making the giant shudder. "But I want to."

Keeping the dizzy gaze from his friend, Himuro took the very tip into his mouth and sucked it slowly. Letting his tongue swirl around it and taste the rich flavor made himself even bigger. He allowed enough time to lick around the top and rub his tongue against the slit which made Atsushi throw his head back and moan.  
The hand in those silky black strands of hair, massaged his scalp as Himuro worked on him. Because of the size, he surely wasn't able to take everything into his mouth. So he releazed the tip with a plop noice and titled his head to lick along the shaft up and down.

That hot mouth and the tongue massaged his painfully hard member and Murasakibara needed all his willpower not to grab Himuro's head with both hands and push him down. He gasped and moaned and closed his eyes while feeling that beautiful mouth on his member.  
Being encouraged by the lovely sounds, Himuro tried to take in as much as he could handle and almost gagged. Closing his eyes he concentrated on sucking the manhood and enjoyed the deep moan from above. 

"Muro-chin..." Atsushi exhaled and tugged on his hair to give him a warning. But Himuro took the chance and licked him to make him stickier and sucked harsher which made Atsushi clench his teeth and buck his hips as he came with a hiss. 

To Himuro, it was such an erotic sound. It made him shiver as the liquid shot out and hit his inner cavern. Sitting up, he wiped with the back of his hand the liquid around his mouth and swallowed. Licking his lips again, he smiled at Atsushi. "Mmm, you taste good."  
This one had to catch his breath for a moment before he tackled his friend. Making Himuro lay on his back, he kissed him passionately and slid down. Grabbing Himuro's legs, he straightened his position a little and took Himuro's lower half up with him.

Licking him on his inner thigh and behind his balls was just the beginning of the neccessary preparing act. He loved Himuro's body, his face, his scent and the little noises he let out shyly. And he wanted to make sure not to hurt him.

Himuro arched his back and was once again amazed how easy Murasakibara could turn his body just the way he wanted. Being held by those strong arms was surely a nice feeling. Streching his arms behind his head, he grabbed the large pillow and held onto it whereas his friend prepared him.  
He licked and used a healthy dose of saliva to make it easier to shove a finger inside that twitching hole. As he did so, Himuro gasped. "I need to get you ready." Atsushi mumbled while shoving the next finger inside him.

Watching out for Himuro and the somewhat strained expression on his handsome face, he began to scissor his fingers slowly. It felt strange, Himuro had to admit and Atsushi could read it on his face. Leaning down to him, he kissed his forhead while murmuring. "Please bear with it just a little longer."  
But Himuro knew this was just the beginning. Those were only two fingers, the real thing was still waiting for him. And yet he felt excited, having such a huge thing inside of him. Did he just discover a penchant? Or maybe it was just Atsushi he was inviting.

Suddenly, stars appeared behind his eyes and he moaned loudly. It happened again and again, leaving him out of breath as Atsushi's fingers pressed against a certain spot. The giant smiled and repeated his motion, absorbing every noise Himuro made and capturing his face with his eyes while he moaned.  
Then again, a third finger had been pushed inside. Himuro felt the stretching of his skin as he tried to bear with it. It burned but as soon as Atsushi touched his special spot, he forgot about it and arched his back. 

After some time that felt like an eternety, Himuro touched him by his bicep curl and looked into violet eyes that shined with excitement. His mouth was opened and his breathing was quicker than before and just seeing this pleasured expression on his face was making Murasakibara harder than ever.  
A hand came around his neck and brought him closer to that beautiful face. "Atsushi..." The older male exhaled into his ear. "I need you inside me."  
Such words turned him even more on and made sure, Himuro was ready. Ready for him. Taking his fingers out, Himuro already missed the feeling. Atsushi made himself comfortable between those slender legs and positioned the tip of his member against Himuro's hole.

Locking his gaze with Himuro's, he rubbed the tip on that hole and watched how the boy underneath him closed his eyes. He grabbed those milky white thighs and pushed himself inside slowly, inch by inch.

As he did so, Himuro had to clench his teeth and sensed immediately how his hole had been streched even further. With every little inch the streching became almost unbearable but on the other side, it felt so good having Atsushi inside of him.   
He inhaled sharply and dug his nails into Atsushi's back while this one buried his face in his neck. After the last push, he was fully inside him, making it hard for both to breath. This tightness was amazing even if it squeezed him to death.  
"Muro-chin, are you okay?" He spoke out under the preassure. From the way Himuro dug his nails into his skin, it must have been really hard to take all of him but the raven haired boy nodded. "Yeah... I'm okay. You can move now."

And that's what he did. Pulling out slowly and pressing inside again until he was sure, Himuro could breathe normally again. The older male gasped, moaned and growled while arching his back as Atsushi pushed himself inside.  
This time a bit faster, hitting his spot dead on. "Ah...there!" Himuro moaned out. His face was now a mix of pleasure and pain as he loosened his grip. It felt so good, he thought while taking that large member inside of him. 

Atsushi was able to touch every spot inside of him without searching too long, sending him with one thrust into heaven and Himuro's walls grabbed the huge manhood like a silky glove. Using a faster pace, Atsushi had Himuro panting for more.  
Soon the boy with the mole under his eye tried to meet that powerful thrust. He moved his hips and crossed his legs behind Atsushi's butt to bring him so much closer that even a paper couldn't be between them. 

Their bodies were on fire, sweating and rubbing against each other. Especially Himuro's errect member who touched Atsushi's stomach and left a wet trail. He sneaked his hand between there bodies and grabbed that neglect manhood and started to pump it with each thrust.  
The moaning became louder, a thing Himuro didn't want to be and bit his lower lip to surpress his erotic noises. Of course, the giant wasn't happy about this and licked his cheek.   
"I-I wan't to hear you." 

It doesn't matter how much Himuro was struggling not to let too many lewd noises out, he couldn't keep it in. Not when his friend made him feel so good. Reaching their climax, Himuro couldn't control himself anymore as he moaned and growled just like Atsushi.  
"Muro-chin...I'm so close."   
"Me too, c-come inside me."

Feeling his end coming closer, Himuro turned his head to the side and opened his mouth into a silent scream as he came. With that reply, Murasakibara hammered himself a last time into that warm hole and stopped as he moaned loudly, letting the sound rumble through Himuro's chest.  
Breathing hard, both needed their time to come down from their high. If Murasakibara could, he would stay like this forever but not wanting to hurt his friend, he slid out slowly. The mess on the bed didn't matter as he looked down and saw Himuro covered in his own seed on his chest.   
They looked into each others eyes and smiled sleepy. Himuro immediately reached out to bring his violet haired friend closer for a long kiss. Laying next to him, he wrapped one long arm around Himuro.

"Did it hurt much?" Atsushi asked while burying his face into the neck. He often fantasized about this situation and always feared Himuro would freak out because of his size or the fact that he might crush him.   
But the other male just smiled softly while patting his head. "Just a little but it felt so good." Atsushi swallowed and bit his collarbone. "If I weren't so sleep now, I would take you again right now."

Himuro laughed and closed his eyes. "You will have lots of opportunities for more rounds." The Miracle member stopped his action and leant back to lock into an equal sleepy but satisfied face. "Yes." He said slowly and realized what that mean. "So Muro-chin, do you want to be with me? Because I think I can't stand the thought of not being by your side."  
Hearing such heartwarming words, Himuro touched his cheek and couldn't stop smiling. "Yes, I want to, after all I'm in love with you."  
Now it was Atsushi who blushed. "I love you too...that was what confused me all the time. I never felt like this before."   
"And I thought I wouldn't be able to love until I met you."

Hugging him with all his might, he snuggled in a comfortable position. There it was, the side of a fragile moment that could make Atsushi rack his brains but he was too sleepy and fell asleep with Himuro, smiling all the time just like his lover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pheeeeeeeeew what date is it? Of course it took me way too long but what can I say?  
> I'm being productive and planing my future, even it's a strange and slow process...
> 
> I hope you liked the smut <3  
> stay tuned for morning smut...*ehem*
> 
>  
> 
> thanks for reading! (and ARIGATOU for all the kudos!!!)


	11. Hungry for you

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Murasakibara has a problem, Himuro soon will have one too.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> "I'm hungry for you my love, so come out and rescue me  
> love is just not enough, out in this war of needs" 
> 
> ~ Dotan - Hungry

Murasakibara inhaled deeply the scent of another human being that became his favourite. When was the last time he was so relaxed in the morning? He opened his eyes slowly, seeing that Himuro was laying with the back to him. Reaching his hand out, he touched his neck and drew a line with his fingers to the nape where his black hair ended.  
Watching with a small smile how his friend shuddered, he sustained himself on his elbow to look properly at that handsome face. Himuro's mouth was parted slightly and he had his head resting on his arm while breathing quietly.

Due to Murasakibara's frame, he tarnished Himumro's body as his eyes locked at the beautymark underneath his eye. While watching the raven-haired boy, Atsushi had to swallow hard. Looking this vulnerable pushed a button inside of him. 

He was happy that Himuro let him do all the things that happened the night before. He was happy that this beautiful human being wanted to stay by his side. Himuro managed to make him feel so calm and balanced and Murasakibara knew he wanted to spent every minute of his live with this boy. And here he got his problem.   
He was scared for being too clingy, for crushing Himuro with his needy attention or the way he wanted to make love to him. It was hard to restrain himself but he had the feeling that on some point he might lose control. His fanatasies would drive him crazy.

The Miracle player sighed and layed back as he pressed the other body to himself. Who would have guessed that he was actually able to find the love of his life? He who always had been annoyed by people and got easily irritated by their behaviour. All those years, he spend his time alone by himself or around the other Miracle members and never thinking about stuff like that.

Whenever the Yosen team was out having a good time, Murasakibara was the one who would sit in the corner and count the seconds until it was over so he could go home, eat his snacks and play some video games. It was strenuous for him since other people's life are just too boring. So why should he listen to pointless talks? 

That was until this beauty of a man joined his team and Atsushi had been thunderstrucked. As he remembered the advances he tried or the mess in his head on how to get close, he had to hide his face immediately in Himuro's neck. "What a pain..." he groaned and was happy he had that stuff behind him now and Himuro close to his chest.  
That it was actually possible to hunger for another person, for someone who was never interested in people or love at all. But Atsushi couldn't be happier. 

Himuro on the other side blinked several times before he streched out his body and flinched. He was aware from where that pain came from and still he could smile immediately. Just the mere thought about what happened hours ago made him shiver. 

Even though he was scared to take this step, he was now glad it happened. Was Atsushi still sleeping? He couldn't turn around due to their positions and since he didn't hear anything, he assumed so. He wanted to turn around and look into those violet eyes but was too lazy to even move. 

Himuro was actually a person who didn't like to share a bed but this kind of warmth on his back was pleasantly. He liked watching Murasakibara's face and how those orbs caught his stare was utterly beautiful. The first time Himuro watched him sleep and see opening his eyes, he knew he would love to see that again.  
Whenever the big male was around him which was almost always since the past weeks, Himuro felt safe and somehow it felt like being home. 

"Home..." he muttered. He realized he had been lonely for a long time. Did Atsushi know this? There were times when his friend looked at him with those knowing eyes and still, Himuro had no idea what he was able to see. After all, Himuro was someone who would never show what was inside him and maybe this was the fact that scared him that Atsushi was able to see all the things he was so desperate to hide. Himuro wanted to stand up and surprise his lover with a sixpack of donuts as breakfast, however the big boy had other plans. 

Just like the other times, Atsushi grabbed Himuro's arm pressed him to his chest and caged him with his long arms. While breathing on that pale neck, large hands roamed over his chest. "Where do you think you're going?" He mumbled and made the older male shiver. "You're awake? I wanted to bring you breakfast." One hand slid down between Himuro's legs who pressed them together instantly.

"Sounds great..but first," Himuro swallowed hard. "let me have you like this for a little longer." How was he able to say no to this? Somehow he sounded like this would be the last time which made Himuro furrow his brows for a second. He wanted to touch him too but was in no position to do so.  
Atsushi was playing with him again, making him passive. Those long fingers trailed down his thighs to his entrance. "Hng!" Himuro arched his back in surprise as one finger slipped right inside. "You're still loose." Atsushi smiled against his skin. "Can I enter?" The raven-haired boy sighed. He barely woke up and was already caught in naughty stuff. "Hmm."

His entire body was thrilled for that one connection that was about to happen as Atsushi moved even closer to him, lifted his leg up and shoved himself inside with a deep sigh. This wouldn't go as smooth without the preparation the other night and still, the breath in his lungs had been cut off.  
He opened his mouth and gasped, throwing his arm back to grasp at Atsushi's biceps. Even if his head was awake, his body somehow was still asleep which made it harder for him to move. Should he tease him a bit more? Himuro grinned and streched his upper body to move even closer to that broad chest behind him. "Ah Atsushi...you know what I like about you?"

His partner hummed and stopped, waiting for his lover to talk. This gave Himuro the time to nestle his body to him while turning his head so he could whisper into Atsushi's ear. Gasping and panting in a lewd way he almost mouthed into that ear. "I love your big...huge..." Murasakibara's eyes went wide as his grabbed Himuro's thigh firmer. His lover sounded so needy and so desperate like he couldn't hold it. 

"Enormous...!" He gasped loudly and pressed his legs togheter, making the other male choke on his breathing. They looked into each other's eyes for a long moment and Atsushi didn't know what he expected after Himuro smiled. "Heart." He gave his lover a quick peck on his cheek and laughed at his expression.   
"Muro-chin..." He purred and changed their position. "That's dangerous." With a swift movement, he was behind Himuro who was now on his four legs, melting to the bed as he felt the sweet concection hitting him over and over again. The purple head didn't have in mind to go all intense in the morning but he couldn't help after this little demonstration. He kissed that exposed pale neck and buried himself deeply into that tight hole, making the raven moan.

Big hands grabbed his hips firmly and trailed down to his thighs, massaging them as Atsushi pushed himself inside so sensually slow that Himuro moved his hips to meet him. Grabbind the sheets tightly, he shut his eyes and bit the pillow to prevent himself from moaning too loudly.   
Atsushi observed that pale back and let his hands trail over that milky skin, sighing deeply. He wondered if this was enough. His stamina was in perfect condition and he would love to do this for hours but was scared he would brake Himuro.

Biting his lower lip, he grabbed the older male by his thighs and pulled him up a bit to gave him a last powerful thrust. Himuro gasped in a high pitched noise and arched his back as he felt the warm liquid and released himself on the bed sheet.   
That was quick, he thought while breathing heavily. He felt like Atsushi already knew where to press his buttons for making him like this and it made him shudder. He really would love to stay like this the entire day but he promised to meet Alex after a long time and didn't want to reschedule the date. He waited for the purple haired male behind him to pull himself out and wondered what Atsushi was doing.

He turned his head to the side and saw how he came down, touching his back with his chest and nuzzling his neck. "What is it, Atsushi?" He asked out of breath. First, he only heard a low grumble and furrowed his brows after meeting violet orbs. "I want more." He almost whispered but still sounded like a child that wanted more candy.  
The raven haired player smiled softly at him. "Me too, but I have to meet someone today." Atsushi pulled out slowly, earning a mewl from underneath. "Hm? Who?" He turned Himuro around to look at him and titled his head like a dog. However, his eyes looked like they wanted to scan Himuro.  
"An old friend and after that I have to work." Atsushi made a pout but didn't say anything more, just nodded slowly. It gave Himuro thoughts, seeing that face as he washed himself, said goodbye to his lover and walked to his own apartment.

Like a hidden message behind those eyes, the older male had a slight idea why Atsushi was looking that way. Looking through his small apartment he noticed how cold it was. He still got some time before he would meet Alex at the casino he saw behind the center of the city.   
Looking out of the window he started to feel strange. Actually lost somehow. When he planned to come to Japan, he thought he would take the solotrip and was prepared for living and doing everything alone. Since the past months, Atsushi became more and more a part of his everyday life, which he didn't expect.   
Himuro let out a small desperate laugh. He became accustomed to the giant's presence and now, when he was alone for some minutes he already felt lost. "What a mess I am." He whispered and shook his head. Is this really going to work out, he thought and stared out of the window. Was this really okay? For him or Atsushi? So many strange thoughts keep running through his head, only because of his fear. 

As long as Atsushi wanted him, everything would be fine, right? At least he hoped so. He noticed the letters that were lying on the ground and picked them up. There was one from his mother and a bill. Gritting his teeth, he opened the bill first and swallowed hard. It said what he would have to pay in the future when he will need to pay the rent on his own. "Maybe I need a second job..."   
While reading his Mother's letter, Alex was already calling him. Putting the latter aside, he made his way to his oldtime friend. Maybe he should ask her without sounding like a helpless kid.

Murasakibara yawned as he walked through the city. After playing video games he decided to go out. Not an idea he would usually have but staying home all day was making him somehow depressive. He observed the people around him, almost always some couples. It was like a curse that those happen to caught his attention.   
As he bought himself a muffin, he mustered them and their behaviour. How they talked to each other, how they held hands and where they would go until he was annoyed by himself for acting like a creep. What was he going to do now with all his free time? His parents weren't home and he got nothing else to do. Besides, doing things alone wasn't as fun as he thought. 

He walked past a furniture shop and overheared a woman who was squealing in joy as her boyfriend showed her pram. Of course, neither he nor Himuro could have a baby but as Murasakibara looked over to their full packed cart, it hit him. What if he and Himuro lived together? His eyes went big as he stared at them. He shook his head slightly as if he woke up from a dream. Wait, wouldn't that mean he would have Himuro all the time for himself? Wouldn't this mean, he would tie him to himself? 

What if Himuro didn't want to? The purple head tasted the chocolate of his muffin slowly. There was suddenly such a strong desire to ask the boy this question but he sensed this could turn out harder than he thought. And the knowledge that he would have Himuro around him all the time made his heart jump in joy. Even if something in his mind was whispering to be careful, he wanted to ask Himuro.

Looking at his cell phone, the raven haired male was away for almost 2 hours and didn't messaged him once. Who was this friend anyway, Atsushi grumbled inwardly. He would wait another hour before making his way to his lover, excited and anxious at the same time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> mmmmm I'm truly sorry for my long absence...but I'm working finally and always come late home.  
> I mostly write on fridays or saturdays because I'm so tired during the week that I only eat and go to sleep in 2 hours.
> 
> However, I hope you didn't think that I forgot about this fanfiction!  
> I'm still having ideas for the plot and some kinks ^^ I just need more time...
> 
>  
> 
> thanks for reading and thanks for the kudos <3 !


	12. Meetings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Himuro meets a lot of people and gets himself a second job.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Himuro meets a lot of people and gets a second job!

"Holy shit..." Himuro cursed as he held the bill in his hand. "I really need a second job..." He sighed loudly. Paying rent in Japan was really expensive and he was glad his company payed the first 4 months. 2 more and it'll be his turn to pay his staying. 

He started to like the feeling of having someone close to him, someone who would wait at home for him and still...Was he enough? He was only the best an ordinary person could be. No outstanding skills, no perfect form. It was all just a fake.  
Maybe Atsushi needed someone who was also a miracle, just like the rest of his team?

Looking at the clock, he put the letter back on the table and made himself ready to go outside. His small apartment was cold and it smelled like loneliness. That familiar smell of absence, a pressure that made him walk quickly out of the room.  
It has been some time since he had seen Alex. He thought she must have been very busy in America which is why he didn't say a word that he'll be in Japan. Himuro could imagine that she would be angry at him for not telling her...

As he walked down the street, his eyes were looking for a shop with a want ad. His first job at the donut shop would begin next week so he needed to find a job for the nighttime. Something like a bar or a casino would be nice, he thought and looked out. 

This was the first time since a couple of weeks that he was alone on the move. He got into the habit of always having the purple haired boy with him that it actually felt strange walking alone. Totally strange. Himuro was the type of human who would do everything on his own, trying to create his independence and here he was, having this hole in his stomach. He really accustomed quickly to enjoy the presence of Murasakibara. 

Rubbing his eye, he tried to think about something differend. Something like what to tell Alex? The coffee shop he was walking to, was almost at the end of the city but was easy to reach with the bus. It'll only took 15 min and he was standing in front of the shop, peeking inside and looking out for a woman with long blond hair and a red pair of glasses. 

Just as he walked in, someone ran up to him. "Tatsuya!" A feminine voice rang to his ears. "I've missed you so much!" He already recognized it and could only squeeze his eyes shut as the woman caught him in a tight hug. 

A sweet scent of a feminine perfume surrounded him as he felt the warmth of her. That smell of a childhood friend. He smiled softly and put his arms around her, enjoying the feeling. "I'm happy to see you, too Alex." He said and got a kiss on his mouth. "Still the same, huh?" He chuckled after the attack.  
Alex smiled brightly at him and dragged him to a seat where she had been waiting for him. "Finally got you! I swear If we were in Taiga's apartment I would squeeze you to death! You're really hopeless." She sighed after letting go of him so that they could sit down. "Not telling me that you moved to Japan! Are you mad at me?" She made a pout.

Himuro shook his head quickly and had his hands before him. "No, no of course not! I didn't really moved here...It's just...I got a bargain where the sportscompany would pay my rent for some months. I wanted to tell you but it all happend so fast and look, I had a lot of uh trouble here. I thought you would be angry at me."  
Her green eyes scanned him like those of a mother's. "Besides, I'm not a kid anymore. I really was going to call you." She took a sip from her coffe and shoved the other cup towards his friend. "For you." 

"Oh, thanks." Himuro mumbled and let his cold hands get warm from the hot cup. "Trouble you say? What happened exactly? Is it better now? Gosh I have so many questions to ask!"

The raven haired male chuckled. "We have time. So yeah..." It was nice to talk in a different language with someone famliar and he really was in the mood to let some things out. "But FIRST..." Alex said while Himuro put more sugar into his coffee. "How is he?" She asked and smirked at his questioning face.  
"What? Who?"

"Oh come on, I know it!" The woman put her cell phone on the table and looked through her gallery until she found something. Turning it upside down and shoving it to her friend, she leant back. "Taiga send me this. He thinks this is your boyfriend." 

Tatsuya looked at the display and saw a picture of Murasakibara. It seemed Kagami took the photo after they met him on the court the other days. Alex whisteled amused. "Tatsuya you heartbreaker you! Having such a talented boy as your lover, BIG catch! Even though...he seems like a grumpy giant kid."  
Himuro knew that wasn't quite the truth. Atsushi might be grumpy and ignorant as he met him the first day he joined Yosen, but after the time the violet haired male changed. He smirked which let Alex laugh out loud. She put her chin on her folded hands and while looking at him, her blond hair fell around her face, letting her green eyes shine.

"Are you happy?" 

Himuro nodded slowly. "Yeah kinda...uh what I mean is, we're not that long together but I think It'll work out." He smiled but as the words left his lips, he felt something deep inside him that was laughing loudly. As if he knew that it was a lie. What a dangerous thought.  
The blonde titled her head and narrowed her eyes. "If not, I will come to his house and pay him a beating for hurting my Tatsuya!"  
"Oh come on, that's not necessary...and besides he's a titan!"

Her eyes widened. "Say, do you have a size kink?"  
Himuro almost spit out his coffe. "Gee, Alex!" He coughed and shook his head violently. "No I don't!" Good thing was, they spoke in Englisch. She laughed loudly, a nice rang to his ears. 

"Due to the picture, you must have met Taiga. How is it between you two?" Her tone was now firmer. "I'm worrying about you two."  
That talk again, Himuro thought. He just couldn't explain what was going on between them and yet he tried it several times. However, Alex still didn't understand. Maybe it all was just some stupid fight over who was more talented. Alex surely must have those thoughts in her head all the time, but to Himuro it was more than this.

"Alex..." He spoke out slowly, searching for words not to get angry like the last time they spoke about it. "No I really mean it." She dashed foward and took his hand. "I know you two are grown up, but I see you drifting apart from each other. I'm not going to talk about this anymore, but I want you to promise me that you're going to talk to him properly."

Oh yeah, mother instinct, he thought. "You talked to him as well, am I right?" She noddeed slowly. He hold her hand gently while smiling at her. "I promie you we will talk, but what's going to happen after it, is uncertain, you know that."  
The woman made a face as if she wanted to say something, but her mouth was closed. Nodding slowly, she leant back again. Of course, this would only satisfy her for some time, but she will ask again. Himuro knew her.

"Ok, now tell me where I can find a job for the nighttime?"  
Taking a sip from her coffee, she pondered for a while. "When I came here, I saw a wanted ad on a casino in the centre of the city. Looks like it's a very fancy one. You even can play billiard there too. Should I lend you some money?"  
"Thank you Alex, but It's really not neccessary. I should check it out later." 

As they talked about old things, Himuro really felt as if something warm was spreading out inside his stomach. He was lonely for such a long time, cut himself off from everyone. For what? That may sound stupid, but he did it to find himself.  
He wanted independence, his on security and thought he was able to life alone. Life proved him wrong. No matter how many times he would try to live all by himself, something would pull him right back to his desire, to have someone close to him. 

Gosh, why does he had to be so complicated? There was not a single day that he not wanted to bang his head against a wall or the hard cemented ground. Why couldn't his heart adopt the truth, that maybe someone wanted him as well? He just couldn't, always had been on the run, away from people.  
Alex and Taiga were the only two friends he would open up. All the other stuff, like flirting or talking with people was his perfect veneer. Like his poistion on the court, he was faking everything. His smile, his condition, his talent. That was, what he exactly was. 

He lived his life, not knowing what he was actually searching for. He made it himself all difficult, he knew that. That's why he always admired Taiga for being s carefree. Well, he was the one who would make him carefree by taking all the burden on his shoulders. He was more the type, who would love to take care of a beloved one, than let someone take care of him. 

Like time flew, it was almost 9 pm and they decided to meet another time again. "Oh Tatsuya, I dreamed that you were a girl." Her eyes were shining. "I really would love to see you in-" She cut her off, by holding her mouth. "Really? Do you maybe wish to have a daughter?"  
Alex chuckled lightly. "Maybe. but we really should go shopping together."  
"So you will put dresses on me, I guess?"

She snapped with her fingers. "You say it." Himuro rolled with his eyes. The last time they did this, was almost 10 years ago when he and Tiaga were small. Kagami would laugh at him but it made Alex happy, so he did anyway, letting her do his hair and putting on dresses and skirts on him.  
"Text me when we can see each other again. And than I will see your flat, okay?" Himuro agreed and said goodbyye to her, walking outside the coffe shop. He took the next bus which would drive him to the centre of the city.

The town looked so pretty at night with all the lights and so many people still walking outside. The casino was shining brightly as well, he could already see it from his bus station. Red letters that said "Miragen" and big windows made of polished glass showed the fancy inside. Everywhere was a red carpet and a beautiful chandelier.  
An there it was, the wanting ad with an internet adress. Walking inside, he knew in this casino must be very rich people. Walking up to a tall man with bright blond hair, he asked if he could submit his applification.

The man who introduced himself as Toshiro, smiled brightly at him. "Oh my! You're really handsome. I think you would fit in this job pretty well. What is your name?" He must be around 5 years older due to his voice, but his appereance made him a bit younger.  
"I'm Himuro Tatsuya, nice to meet you Toshiro-san." He bowed down. Looking around, he saw people playing poker, billiard and dart. There were even business people in suits with beautiful waitresses. 

"You can give me your applicationor send it to me mail adress. When would you like to start?" That was prettyquick, Himuro thought. But no time to ponder about it, he took out his cell phone and typed the mail address into it.

"I'm very flexible, but I would prefer to work t night, if it would be possible?"

Toshiro grinned widely, showing his white teeth and running a hand through his striaght hair. "That's great! We're currently searching for someone who would help us during the night time! The co-chef and me, were searching like mad for someone like you! Oh he will be delighted to see you!"  
He took Himuro's hand in his. "Say, it's a bit sudden, but can you come tomorrow at this time again and send me your application today? We're short on stuff during the night time. All our ladies and gentleman were switching to the day time..."

Feeling the warmth on his hand, Himuro blinked several times. "Oh of course! I'll be here at the exact same time. But I guess, you have a dress code?"  
THe blond nodded. "Yes we have! But don't worry we will give you a suit." He beamed at him. "You really saved us Himuro-san! I'm happy to see you tomorrow again! I'm going to show you everything."

Justt as he walked in, he walked outside again after the short but lively conversation. That man was really pretty. He could work as a host as well...However, Himuro was happy that it all went so smoothly. A bit too smoothly, but oh well...maybe life meant it good with him?  
Walking back to the bus station, he grinned. It went good, he managed to get another job and would be finally be able to earn some money and pay his rent. It wasn't a bad start to make provisions and save some money.

Driving back home, he noticed a group of boys that were sitting behind him. They were talking loudly and at some point, he felt the urge to turn around. He sensed they were looking at him. A group in his age, looking rowdy were grinning at him. One with narrow eyes, pushed his sleek black hair back, while grinning devilishly.  
"We almost mistook you for a short haired girl." He said, waiting for Himuro's answer. The said man reamined calm. He sensed the tension inside the bus. It felt like he was in America, back than when he used to have street fights. "Well, happens."

There were other people inside the bus, so it would be pretty bd if he had to use his fists here. The boy who talked to him titled his head and looked back to his friends, muttering something about "boss".

Himuro was glad that it sttayed like this. Those boys looked like he wouldn't want to meet them again, especially when he was all alone. Stepping outside the bus, he walked to his apartment. By now, it has been around 10 pm. He didn't intend to be out for so long and as he walked the stairs up, he took out his cell phone again only to see that Murasakibara had been calling him.

"4 Times?" He grimaced. "oh shit!" Opening the door, he sit down on his bed and tried to call back, but couldn't cme through. He hoped the giant wasn't mad at him. Typing a message, he went to the kitchen and began to search for his application.

Murasakibara shouldn't know about his second job, neither should Alex. Having two jobs, on in the daytime and one in the nighttime would be going to be stressful, but he needed it. He hoped he could arrange some days where he wouldn't have to do both.  
After an hour, Atsushi still hadn't messaged him back, which made Himuro furrow his brows. He was tired and pondered why his lover wouldn't text back. Soon, he was drifting to sleep with a head full of worries.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh dear it's been while...I have to apologize for my long absence. (i know I say this everytime but it's true)  
> Life keeps me pretty busy and pushes me away form my stories and my beloved OTPs :(
> 
> Thank you all for your patience! *hugs you tightly* I will reward you with a smut scene!  
> And holy moly, after seeing the kudos, I was pretty surprised that so many people read this story *-*
> 
> (oh and sorry for making Himuro into a depressive mess, I kinda mixed myself with him because I like him the most...uhm...yeah)
> 
> hehe...can you already guess who's going to come next ;) ?


	13. curse of the figment

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> woah there, Atsushi you fool! Delusion kills you...!

Atsushi yawned as the Yosen player hand him over the papers. Fukui crossed his arms before his chest and gave the giant a long stare. "What am I suppose to do with these?" The giant titled his head. "Those are your results form the coach. It shows that you lack attention, as always. BUT!" The point guard held up a finger. "From time you time, whenever you're paired up with Himuro, you seem to focus only on him, which can be positive and negative. The coach asked me to talk about it with you."

The giant raised a purple eyebrow. "What does the auntie want?" He growled almost while looking down at the blond. "What does that mean?" Fukui sighed, and took the papers back. "I don't know what the coach is thinking, but I think, that you're having mood swings. You've changed somehow since Himuro joined our team. At first I thought you were going to kill him but than you somehow managed to stick with him and now you two are always together." He rubbed the back of his head. "Well to me, it looks like you're couple. They way you stare at him is sometimes creepy. As if you want to eat him alive and as I said, you keep focusing only at him, mostly during games. Which is good because you two are our aces ya know? but sometimes it's like...uhm you can't wait until the game is over for you know what I mean."

Murasakibara titled his head. He knew Fukui was straight forward as always and he actually nailed it. "What If I told you, that's how it is?" His team member wasn't surprised and smiled. "Well, that's good for you two, but still, keep the game in mind and let Himuro lead you so that the coach stops giving me hell, okay?"  
He passed the giant and gave him a firm slap on his shoulder. "And be careful not to crush that boy." Atsushi's eyes went big and he immediately followed him. "What do you mean by that?" They were walking through the city. It was Fukui who called him in the moring, saying there was something important to discuss. 

"I mean what I said." Fukui answered. "I have no idea how much you know about Himuro, but to me he looks like the ladiesman. You know, at the first sight. Someone who is friendly and polite to everyone, but never letting them too close. But sometimes I have the impression he has his difficulties in just being himself. After all, I know he has been a streetfighter in America. must have been tough."

As Atsushi listened, he actually was glad that the blond wanted to meet him. Usually, Murasakibara wasn't in the mood but as he heard Fukui speaking, he hoped he got some informtion about Himuro. He knew very well that the raven haired male was distant, even now when they're a couple. However, he didn't knew anything about the fighting stuff.  
"I heard it from Nijimura. In my opinion, your personalities clash together but somehow you two seem fine. I wonder about that but still, I'm glad. It's like Himuro is nurtures you." The boy laughed but Atsushi was quiet. "I'm sure you'll learn a lot form him, don't you think so?" He poked the Yosen center in his side. 

After a long pause, Atsushi stared ahead of him as they walked. "Am I too much for him?" Fukui stopped and made Murasakibara stop as well, looking at him. "Where did that come from?" Now it was the point guard's turn to title his head in confiusion. A soft smile appeared on Fukui's lips. "What do you think?" Atsushi only shook his head. "I can imagine your relationship isn't as easy as it it seems. But still, you two will work it out."

Violet orbs blinked down. "I...don't know how. I don't understand what is going on between us." He slowly spoke out, making Fukui look at him form the side. They walked to the train station where Fukui had to say goodbye. He turned around and patted the big guy. "Listen, I'm not doctor love so I can't give you any wise tips. The only thing you two need is more time. You two have to take care of each other. Oh there comes my train! See you, Atsushi!"

Before the purple haired player could answer him, Fukui already jumped into the train, walking directly to a free seat before the japanese lunchtime rush followed him.  
Yeah, he was right. He needed more time with Himuro. That's why he would love to live with him in a nice apartment. But would Himuro want too? Atsushi knew he could call Akashi to take a look at Himuro. 

Akashi had the special eye to see through people in only once quick glance. But Atsushi wanted to find out every detail about Himuro on his own. Discovering his layers until he would reach the core. That's why letting anyone having an eye on him was deadly. For them.  
He pondered and turned around. Actually, there was a small apartment free, near the basketball court. Walking to that place, he mustered the view and wondered if Himuro would like it. Suddenly he noticed, he didn't ask himuro about his workplace.

He knew the raven haired beauty would attend one soon but didn't say where. Typing in his phone number, he heard the mailbox. At this time, he tried it over and over again, wondering why Himuro didn't answer.

The other day, when they woke up together and Himuro told him he had to meet someone, he wondered why he didn't ask who it was. not that he was jealous...but still.... He shook his head, leave him his free time, his mind told him. He needed it.

The Yosen center strolled through the city and did his grocery shopping, giving himself time with picking the best candy until a thunderstruck, hot and fast hit his heart. Wide eyes scanned the scene until his brain recognized what was going on. Violet orbs however couldn't take it, no didn't want to see what happened right there behind those glasses of an ordinary coffee shop. 

A blond woman was kissing his Muro-chin right on his lips and he didn't even back away. Atsushi almost tripped over his own feet as he looked accidentally and noticed them. He had to look twice at the scene as he was strolling through the streets. What was that? What does that mean?  
The miracle player stopped and blinked at them, only to let out a a heavy sigh through his nose. He would make a very good dragon. Anger gripped his heart and made his eyes appear animallike. His feet began to stomp towards the shop, ready to burst through the wall.

How dare that woman touch his lover? Was she better than him? Atsushi stopped immediately, startling some pedestrians that passed him. Maybe, that's why Himuro didn't answer his calls? Maybe he was getting tired of him and searched for a beautiful and smart woman?

Atsushi shook his head and slowly turned around, walking away from the scene. He thought, he should go there, grab his lover and walk away with him. But what if he was happy with her? His heart was bleeding, pounding painfully hot in his chest. As in trance, he walked to his house, right into his room and sat down on his bed, struggling what to think now.

Would Himuro really deceive him? But why would he do it behind his back? Was he not enough for him? So many questions that made his head fall into his hands. He ran his fingers through his hair, almost scraping his scalp as anger mixed with sadness together into a wave of confiusion.   
This was, what he feared the most. Maybe Atsushi squeezed Himuro to much with his love and attentionseeking. Was he too needy? But that was true, he wanted that boy only for himself, every day of his life. 

He gritted his teeth together as his jaw turned stiff. His head was filled with so many questions that he had no idea what to think at all. His beloved Muro-chin...he would never...but would he? Atsushi didn't want to think bad of Himuro, he refused to. But why did he have to saw this?  
His eyes opened slowly, looking for something in his room. As if the answer was here to find. What was not okay with him? Maybe he was too childish? Himuro always acted so mature around him which made him appear more childlike than ever. 

It was true, Atsushi had no curves and he always touched the raven haired boy whenever he wanted, which was almost always. But that's how it was. With all his might, he wanted to show his love for this boy. So where did he go wrong?

Maybe...he had to change himself. He didn't want to lose Himuro. Atsushi stood up again and pulled out his cell phone, typing in a certain blond's number.  
"Murasakibaracchi! What a surprise!" He heard the model's happy voice. "Ki-chin, can I ask for a favour?" The giant player knew Kise could be tiring, but he belonged to his closer friends and the people he used to meet the most. Besides, Kise wasn't a bad guy. He just had his little idiosyncrasies.

Kise let out a surprised tone. "A favour? Well of course, I'm happy you're coming to me! What is it?" Murasakibara closed his eyes tightly. "Can you help me....become a...gentleman?" Silence. After some minutes, the violet player furrowed his brows. "Ki-chin?"

As if the blond had been shocked, he inhaled sharply. "Wow...to hear that from you!" He heard a light giggling. "What happened to you? You're the guy who isn't interested in anything at all, so what came over you?" 

Kise seemed to be amused and thrilled, hearing his friend's answer. So yeah, Muraskaibara had to tell him what happened. At least, the most important stuff. "Look...I uhm...I have a lover and I want to impress him, because there happened something I'm angry about. So will you help me?"

It sounded like Kise made a backflip, or through his cell phone in the air. "REALLY? Oh my good, Murasakibaracchi! I'm sooo happy for you! I'm kinda surprised but wow! Who is it? Is she nice? When did you meet her?"

Atsushi stared at the wall in his room, an annoyed expression on his face. "There is just one thing I want you to know. I'm not gonna tell you his name, until I got what I wanted."  
"Ohhh...it's a boy? I guess he's super handsome! And most importantly, very patiently..."

Atsushi smiled weakly. "Yes, he's beautiful. But hey, what was the last part? Do you want me to crush you?" He heard his friend laughing again. "Oh no no no, just come to my place tomorrow and we can start! Oh boy I'm so excited! But please, introduce him to me when you settle things, okay?"

The taller male sighed. "Yeah, I will. See you tomorrow." Hanging up, he let the cell phone fall on the bed. Damn, how he wanted to touch Himuro right now, leaving his scent over that boy and claim him over and over again. He closed his eyes and growled inwardly. He will do anything to get him back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know the chapter is quiet short but I wanted to finally update something so you guys don't have to think I'm dead... o.o  
> work keeps me busy and takes care of my nerves ... 
> 
> (PS did you know? I once wanted to write a oneshot between Himuro and Fukui...)
> 
> ...and guys THANK YOU SO MUCH SO SO SO MUCH FOR THE KUDOS! I never expected people would like this  
> story, I'm moved :')


	14. young business

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kise a serious chef? Nah...  
> Himuro in a dress and ALex, the pedo

Himuro sighed quietly as he stood in the changing room. Wearing a dress only for a childhood friend sure was streneous. For his stature, the dresses he tried on were just too tight and had a wide cleavage. 

He wasn't busty like Alex, he pouted and peeked through the gap of the curtain, tugging on the dark red dress. Is...the coast clear?" He almost spoke to himself as Alex came up to him with a pile of clothes on her arm. "Alex, what is that?"

His eyes widened as he saw the stockings. "Oh pleaaase! You have to put them on! They fit perfectly to that dress!" A murky grey eye scanned her face. "You're not joking..." He sighed again and took it from her as in trance. "You know, I would prefer trying that stuff on at home."  
The blonde just beamed at him. "That's won't do, Tatsuya! Besides, I can search for new stuff while you're changing. So, how do you feel? When you were little you looked like a girl! I almost thought you could go as my daughter."

She laughed and pulled out her cellphone to take a few pictures of the male. Himuro jolted and turned around. "Alex! Why are you taking pictures without asking?!" He covered his face. "And besides, when we were little I didn't put on some sort of lingerie or something. Otherwise you could go as a creepy pedofile woman, If you know what I mean."  
Now it was Alex's turn to be shocked. "What are you saying? I would never do that! I just see what a handsome man you've become!"  
"So that's why I have to wear dresses again...oh I see!" Himuro faked his voice as if he understood everything. Grumbling to himself, he jolted again as Alex groaned loudly. She pushed herself to the cabine an tipped on his chest. "You know why we're doing this! I just have a nostalgic fever and since we haven't seen each other for quiet a time I thought this would be fun."

Himuro chuckled lightly. "I know, I was just kidding." He smiled softly at her which melted the woman's frown. Her eyes went down to his uncovered collarbone and whistled. "Woah, Tatsuya," She grinned. "That boy is really head over heels for you huh?"  
The raven haired male blinked several times before Alex toughed his cheek. There were 4 very dark marks on his skin. He got used to Atsushi's habit of doing these on him. "Are you okay?" As if he woke up from a dream, Himuro shood his head and touched her hand. "Yeah, he's very caring."

Alex searched something inside his eyes before she nodded slowly. "That's how it should be or else I'll make fire under his giant butt!" Himuro laughed out loud and surprised her with that. A battle between a titan an a lioness. That would be interessting and fearsome at the same time.

"I need to go now." Himuro told her earlier about his first job but not about his second one. He knew, she would be worried and that's what he wanted to avoid. He changed himself into his normal clothing while Alex sat down on a chair in fornt of the cabine.  
"Oh, the donut shop? I can visit you someday.Text me how it went, okay?" Himuro assured that. Yeah, she would be very worried just like back in Amercia when Himuro earned his momney with street fights. 

No matter how close they were, there were still some things, he couldn't bring over his lips. He wanted to tell her about his fear of not being good enough, of the fear not being able to pay the rent and mostly, why he felt so annoyingly weak lately.  
Those things were locked in his heart and he didn't dare to even think about them. It was just like his basketball style. He could fake everything and no one would notice a thing until the part where someone by accident would find out.

That's they way he was living.  
They hugged each other tightly outisde the shop. "Will you be okay, Tatsuya?" She titled her head as Himuro grinned back. "When was I not okay?" With that and a light punch to his shoulder, they parted.

"Don't forget to text me more often. I don't want you to lose yourself inside your own head." Himuro thought about her words as he was sitting in the bus, riding to the casino. "You tend to cut yourself from everyone." She said. 

The Yosen ace just shrugged his shoulders. "Life just keeps me busy." Alex nodded, but gave him a hard stare. Himuro blinked outside the window and watched as the world passed him by. "Crap." He cursed quietly. I should've told her to delete those pictures. I hope she doesn'T show them Taiga, he thought.  
As he made his way to the casino, he wondered it Atsushi was angry at him for not answering his phone. He really wanted to see him but right now, he needed to work for his future. Rubbing the back of his neck, he walked slowly to entrance of the fancy building. 

He actually never liked the one-armed bandit or usual arcade games. But he liked playing billiar and the fancy atmosphere. Walking through those heavy doors with a black frame and a golden doorknob, he felt like he was diving into a new world.

The expensive chandeliers, hanging from the ceiling casted a white cold light at the dark red carpet, making it appear as if only rich people were allowed to come here. Right in the middle of the giant entrance was a porter. A tall man with white hair whom he already known as Shirotani. 

Himuro couldn't wait to get his wokring unfirom! His usual clothes made it clear, that he was a lost soul. Shirotani looked at him from afar and smiled softly. "Himuro-san! Good to see you, Kise-san told me you would come." Himuro greeted him back and bowed down. "Nice to see you, too Shirotani-san."  
The white haired male shook his head. "Ah you're so formal! Call me Shiro." Himuro blinked. Well, they didn't know each other well, but he seemed to be a nice person. As he had been lead by Shirotani, Himuro pondered.

He knew there was someone named Kise Routa from the Generation of Miracles from Atsushi an the others. His lover seemed to be good friends with him but almot never talked about him or the others. In fact, he seemed to be annoyed when someone asked about the GoM.  
And well, there was this captain, Akashi Seijuro who could be able to tame the giant...

"Nervous?" Shirotani asked as they walked slowly so that Himuro was able to see the depts. "A little bit." Himuro said honestly. "I would be lying If I would say no." The white haired male patted him on his shoulder. "Oh you don't have to be! Kise and the others are extremly nice and of course, I will take care of you."  
He winked at him, Himuro had the image that Shirotani looked a little bit too soft for this job. But the male had met enough people that proved that appereance was only a farce. They had to walk through the entire hall until the end of the building to walk up so some dark marbled strairs. 

The porter knocked before he immediately opened the door and gestured to Himuro that he should walk i first. The raiven haired male nodded and walked past him. "If you're ready, come back to me. I'll show you everything! And don't eat too much, you hear me?" 

He heard Kise tlaking to a phone and the door closed behind his doors. Letting his eyes through the dimmed room, he noticed the big office with the same furniture just like in the entrance hall. Dark red, black and gold were the dominating colors as well as outside.  
Kise wuickly finished his phonecall and turned around. "Himurocchi!" He beamed at him. The Yosen ace needed to get comfortable with his new nickname and tried to just went on with it. "Goodd evening, Kise-san." He said calmy after taking a deep breath.

His new chef stood up and walked upt to him. Just like Shirotani, the male was standing too close to him so that Himuro had to lean back. "I'm so happ you're here! I can already see it. You'll fit perfectly to the team and the job." That was quick, he thought. 

Kise didn't seem to be the strict chef he used to now in America. "Please have a seat!" THe blond walked back to his big chestnut colored desk and showed to the chair on the other side. Just as Himuro made himself comfortable in the leather chair, Kise took out a small staple of paper and looked at him.  
He really had the face of a model. The said male went quickly through his papers and began to introduce himself and the company fomrally. H e told him about the customers and what kind of people usually come at each time. 

He went on with special events of the casino, like birthday parties, stag parties, up to business meetings of any kind. It was really important to keep the guests entertained with ladies or men. Good company was the be-all and end-all, Kise assured.

"i know, It makes you think that this casino is almost a hostel." The blond laughed lightly. "And you'd be right. It's all about the customers and the entertainment." He put his chin on his hands as he looked closer at Himuro. "But you don't have to be positioned at this part if you don't want to. Even though, you really would fit in. BUT," Kise said loudly and leaned back. "I want you to be under Shirocchi's wings and be his assistent. He is my oldest employee and a very trustworthy man with a lot of experience."

Himur couldn't reply to that so he just nodded and listened patiently. The model went on about the working hourss, payment and difficult customers. "Difficult customers?" Himuro repeated ut could already guess what was about to come. "Yeah...sometimes we have some quests, even regulars, who can be a bit rough an tiresome. They pay a lot to be entertained here."

His stare got very cold for a moment. A rare sight, Himuro mustered him. shaking his head quickly, he turned to his friendly mood again. "Don't worry, I won't let you deal with them. Shirotani has a hard hand on them." He laughed again.

"I see. You have everything under control. I'm fascinated that the GoM and a famous model is actually the boss of an exclusive casino." The Yosen player stated which made Kise grin. "It wasn't easy but Akashicci helped me a lot. He's the one who told me to do it. He's got a hand for such business." 

Akashicci? That must have been the famous Rakuzan captain, he thought. Even the mighty head of the GoM has got funny nickname. "Kise-san. I'm really interested into having this job. Back in America I came around a lot of work places and I would like to help you but I can only work on friday and saturday. I already have a daytime job."  
Kise's amber eye's widened in joy. "A nightshifter? That's perfect! You see, I'm not the typical boss, so let's drop the formalities. I really would like to have you in my team. Do we have a deal?" Kise shoved the papers to Himuro.

He scanned the contract with his eyes and signed it. There was no option in saying no. "I'm glad If I can be of help." He answered and shoved it back to Kise.  
The model nodded. "Oh I'm sure you'll be! Besides, you can change your position anytime. You know, from ordinary business to entertainment assistency. That position is getting paid more." 

Entertainment? "Thank you for your offer. I'll start under Shirotani-san." The blond put the contract into his drawer. "Of course." He smiled and and pushed a button that was on his desk. He bowed down down to a something that looked like a speaker and called for the white haired male. 

"Shirocchi will show you around now and introduce you to everyone.If you have difficulties, just come to me or to him." Hirmuro stood up and bowed down. "Of course." The blond smiled again. "So formal." He said to himself as Himuro turned around and walked outside the door where Shirotani already was waiting.  
"Shall we?" The taller male smiled.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *touches own chest* my god...*gasps gently* the kudos...uh so much love form you guys...I'm moved :')  
> that screams for a new smut chapter! 
> 
> thank you for reading !  
> and thank you for your patience!


	15. Impressions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tell me honestly, do you think my writing style is depressive?  
> I just, I guess I have some crisis again :'D

Himuro's pulse was steady, so painfully steady as he smiled politely at everyone. The elegant music in the background was supposed to be distracting, to Himuro it just added more pressure on his shoulders. It's like the music forced him to have the same beat even if he wanted to collapse internally. 

He met over 30 people from different divisions and already forgot the first names as Shirotani introduced them. At least, he felt more fancy wearing a suit. Besides, Shirotani was extremly nice to him, almost cautious.

But still, the Yosen player was nervous as hell. He never have seen so many business people inside a casino, making future plans or just having a nice time. He tried to observe everything and everyone to manage the situation. 

"Still nervous?" Shirotani stood next to him as he guided him to the last division. Himuro sighed out shakily and nodded. "Yeah...it's exciting." Nervestretching, he should have said.The white haired male hummed to himself. "I understand, it's a bit much for the first day, just don't sweat it."  
He claped his back firmly. "This will be the last division I'm going to show you. This one, is a bit special." Himuro thought he imagined seeing a light spark inside those blue eyes. Something deep inside that orbit that made him shiver. 

They walked a tight transient area that was plunged in dark red colors. Hearing from afar a deep bass, Himuro somehow had an idea where they were going. And his instinct had been right. As Shirotani pushed the black curtain aside, a thick cloud of smoke hit them softly in the face.

Both had to adjust to the different atmosphere and the foggy view while stepping inside. People of both genders were passing them by, wearing tight maid outfits that surely weren't allowed in an ordinary maid coffee shop. Considering their revealing outfits, they still looked very elegantly.  
"This devision is called 'serendipity'. As you can see, it's a bit..." Shirotani was looking for a right word as he scanned the view. "sensual." As the word slipped out his mouth, his voice got deeper and for a moment, Himuro saw that he was in thoughts.

The white haired male blinked several times and turned to face Himuro properly. All this time, the bartender was walking next to him, giving him short glances. Himumro wondered if he was alright because the first time he met this man, Shirotani was almost acting like Kise. So cheerfully and open.  
And there it was again. That honest and sweet smile on the man's lips. "Kise said you can work here if you want to move up the ladder. However, if you don't feel right to do it, you don't have to." The Yosen ace gulped heavily. 

He? Walking in such a permissive outfit, acting like a maid, sweet talking to strangers and doing god-knows-what in those single bedrooms. Those were high-class prostitutes and the basketball player was just an ordinary school boy. 

Suddenly, his chest fastened with knots as he was imagining himself doing this job. Shirotani must have notice the change in his reaction and touched him by his shoulder. "We won't force you. Let's go back okay?" 

Himuro swallowed again, shaming himself for the reaction. "I was just." He shooked his head slightly and followed. "I am fascinated by those people. It surely is not an easy work to do." Shirotani nodded. "They do their job really good and have a difficult past behind them. Akashi and Kise took them in and treat them diligently."  
Knowing from movies how protitutes lived, the basketball player could somwhow imagine it.

It was almost 1 am and the casino was full while Himuro followed Shirotani like a shadow. "You need to know, that we're like a family here." The white haired male told him. They walked around the first division right behind the entrance hall, issueing drinks. 

"There might be days when the tension can be greater, but no matter what, we help each other out. You can trust us, especially when when there are rude customers." He smirked at him which disappeared quickly as he looked into a certain corner.

"Speaking of the devil." Himuro followed his gaze to a certain table to the corner of the hall. He recognized both of the men due to their school uniforms. "Those are our 'favourite' guests." Shirotani grinded his teeth together. "Just show no fear towards them and treat them with a hard hand."  
He smiled again and put his hands on his hips. "I dealt with them many times before so I know how to treat them." He pressed Himuro some glasses into his hands and showed him where to put them. "I'll be right back."

Himuro took them quickly and stared at the other male how he approached the two basketball players, greeting them with a bright smile. The two men felt caught and grabbed the girls that were sitting next to them even tighter. It looked like they wanted to use them as a shield.  
Haizaki Shougo and Hanamiya Makoto, that was not a surprise that those two were spending time together. Himuro walked slowly to the tables Shirotani told him to put the glasses down without leaving the scene out of sight. He didin't know much about these two, only that both are almost always up to no good. And both liked to injure other players during the match.

Shirotani stared them right in the eyes, alternating whereas the other two were exchanging glances. They seemed to be annoyed which made the white haired male grin wider than before. Hanamiya didn't say a word, instead he looked around the crowed almost as if he wanted to appear absent.  
Himuro polished the table for the next guest and stared at the two. Suddenly he felt Hanamiya's eyes on him and jolted inwardly. Cursing himself for that, he averted his gaze and turned around. His shift was about to end in 2 hours and he was keeping good, even though his insides where tingling.

He wondered what Atsushi was doing since they haven't talked. Thinking about the purple haired male made him remember their last night. He felt creeping a slight shiver coming up his spine. It was dangerous thinking about that right now but he was alone and Shirotani was busy.

Polishing the bar and placing new drinks on the table for the customers, he imagined those strong warm hands on him and saw that muscular body before his eyes. Swallowing hard he stared for a moment to nothing in paticular until he met another pair of eyes on him.

Feeling caught, he shook his head slightly and saw again into those devilish eyes from the Kirisaki Daichii captain. Hanamiya seemed to be amused but Himuro gave him nothing. Smiling politely he didn't give him more attention as a woman asked him for another drink. 

She must have been around 30 years, dark brown hair to her waist and tipping on the desk with her sharp filed nail. "You must be new here, hm?" Her voice was surprisingly deep considering her fragile appeareance. "Indeed, It's my first day here."

She smiled with her full lips that were painted in red. "What is your name?" Himuro introduced himself, feeling glad that she started a conversation so that he didn't have to pay attention to those two men. While looking directly into her face, she appeared more chinese than japanese.

"I am Mioko, the opera singer from division two." Himuro needed a moment to remember that this division was called 'somnis' and nodded. The casino was way greater than it looked once you knew about the different divisions. 

She placed her chin on her hand and titled her head while swaying the liquid inside the glass. "I hope you have good start. Tell me, how did you get here? I guess you're not from around here."  
"You're right, I'm from America and moved here months ago. I was searching for a night job and found this casino. Shirotani-san came up to me, asking me If I want to join." The woman nodded. "He's pretty straight forward and Kise's best man." She gulped down the alcohol.

Himuro pointed to her glass, asking her silently if she wanted another one. She handed it to him, waiting until he poured the liquid inside. "I would like you to visit me sometimes. To me, it seems that you're a cultured man."

"Thank you." Himuro's eyes widened because of the compliment. As he looked at Mioko, he wondered if she had a bad day. The way she looked at her glass and the tiny sighs that escaped her mouth surely were a sign. "Mioko-san, is something bothering you? We don't know each other very well, but maybe I can help you?"  
This time, the opera singer widened her green eyes. After a mmoment she laughed quietly which surprised the male. "Handsome, polite and helpful. You're really a gentleman, Himuro-san." She streched her thin body only to go into her previous slack position back. "To me, it seems that you can get some help, too."

The way she spoke to him, made it appear as if she knew something. Some would say, Himuro looked pretty like a native japanese man but Mioko recognized that he wasn't from here. Maybe that was just her instinct but this question went under his skin.

Time to act. As he was about to open his mouth, Mioko cut him. "It's strange isn't it? People come to a place like this to get away from their everyday life. Some would play video games, others would go to the gym. In my opinion they are all the same. But tell me, what is this place for a worker like you and me?"

She took a sip from her glass and looked into Himuro's eyes. "We are actors, don't you think? I guess you observed the other workes. I tell you, every one of them is an actor in this business.They help these people here to get away form their thoughts and while they act, they are totally different. As if someone threw them into another dimension. Would you say this is a blessing or a curse?"

The Yosen ace was amazed by her words. He didn't expect her to get philosophic all of a sudden even though she seemed to be troubled. She was an interesting woman and so opposing. Of course, she didn't have to tell Himumro about acting. His entire life was a show where he was the one to act the way other people wanted him to. This or because of sheer selfprotection.

"I would say, it is a blessing." He answered, averting his gaze. "I think, It's like these people seek distraction as well. By helping others, they distract themselves from their own issues. Maybe, they can't help themselves but at least they feel needed."

Was he talking about himself? Maybe. The female narrowed her eyes while listening. Humming, she didn't leave him out of sight. "Yes, indeed."  
Himuro didn't know when those two basketball player left but he didn't notice it until Shirotani came back. Being behind the bar all the time and giving drinks out wasn't that hard and the time passed by quickly but still, it tugged on his energy. Adding, Mioko who was bringing him to weird thoughts.

"You're doing good, hime!" The black haired boy wanted to say thank you but stopped as he heard his second nickname. Shirotani greeted the opera singer while giving her a kiss on her palm. "We're giving each other names for the time here. So you'll be my hime." Himuro spoke japanese fluently so he knew what that word stood for and furrowed his brows slightly. 

"So...I'm a princess?" He asked shyly and titled his head. "May I ask what yours is?" Shirotani smiled down at him, leaning closer and touching his hand, almost giving him a kiss on his palm too. "I am the frosty prince." He stared into those ice blue eyes and leaned back for the sudden closeness.  
The other bartender came closer to him, pressuring him to the corner of the bar. Himuro's heart skipped a beat as he felt the desk on his back. "Are you going to be my partner here?" The other male was overwhelemed. He didn't know if this was a test, or a flirt or simply a joke. 

Shirotani seemed to be playful like Kise but there were moments, he could imagine him being merciless. "In this casino, we play our characters very well and everyone has his partner. So are you going to be my hime?"

Well, if this is what they asked him for to be a part of the group, could he really say no? Shirotani's smile was honest and warm which let Himuro's furrow disappear. He was an actor in his life to overcome any obstacle.

He smiled back, repainting his fear and his insecurity. "It would be an honor to me, Shiro-oji." The taller bartened looked at him surprised and laughed, letting go of him. He placed his hands on Himuro's shoulder. "Well well, that was a nice response. You're already took your part!" 

Mioko observed the two with a mischievous smile. Himuro stared back at him. Of course, what else should he do? "Sorry for my sudden attack. It was Kise's idea to test our novices and how they react. I think it's a mean move but you mastered it very well and I hope you're not afraid of me, thinking I'll be doing it again."  
"By no means." Himuro answered while putting his suit in form. Blue eyes met green ones. 

"Mio-chan, don't you have your day off?" The said woman put her legs about each other and tugged on her black dress.  
"You know how much I love the sound of the piano here. I came here to be spoiled and to work." 

"You're performance is next weekend, so Akashi and his lover will visit you." Her eyes beamed at the information. "What a pleasant surprise. You two should come as well. Maybe you switch position with another workers. It would mean a lot to me."

The white haired bartender faced Himuro. " Kise told me you'll be here on Friday and Saturday, am I right?" Himuro nodded. He would love to hear the woman's voice and seeing the famous Rakuzan captain and his partner would be a rare sight.  
"Very well then." Shirotani bowed down to him. "That was it for your first day. Thank you very muh for your help, I'm looking forward to the next weekend." He beamed at him. "I will organize two seats for us so that we can attend Mioko-san's show."

Himuro bowed down quickly, almost hitting his head on the table while saying thank you. "Don't inconvenience yourself!" Himuro realized how good it was to know he would be here only for two nights. He liked Shirotani for his personality but the pressure intense.  
Nodding, the bartender gave him a small chip with a bright red M on it. "This is your membership card. Every worker here has one. Don't forget this next Friday, I'll be waiting, hime." He winked and squired him to the changing room.

Saying goodbye to the opera singer, they walked together to the changing room and talked about the customers for a while and the other workers. Shirotani's looseness was back again. He seemed refresehed somehow. Maybe he punched Haizaki or Hanamiya in the face, Himuro thought and smirked.  
"It's a shame you'll be working here only on two days. But I guess, life keeps you busy enough." The raven haired boy laughed slightly."Oh yes it does. I looking forward to work with you too, Shirotani-san."

They said goodbye to each other as Himuro left the back entrance and walked to the bus stop. He felt kind of crushed. So many impressions, so many people and still, he liked it there. Every beginning is difficult.  
Either way, he needed the money. Getting an assumption so fast wouldn't happen another time. On monday he would have his first day at the donut shop. Getting payed for both jobs should be enough for an extension so that he could stay in his apartment. 

Atsushi didn't know that his contract was expiring. That company won't pay for his rent anymore so it was time to handle this on his own. Taking out his cell phone, he saw that the giant tried to reach him several times. 

It was now 5 am in the morning, Atsushi surely was asleep. That's why he decided not to call him back. Looking at the blackboard on the bus station, he saw that his bus would arrive in 3 min. Sighing out shakily, he sit down on the metal bench.

He blinked at the ground, recalling what he just experienced. Everything's going to be ok, he said to himself. But why was he feeling so empty? As if something wasn't ok at all. He had no clue. For every normal human being, it was natural to live on their own.  
Himuro still had to learn how to master it. He had his reasons why he left America and he knew how much it costed him to live on his own. Trying to enjoy the independence , there was still this heavy hole in his chest that won't leave him alone.

Distraction. Those two jobs would be the healthy distraction he needed. Stepping inside the empty bus, he walked to the end part. Another good thing was, that the bus ride took only 15 min to the casino.  
He walked down the street to his apartment, enjoing the silence on the way back. As he opened the front door, he decided to walk the stairs. Using the elevator would be awfully loud and he didn't want to wake up his neighbours. 

While taking the last steps he heard someone breathing and stopped. Walking slower he looked around the corner only to see Atsushi laying on the ground. He had his arms crossed before his chest and sat on the ground with his back to the door.  
Himuro blinked ungainly and walked up to the boy. Why in the world would he lay here? It was freezingly cold and besides, why didn't he just wait a home? Stepping to the Miracle player, he kneeled down to him.

Amazing, how he could sleep like this. "Atsushi?" He whispered touching his cheek. "What are you doing here?" He mumbled while Atushi opened his eye slowly. He looked like his wasn't in a good mood.

"You're finally back." He whispered and stared into grey eyes. "Good to see you." The other male furrowed his brows. "Why are sleeping here?" Atsushi took his time to reply. He streched his upper body and stood up, taking Himuro with him.  
"I wanted to make sure, you'll be home." Not knowing what to answer to this, Atsushi just leaned forward and kissed him softly on his lips. He touched the back of his head to drag him even closer. "I'll be going then. See you tomorrow."

As the giant let go of him, Himuro was just bedazzled because of his actions. He could only watch how Atsushi waved and walked the stairs down. It was like his mouth had been stapled. Why didn't he want to come inside? Besides, he didn't even see Atsushi's car.  
Was the other Yosen player planing to walk back home? Himuro could just shook his head and opened the door. As he changed his clothes and fell on his bed, his heart dropped down to his stomach.

What in the world was that?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> When I put Shirotani into this story, I had a clear imaginaiton of him. Now I just think of Decim from Death Parade, only with Kise's personality...strange...
> 
> wanna have a smut part? Well, you'll be getting one in the next chap!
> 
> Thanks for reading! Thanks for the love!


	16. A little bit too much

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> neeeee it's been a while, huh? Have a smut part ^^

Atsushi blinked at the ceiling, questioning his entire being. But still, what a beautiful silence. No babbling Kise in his left ear, no screaming girls in his right ear. Nothing. Just him and his bed. Since yesterday he thought that maybe asking Kise for help wasn't the best idea. "Sooooo annooooying...." He whined, stood up slowly and stretching his upper body. Rubbing the back of his neck he missed the feeling of having Himuro next to him. At least he got to see him before he went to bed and knowing he was home. Since that day, he couldn't stop thinking of that blonde woman and why Himuro came home so late. Maybe he was cornering him again? Himuro seemed to be the kind of person who needs his space but Atsushi often didn't want him to dissociate himself from him. The strong desire overcame him every time and holding back was unbearable.

It was like a penalty for him because Kise told him not to go over to Himuro's place but he just had to, even if it meant only seeing his face and giving him a quick peck. He went to the bathroom, brushed his teeth and splashed cold water on his sleepy face. Wondering if Himuro was actually mad, he walked downstairs. Of course, his parents weren't home which is why he often thought about letting Himuro to move in with him. The feeling of living with his lover was constantly on his mind and always surprising him that he was even able to think about stuff like that. As he searched for something inside the fridge, his mind wandered to Kise's lessons again. He did such strange things yesterday.

Things like holding the door open for people, picking flowers and giving them to some girls or trying suits on. It looked like Kise got a new toy. The violet haired male let his shoulders fall down. What does it even mean to be a gentleman? And what does this woman had what he lack? Maybe he should ask Akashi for help? His former captain however could use more radical techniques. He blinked several times before shaking his head violently. Akashi was plan B for emergency...maybe. When it came to excellent manners, Akashi was a professional compared to Kise. Atsushi was the only one of the Miracle players who knew how their captain lived his life. And he swore to him not telling anyone about this. He liked the small red haired man and his straight forward attitude, purging any hindrance. His eyes looked around for something sweet as he heard a ring.

Closing the fridge again, he opened the door and looked into a beloved murky grey eye. His face lit up immediately. "Muro-chin...!" He smiled softly, holding the door more open. The smaller male gave him a strange look which Atsushi couldn't identify. Was he reading him? He didn't look angry nor sad but maybe thoughtful? The raven haired boy looked around before speaking. "Good morning Atsushi, are you alone?" His lover nodded and let him inside. Himuro saw that Atsushi must have just gotten up due to his dark grey boxers and his white shirt. He mustered his muscular legs than his groin and went up to his still sleepy face and bit his inner cheek. What a sight.

The slight anger from yesterday just blew out slowly. He didn't sleep very well this night. Lots of thoughts were running through his head, making him wake up every hour. "Can we go to your room?" He asked and saw Atsushi nodding immediately. "Of course." As they walked to Atsushi's bed, Himuro sat down next to him, looking at the ground. He was collecting his thoughts and blinked several times. "What...was that yesterday?" He asked with a slight frown, now looking at him. Violet orbs blinked, seeing confusion on his lover's face. That was when Atsushi saw the dark circle under his eye."How long have you been sitting there? Y-you really should have come inside instead of walking home at this hour." Atsushi smiled again which let Himuro realize that this guy never used to show any other emotion besides annoyance or boredom. But his smile really suited him.

The giant scanned his face and both knew that this situation was kind of tense. They felt that the other had something on his mind, reading the atmosphere and waiting for the right words to pop out. So yeah, what should Atsushi tell him? He saw the woman's face before his eyes again and inhaled deeply. "I...um...I thought maybe you wanted your peace since you came home so late." In fact, that was Kise's doing. He told him to give Himuro his space and back off, playing hard to get. The model told him to keep his distance so that Himuro would come to him. Pff, as If, Atsushi thought. And what should Himuro reply to this? It was his fault.

He didn't answer any of Atsushi's calls and didn't tell him where he would go. Well, he couldn't. "Ne, Muro-chin If you didn't want o be with me anymore...you...you would say so, hm?" Himuro's eyes went wide as he faced the Miracle player. He was expecting that Atsushi would ask him where he was lately and why he didn't answer his phone but this question was out of place."Why are you asking that all of a sudden?" Shouldn't he be the one saying something like this? If Atsushi only knew what was really going on... He clenched his teeth lightly together, concentrating on his breathing. Atsushi moved up his arm and touched Himuro's cheek with his hand, stroking the skin with his thump. He stared at his lips. That woman dared to kiss him right there! The corner of his mouth twitched.

Speaking his mind, wasn't that what Kise told him? If you want to be a real man, speak your mind and explain yourself. "I saw you with a woman. She kissed you so I was wondering for a while...I'm not...you see I just uhm..." Now it was the black haired male's turn to be surprised. The giant used his other arm to rub his neck again while he averted his gaze. Himuro's insides were cringing. He must have seen how Alex kissed him and thought he had a date! He opened his mouth and shook his head. Of course! That's why he called so many times! He slapped his forehead, making Atsushi startle. "Atsushi! I'm so sorry...that woman was my former basketball teacher and a very close friend. She likes kissing people, I should've told you about her but I've been so busy lately. I'm such an idiot!" His lover mustered him, sighing loudly.

"I'm so glad!" He started laughing and fell on his back. He made himself so crazy because of her and now it turned out it was just a friend! Himuro swallowed hard as he looked at him with guilt in his eyes. "I'm sorry for not answering your calls. You see, I'm not always on my phone. I must have worry you a lot!" Atsushi just smiled mildly. Yeah, he went crazy the last days. How nice that Himuro solved the problem just like that. Himuro leaned over him, giving him a light kiss and looking down at him with wide eyes, scanning the other male's face. This one was calm, almost tired as Atsushi looked up at him. He licked his lips and made a little pout. Damn that looks way too cute, Himuro thought and swallowed hard. "She kissed you...I really was about to walk up to you two and crush her but...but I thought maybe you-" He felt Himuro's finger on his lips. "I'm so sorry..."

Himuro almost whispered. "Don't think anything else. I really am in, uh I really like you very much." Seeing how those pale cheeks got red was always a cute sight, Atsushi thought. He could imagine it that it was hard for his lover to say those words. He didn't know why but using the famous 3-words was hard for him, too. He liked it more to express them instead of saying them. But maybe both will be able to say them some time. "Let me make it up to you." The Miracle player closed his eyes while concentrating on the brief kiss that turned into a passionate tongue kiss. He exhaled during the act and rubbed his tongue against the owner's.

The eagerness that became Himuro, surprised him and he already liked it. He let Atsushi make himself comfortable on his bed and sat on top of him. Leaning down again, he kissed him on his neck while mumbling something incoherently. Closing his eyes, he inhaled the bigger male's scent. He felt the touch of his lover's hand on his back, rubbing him slowly. After a while, Atsushi grabbed him and squeezed him tightly. This love seemed to be much more tensed up. Both knew that and Atsushi really hoped that Himuro would someday open himself up more to him. But he was confident that he was making progress. On the other side, Atsushi wanted to show him that he would never leave him or harm him in any way. If he only wouldn't be so clingy...

As Himuro felt those strong arms around him, he closed his eyes, swallowing down his worries. He sneaked his right arm down Atsushi's side and grabbed his groin. His lover bucked his hips lightly up. "I want to spoil you." He breathed against the giant's neck, making him shiver. Helping the taller male taking off his shirt, Himuro sat back, admiring his upper body. He almost drooled while running his cold hands down the athletic body.

He kissed a path down his navel and stroked the violet hair that disappeared into his pants. Looking up again, his gaze met violet orbs. He smiled which made Atsushi's stomach tumble in joy. Pale fingers opened the button of his pants and pulled the zipper down. He pushed both of his lover's pants down and revealed his half hard member. Himuro's always surprised that something so big fit inside of him, and he loves it. He could say, he got addicted to it. Atsushi's scent, his size, his voice everything about him. Even though he was afraid of so many things. He took Atsushi's manhood in his hand, feeling the hot member twitching because of his cold hand. "A-are you teasing me?" Atsushi laughed and made the other male blush. "I'm sorry. This will be better." The Miracle player choked on his laugh as Himuro got down on him.

The hot mouth around his member felt much better which made him move his hips lightly. He would love to grab Himuro's head and push it down but that would be too much of a force. But still, he grabbed black strains of hair and massaged the scalp while enjoying the feeling. How that hot moist mouth worked between his legs made him moan and encouraged the kneeling boy. This thing however, fitted inside him but not in his mouth so the smaller male had to angle his head and licked the length up, stopping at the end and sucking on it. Himuro never imagined that giving someone a blowjob could actually make him hard. But this wasn't just from anyone. It was Atsushi's and that alone was making him hot. He grabbed himself through his pants while making sure Atsushi was all slicked up. Looking up, he saw Atsushi's flushed face and kept on.

He licked and sucked until his lover was squirming, just until he could guess that the Miracle player was on the edge. Sitting back, he first took of his shirt before he stood up to get rid of his own pants while Atsushi's eyes were on him. Giving his big lover a shy smile, he sat down again but this time he sat down on Atsushi's stomach, showing him his back while he pressed their hard members together. A violet eyebrow rose but admired the pale back in front of him. At first he steadied himself on his elbows but as soon as Himuro moved, he slipped. Feeling his member against Himuro's was amazing. He was equally hot and the friction was just perfect. Himuro heard his lover behind him gasping and moaning and was pleased with himself, he just needed to... He had been interrupted as soon as Atsushi grabbed his hips.

He pulled his rear to his face while Himuro almost fell forward, his own face now close to Atsushi's member again. "I want to spoil you too." He said breathlessly before he licked the puckered hole. Himuro let out a high pitched noise and arched his back as he felt the tongue entering him slowly."I-impatient...are we?" In the end, it overcame Atsushi again. It was hard for him just to sit and watch. He needed to touch, to lick, to mark to feel more.

They tasted each other, eliciting lovely sounds and enjoyed their moment. Atsushi just couldn't wait as he prepared the twitching hole in front of him. He licked it, sucked on it and pushed two fingers inside, slowly making a scissoring movement. Himuro was panting and gasping while he was caressing Atushi's member almost lazily. Thunderbolts were rushing through his entire body and gathering in the pit of his stomach as he started moaning. Even though the licking noises always embarrassed him, he tried not to show it. But his body was honest. "Yu sho cut..." Atsushi mumbled. He thrust his tongue inside, making the hole as moist as possible. The second Yosen ace never felt so hard before whiel his tip rubbed on the stomach underneath him."A-Atsushi...It's ok."

Himuro gasped and moved away from him. His lover looked at him curiously after Himuro turned around. They looked at each other's flushed faces and their hazy gazes met. That's when Himuro climbed on top of him again, kissing him tenderly while guiding his member behind him between his cheeks. At first, he was only rubbing and teasing while they kissed, enjoying the feeling of that hot manhood. "You're making me crazy, Muro-chin..." Atsushi growled and licked his lips. "Heh, that's my line."

What a sight, Murasakibara thought as he watched how his partner got down on him, taking his member inch by inch. His mouth was slightly opened and his eyes tightly closed. The expression on his face was more pain than pleasure. As soon as he sat down completely, Himuro's breathing was quick. He swallowed hard and Atsushi knew, he was fighting with himself. Fighting with the intruder inside his rear that felt sublime but was so thick and long that he couldn't breathe. The male underneath him held his hips, massaging the skin there. He sat up. "AH-!" Himuro's back arched so that his chest was meeting Atsushi's.

The sound of his high pitched moan rang through the his ears right to his member. "D-did you just g-grew bigger?" The raven haired boy rasped and threw his hands around the other man's neck. His lover was so impossibly deep inside of him that he could imagine having his member in his throat again. "It's your doing. You're squeezing me so tight." Violet eyes grew big as he saw tears gathering in the corner of Himuro's eyes. Pale legs were trembling heavily next to his own. Was he suffering? Panic caught the big boy. "Are you okay?" He asked out of breath but Himuro was only nodding strongly.

Yeah, it hurt a bit but that wasn't the problem. The smaller Yosen ace was suddenly filled with so many emotions that he just couldn't expel to the darkest corner of his mind. How was it possible that he could love like this and get the love back? It made him so happy that it hurt. Himuro himself didn't understand himself what was really going on. Everything was a little bit overwhelming. He had his eyes closed and fought the tears back but still, Atsushi saw them. He leant his face closer, licking the salty liquid away. "So good..." Himuro gasped and buried his face into the neck of his lover. "How you love me, what you do to me, _just everything_."

Atsushi's heart skipped a beat. Was Himuro actually confessing? He was opening up to him! He hugged him tightly and pushed upwards. Himuro moaned loudly as his special spot had been hit. With this length and this position, he was hitting him dead on, leaving him almost drooling. He moved his slender waist and rolled his hips, earning a groan. "Muro-chin." Murasakibara chanted his name over and over again, hypnotizing him completely. The pale boy felt like he was about to lose his mind. The heat inside him, around him, the friction, the noises, the scent, everything was utterly breathtaking! "I'm sorry, Muro-chin."

Atsushi kissed his forehead and grabbed his hips again after stroking his back. "I can't hold back now..." Just after he let out those words, his hips were moving on his own, driving Himuro crazy. Now his face was showing pure pleasure as Murasakibara glued his eyes to him. He kissed him sloppy on his mouth and swallowed down his cries and moans. With a deep guttural groan, Atsushi shot his liquid deep inside the other male. This one followed him quickly as he felt the hot shot inside of him. He pressed his legs against Atsushi's sides and jolted forward. "Ah shit, a cramp!"

Himuro had to push Atsushi down and angle himself a bit to avoid the knot in his leg. He felt the liquid running out of his hole, dripping on Atsushi. Both shivered. The taller male pulled out and put Himuro next to him, pressing them together and stroking his leg. "Better?" Himuro sighed heavily and nodded. "That was amazing." He smiled sleepy, melting Murasakibara's heart. "Yeah." He answered, nuzzling the black hair. "Are you really okay?" He asked again, while tapping lightly with his fingers on his back. Himuro kissed his lover on his jaw line. "Yes, don't worry." As they lay like this, Himuro was about to fall asleep until Atsushi broke the silence. "You know...I was thinking about several stuff." He sighed through his nose. "Would you like to move in with me?"

Waiting patiently for Himuro's answer, he was drawing circles on his back. The other male blinked, without thinking further. "That would be awesome." He smiled rubbing his face against that strong neck, making Atsushi grin inwardly. "I just don't know If I'm-" He stopped and tried again. "If we have the time now?" He didn't want to tell Atsushi about his financial situation. "Well...it was just an idea, we don't have to rush anything." Atsushi mumbled, pressing the male closer to him and feeling so incredibly happy. "Wanna eat something and talk about it?" He heard a tired chuckle. "Can I get dressed first?" After laying almost for an hour and talking about casual stuff, they eventually stood up, got dressed and cleaned themselves.

Walking down the stairs, Atsushi's stomach began to rumble which made his partner chuckle. "Looks like I interrupted your breakfast, hm?" The taller male walked past him and looked through the fridge again. "I wasn't even starting...besides I'm very happy that you're here." The raven haired man sat down and observed him. "Can I help you?" He asked while Atsushi was still looking around.

"It's okay. Are you up to omelet?" Looking over his shoulder, he saw that Himuro was nodding. "Sure, should I help you with that?" It's not like Atsushi couldn't cook. He may not look like it, but he could actually cook very well but he was almost always too lazy to do something but when Himuro was behind him, he wanted to show him his skills. "Only If you want to, but I prefer to cook for you." The sitting male titled his head and turned on the radio that was on the table, making Atsushi turn around. He looked into a smiling face and respond equally. As his tall lover was preparing everything, he noticed that Atsushi's entire stature was somewhat stretched.

He was standing with a straight back and he talked even more. Usually, he would give only half-assed answers and walk with a hump. "Ne, Muro-chin what happened to that red haired guy with the split eyebrows? What was his name again..." "Kagami Taiga." Himuro answered, putting his head in his hand. "He's something like my brother and we still have some things to settle." Atsushi just nodded. Even though he didn't like the ring around his lover's neck, he still thought that he won't intermeddle and his partner was glad that there were no further questions.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope you liked it ^^ Jeez...someone pointed out that my stories have too many grammar mistakes.  
> It's not that I can't handle criticism and I think I'm working sloppily lately....so yeah I'm rellay gomen..... 
> 
> I'm working on that issue! :)
> 
>  
> 
> thanks for reading and thank you so much for the kudos <3


	17. Salty Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> not what you think

Red eyes met a grey murky one. Silenc was so loud that it made both males uncomfortable. Furthermore it was raining and people were rushing past them to get a dry spot. But not these two. They were standing towards each other, all kinds of emotion on their faces while they got soaked with rain. The Seirin ace held a bag with groceries in his hand and a basketball pinned between his body and his arm on the other side. The other male however held nothing in his hands as he was about to enter the big grocery store. They met each other accidentally at the entrance even though it felt like a small impact. "Tatsuya." Kagami started but bit his inner cheek right after he said the name.

There was so much to talk about but only a few chances that they would meet each other. Himuro buried his hands in his pants and smiled lightly at his brother who was waiting for something. "Hello Taiga. I see your busy." His eyes looked at the plastic bag which Kagami held up immediately. "Ah yeah, I just finished..." Red eyes pierced his. "Did you know Alex is here? She's waiting in my house for me to cook her something." The black haired male nodded. "I met her a few days ago, talked about this and that." His little brother chewed on his inner cheek, averting his stare. "What about your sudden departure..." He murmured but Himuro could hear him. He gritted his teeth tightly.

That was a very tricky topic he didn't like to talk about but knew he owed Kagami an explenation just as well as Alex. At least he tried to be honest. "No." Kagami let out a short 'hmpf' and turned his head to the side. "I was wondering, if you..." He shook his head again. Himuro himself knew that the declaration he left back in America wasn't tasteful but they were children and he knew Kagami wouldn't understand him. He rubbed his thump with his forefinger inside his pants while searching for the right words. "I wonder if you would feel the same as your friends felt that day." A stab in his chest and Himuro looked up again. " How would he feel? How did they feel? Were they even friends? Kagami did not know that these so called friends were a gang of drug dealers, street fighter, simply a youth without future and he had been one of them.

He left America to find a future in Japan, to simply start a new life and leave all the toxic people and surroundings behind. Kagami did not know that he was notorious on many ghettos and those people would find him wherever he would be in America. He fucked up too much to restore his image or the way he was thinking. Whenever he was with that gang, his entire being changed. A sight he never wanted to show Kagami, Alex or Murasakibara. No one should ever see him in that condition. "Taiga...there are reasons behind this." He rubbed the back of his neck nervousely. "I know that it's the best just like things are now." Of course, his brother wasn't satisfied with such an answer.

Who would be? But how could Himuro explain that his older brother had been a drug addicted blighter who would get himself involved with other gangs and fight because of amusement and pleasure? Kagami would lose all respect for him and that would tear his heart apart. He cut his ties with the red head years ago to save him, to not get him involved with his idiotic way of life. The Yosen ace was master of acting. That was his way of playing basketball his entire life. He faked it until he would make it or not. The sheer illusion that he would have it all together, seen by the outside was enough. He swallowed hard and gave Kagami his gentleman-like smile while pointing at the basketball.

Their juncture. "I believe your potential is growing bigger." Something he couldn't make rise, no matter how hard he tried. "I'll be counting on you." From the corner of his dark apartment. With that he walked past Kagami, forgetting that he wanted to go to the grocery store. "That's all you've got to say." He heard the redhead behind him but kept walking. Somehow his legs didn't want to stop. It was pouring down and all Himuro could do was wearing the mask-like grin on his face. If he couldn't be happy himself, than he would be happy for Kagami. Seeing him having real friends that would be there for him, watch every step towards his goal. And Himuro? He got his two jobs now, a beautiful view from his apartment and a lover. A love he didn't know how to handle. He tried to hold it with kid gloves, not even realizing that it was real.

As he walked, he found himself at the river that ran down through the center of the city. Holding himself tightly on the railing, he watched how the water rippled. The grey semblance made it look like a giant pond in which too many people stepped their dirty shoes. Hot tears streamed down his cool face as he observed it. Surprised about this outburst, he wiped them away with the back of his hand. Why does his chest suddenly felt as if his lungs were about to twist like a screw. He felt so terribly lonely, and so guilty for all the things he had done in America. He felt bad for being the puppet he made out of himself that he couldn't help but scream his lungs out.

There was no one around him who would ask if he was okay, no one that would hug him tightly. It was only him and the quivering river. But it was good like this. He didn't want to bother anyone, didn't want people to see him in this state. And he was here, here in Japan. A new life, a new future so why couldn't he just smile? What was it that make it so hard for him to just go on and leave the past behind him. Was it the urge to taste blood or his hidden world-weariness, so that he would be able to feel that he was alive? Himuro changed his personality so many times just to fit in, or to overcome any obstacle.

How could he be proud of this life? It was all too mechanical and still there was a human being that loved him. But how was a broken soul even able to handle such a fragile thing? Was he good enough? How should he behave? Which expectations were upon him? Himuro just didn't know. He placed his elbows on the railing and buried his head into his hands. Why was it so god damn hard to life? The black haired boy exhaled shakily and streched his body. Wiping away any signs of sadness, he slowly walked back, freezing now. As he looked at his watch, it was 9:30 and slowly becoming dark. But he didn't feel like going back to his apartment.

That's why he walked through the city, trying to clear his mind and his emotion. He ven walked past the Miragen casino. From afar he could hear a group of laughing youths and when he looked closer, he recognized two of them. Quickly hiding behind a shop at the corner, he could see Hanamiya Makoto and Haizaki Shougo. Those two must have coming from the casino, heading home or elsewhere. Shirotani told him once that these fellows were up to no good no matter where they would stand and Himuro didn't even need to hear that to sense that they were troublemake. He turned around slowly and walked back. Heading past them wouldn't be a pleasant join up so he decided to head home. But destiny had other plans for him. "Hey you!" He heard Hanamiya behind him and closed his eyes in annoyance."Sweet."

He whispered and increaed the spped of his steps. "Oi, wait a second!" Another laughter and before he knew what was happening, someone grabbed him by his arm, turning him around. He jolted slightly backwards but the iron grip held him in place. Next to him was Haizaki, grinning down at him. How the hell did he caught up to him so fast? Hanamiya and his group came up to the two. "You didn't want to turn around so my friend had to made you. We just wanted to...wait a second." The grin on his face grew bigger. Even though this male was slightly smaller than him, his aura made him somehow bigger. "Aren't you the new bartender at Miragen's?"

Shit, Himuro thought, pushing away all his nervousness. It stopped raining but now his cold and wet clothes made him shiver which he tried to surpress. The grip on his arm was still there and he gave Haizaki a stare. This one let go of him and held his hands up before him. "Looked like you were about to fall." He crossed his arms again before his chest and stepped next to the smaller male. "Yes I am. You must be Hanamiya-san and Haizaki-san. I heard about you." The Kirisaki Daichii captain cocked an eyebrow and pocked Haizaki with his elbow. "I guess we're famous! But we don't know your name?" Himuro felt like someone was growing himself behind him and leaned over.

The black haired male jotled and reflexively turned around to grab the neck form the boy with one strong grip. Pulling tehe guy towards himself, he rammed his knee into the guy's stomach. Another one was following and Himuro ducked, to kick the guy's legs so that he fell on top of his friend. Hanamiya and Haizaki stepped back and hooted. As a third male dashed towards Himuro, Hanamiya held up his hand. "Woah, pal what was that? Did you play too much Tekken or something?" Hanamiya laughed again while Haizaki let his knuckles click. "I'm good at this too." He purred making Himuro step back. The two boys on the ground stood up with groaning noises and walked behind Hanamiya who acted as if he were sorry for them. "My apologies if we came near to you, ... umh?" That guy was still waiting for his name. Himuro sighed. He couldn't deny saying his name because of those two being Miragen's loyal customers. "Himuro Tatsuya. I'm sorry too, It was a reflex." His hands were trembling as he clenched them to fists beside his body.

Haizaki mustered him from head to toe which felt like a touch. "Nice moves. I recognize one of ... my generation when I see one." Himuro didn't let him out of his sight because if this fellow would appear behind him, he surely wouldn't be able to bring him down so easily. And what the hell did he mean by generation? Hanamiya rubbed his chin. "Himuro-san, how come you're alone at this hour and totally wet? You shouldn't be wandering in this area at this." He clapped his hands together as if he got the ultimate plan. "Would you mind accompanying us to our residence? You must be freezing!" Himuro's heart started to pump faster. This was getting really dangerous. "That's very friendly from you, but I'll be-" He had been cut off as Hanamiya put an arm around his shoulder, dragging him with himself. "I insist you'll come with us, since you injured two of my friends." Himuro gritted his teeth. What has he gotten himself into? "Don't worry we'll behave." Haizaki appeared on the other side of him. Just why couldn't he believe those words?

His eye tried to catch up every blind spot and every quirk of the group. If things would get ugly he would know where to hit just to get free. But those two wouldn't dare to do something bad to him since he was an bartender at their favourite casino. Would they? Their so called residence was a a luxuries house about 15 min away from the casino. As soon as Hanamiya stood in front of the door, he gave his friends a nod who walked away from them. Only Haizaki was left when they entered the big hall and closed the door. While Hanamiya checked his mobile phone, Haizaki took the lead and guided Himuro to a room that looked like a living room from an expensive hotel. Did he live alone or did he rent it? He heard about Kirisaki Daichii and the inane prices just like the brilliant students over there. Hanamiya grinned as he saw Himuro marveling and took off his jacket.

The male with the dreads made himself comfortable at the big couch, legs widely apart and arms sprawled out on the armrest. This could be a gangster movie, Himuro though. He had been pushed down next to the bigger male as Hanamiya sat next to him. "But I'm still wet, I'll make your sofa dirty." Himuro quickly said and was about to stand up, but Haizaki's hand on his thigh held him down. Crap. "Heh, so polite." "Don't worry, we'll be taking care of you." Hanamiya smiled devilishly. At this point Himuro's panic button had been switched on as Haizaki ran his hand up his thigh. He grabbed that hand, digging his nails into the skin and giving the male a death glare. "Ouch, I guess he's not in the mood to play." Haizaki didn't think about moving his hands even though Himuro wanted to push it back. He heard Himuro's snickering in his ear and shivered.

His breath hitched. "Easy there, pretty boy. We're not as bad as we look like. Here, this will realx you." Without any warning, Hanamiya pressed his lips against Himuro's. The black haired male struggled instantly but has been pressed down by the other boy. A tongue pushed through his lips, rubbed against his own and make him choke. As they parted, Himuro swallowed something. That's when Hazaiki let go of him, only to see him jolting up and touching his neck. "W-what did you-?!" But Hanamiya leant back, one leg over the other. A smug smile on his lips. "Don't worry, nothing hard. Just a chill-pill." He winked at him. "You look really tired." While the smaller male patted the sofa, Himuro felt like his legs were about to give in. He shook his head and stumbled backwards but Haizaki took his arm to let him fly on the sofa. He turned around to look with half lidded eyes at the ceiling. Was going to get raped? "What are you two doing to me now?" He sighed while holding his stomach. Two heads apperead before his sight."We're just going to change your clothes." Hanamiya smiled and stood up. Haizaki titled his head while looking down at him. "But seriousely, you need to tell me form which area you are.Your moves are quite something." The next thing was a mouth on his neck and a hand underneath his wet shirt, sowly pulling it up.

They left his upper body naked for some time, mustering his torso as if he was an object to dissect. The smaller male ran his hands down his cold body, making him shiver. Haizaki looked at his watch, tapping with his finger on the sofa while Hanamiya brought fresh clothes and put them on the table. He snapped with his fingers at Haizaki who understood and picked up the Yosen ace bridal style. He carried him to the bathroom and sat him on the toilet. Hanamiya gave him a fresh pair of boxer shorts. "Try to change yourself. I don't want to be seen as a molester. Himuro looked at him through a hazy fog, knitting his eyebrows as if he was looking at the sun. "What are you up to?" He sounded as if he was drunk. Hanamiya put a finger before his lips and made 'shhhht' sound before he turned around, giving Himuro the privacy to get changed. The Yosen player didn't waste any time and almost tripped over his own feet as he changed himself. When Hanamiya turned around, Himuro stumbled and fell on top of him. They fell to the floor which made Haizaki to come. He whisteled at the sight. Himuro clenched his hands into fists as he was lying on that guy, only in his briefs.

"Bastard," Hanamiya growled as he insulted the man above them. "Are you cheating on me?" Himuro had been picked up again and sat down on the sofa. As he grabbed the shirt on the table and pulled it over his head, he saw the two men kissing each other. "As if." He heard Haizaki. "But couldn't you have a bigger ass?" Seeing how Haizaki's hands massaged the other male's bottom made Himuro blush and he quickly turn away. Now it was Hanamiya's turn to snicker. "Can't you have a bigger dick?" Himuro's expression spoke volumes, He had no clue what was going on and the drug hammered his head. They heard a soft noise and saw that Himuro fell down on the ground.

What did he got himself into again, was the last thing on his mind before it went blank.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MORTAL COMBAAAT .... FIGHT okay not quite....  
> however, we're coming to the 'bittersweet' part of the story.
> 
> thank you for reading, commenting and of course thanks for the kudos <3

**Author's Note:**

> There will be more fluffs, some smut and a real plot so don't worry! It's not pwp! (At least not only...)
> 
> Just a little intro... Oh, and if you find some grammatical issues, you can keep them!  
> Nah just kidding. I'm still learning to master this language so don't be too hard on me ;)
> 
> Thanks for reading!


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